18 Month Rocking to Sleep

You can't keep rocking him. He needs to learn to self soothe and fall asleep. It is what is best for him in the long run. You could try creating a new routine, like reading a story, listening to some sleepy music and then off to bed. It will be bad for a while as crying is the only way he knows at this point to object....and who wouldn't object!! This will be harder on you than him.

Good luck!

We can't do the cry it out method either. We do have a solid routine in place which helps set his mind. We read several stories and then he either fall asleep in my arms or settles down in bed- as long as he had a busy day, not a late or too long of a nap, etc... I do enjoy looking at his little angel face and seeing what a sweet boy we were blessed with. Those moments to me are priceless! When he is not too tired, I do stand beside my son's crib and just be there for about 15 minutes before leaving. Believe it or not, he does better if the air kicks on and the noise/coolness puts him right out. I don't rock him because a girlfriend told me she had to rock her daughter till she was 5 years old. I can't imagine rocking a 5 year old. (Otherwise I probably would be a rocker too!) I am looking for a better way to get my son to sleep too, but right now this works for us. I always want him to go to sleep with happy thoughts and when he is in my arms it appears he is smiling! Good luck and thanks for asking a great question.

I had a very similar situation with my daughter. I didn't mind rocking her (after 19 months of nursing, I didn't know what to do to get her to sleep) but I realized with number 2 on the way I needed a little more time in the evenings. I also couldn't do the cry it out method. Here's what worked for me (although my daughter was nearly 2 when I started it so her language and comprehension was a litte more developed simply because she was older). We did our normal bedtime routine (bath, book, talk about our day) then, when that was done, instead of rocking, I put her in the crib and told her "mommy is going to sit right here in the rocking chair and read a book... you can go to sleep but mommy is right here." The first night she cried but, given I was 5 feet away in the rocking chair, I simply told her I was still in the room, gave her a hug and went back to the chair to read my book (I bought several books and a reading light so I was entertained). The goal was to get her to fall asleep on her own (i.e. without rocking or nursing). Plus, I didn't feel as if I was "abandoning" her. She was fine in her crib and would go to sleep so long as I was in my chair (as she would tell me "mommy sit chair." Not to mention, I got alot of reading done). After I felt she had mastered falling asleep on her own, I told her that mommy had to go do something (I picked any activity.. wash the dishes, start the laundry, etc) that didn't take too long (maybe 5 minutes) and I would be back to check on her. After 5 minutes I would go back and check on her and then resume my position in the chair. She cried for the first 2 weeks or so (but we are only talking about 5 minutes). After 2 weeks she didn't cry but was certainly ready for me to come back after the 5 minutes. Once she conquered the 5 minute time period, I did activities that took longer, eventually leading up to "mommy is going to take a shower." Eventually, she was so comfortable in the knowledge that I was going to come back and sit in the chair after I had done my activity that she'd fall asleep in the interim. Now (after about 3 months), I'm able to put her down, wide awake and leave the room and she falls asleep on her own (although she still doesn't make it through the night... that's my next battle to conquer).
Sorry for such a long response but I've been where you are. Good luck!!!

I think what ever works best for your family may be different then for mine and I think there isn't a "wrong" way to do things. I used the Ferber method and my 22 month old has put herself to sleep since she was 6 months. She was breast fed for a year and I got used to feeding her until she was asleep. Then carefully placing her in her crib. It would sometimes take hours because she'd wake up and I'd have to start all over again. We would have friends over and I'd be in her room. The Ferber method was so easy and it wasn't like I abandoned her at all. Some people feel that letting them cry is a bad thing. I disagree. I was given the example of being an adult and having to sleep without your favorite pillow. It's hard to get used to at first, but after a couple of days we're fine. Baby's need to be able to put themselves to sleep. There's something to be said about reading her a book and putting her in bed, giving her a kiss and walking out and spending time with my husband. You're doing a wonderful job learning as you go and whatever works for you and your family is best!
Good luck with this! Soon you'll have mastered it and moved onto something else!
~J.

If you're okay with rocking him to sleep nightly, then let it be. They're only this little once. :) Eat it up.

You're not going to hurt him. Maybe spoil him a little bit, but there are much worse ways a mother could spoil their children. :)

I say do what makes you happy. They are only small for a little while and one day they don't want you to even give them a hug, so rock to sleep all you want. There are lots of theories about how to put them to bed, many no-no's about things not to do--but you have to keep your own council. My son just turned four, and I got into the habit of reading to him at night, and then if I tried to leave, he would cry, so basically I ended up sleeping with him every night. Well, I finally had enough and when he turned four I told him big boys don't sleep with their moms. Well, I guess he was ready because I left him to cry a little one night, and the next night he was so proud that he said he doesn't want me to sleep with him anymore. Problem solved. He is a well adjusted kid, very loving, happy. That's what we want, right? Anyway, point is, do what you feel is right; you know what to do.
A.

Everyone is different, so I will just tell you what worked for us. I still rock my son to sleep every night and he's 19 month old. I nursed him to sleep for 10 months too and then we transitioned to rocking to sleep. Now I rock him for 10 minutes and put him in his crib even if he isn't asleep. He will only fuss for 30 seconds or less (but usually he just rolls over and goes to sleep). I wouldn't trade my cuddle time for anything. He self soothes when he wakes up in the middle of the night just fine without screaming it out.

What I did in the past was to rock for awhile then lie next to my son and read to him .Then I'd close my eyes and go to sleep or at least pretend . Then when he'd fall asleep I'd leave. For some children background sounds are good because they feel safer because they know you or someone is still around. this works best if ,when they wake up, someone goes in to them right away or they'll be afraid to fall asleep next time. I also believe in a box S. and mattress on the floor next to the family bed if it can be set up totally safe so the baby doesn't get hurt on anything,or with smaller babies ,safe to prevent them from smothering in a pillow or fluffy blanket.
good luck
S.

I rocked my son to sleep until around 13 months old. I still rocked him, but he got to a point where he would get really sleepy, but could no longer fall asleep unless I put him down in his crib. I didn't have to "teach" him to sooth himself, he did it on his own. He is a big boy and i think he just wasn't comfortable enough anymore until he laid down. I am having my second in August and I will rock her too! There are times when you think it would be easier not to, but those times were rare for me. Sitting there watching them sleep, I can't wait! don't feel pressured by books that say you shouldn't be doing it like I did. I still stuck with it, but I always felt I shoudln't be. Enjoy it because his will be out of that stage soon!

Well get ready to loose a lot of sleep. YOu son is not self soothing. I nursed my dau for 21 months and the next best thing is a pacifier but she sucked that until she was 3. my son sucks his tongue so he did not need a pacifier. The cry out method is the only method for me and it only last about 3 days. I know some people can't do it and it is not for everyone. Read books and tt your pedi they might have better advice. Good luck

They are only young once. Enjoy the time you have. Rock, Rock, Rock.

if you want to rock him to sleep, go ahead. there's no right or wrong here. it's a personal choice that you have to make. if the cry it out thing doesn't work for you, try a few different things and see if it helps. and for all those out there that think letting them cry it out is evil and will destroy their little souls...it's not true. i occasionally let mine cry it out and they are happy, healthy and trust us and tell us everything.

you might try putting a few of his favorite toys in the crib with him so he'll be able to sit quietly and play until he falls asleep. this worked with my oldest son. also, we found that all of our children needed a sippy cup with some juice or sugar free koolaid in the crib with them. sometimes they would wake up thirsty and scream until we came in there. now, my 3 and 4 year olds don't wake up at night for something to drink but my almost 2 year old still does. i'll hear him wake up with a grunt or two and then i'll hear him sipping away on the cup. then a few minutes later i hear it thump up against the side of the crib and he goes back to sleep all by himself.

to sum it all up though, it's your choice. if there's no reason why you CAN'T rock him to sleep then by all means go ahead. people will tell you it spoils them and yada yada...also not true. they will eventually be able to get themselves to sleep. my mother has always been that "rock them to sleep" mom. I'm happy to say, I can get myself to sleep just fine and I'm not spoiled at all. Well...maybe a little but that's my husband's fault...not hers lol.

I rocked my girls long after nursing. He will let you know when he doesn't want to be rocked any longer. One day when you go to rock him he will just tell you no. Enjoy it while it lasts. Rocking your son is a great bonding time for both of you. To bad more Moms didn't take time to rock their children.

Hi L.:

In my opinion, rocking your child to sleep is a magical and wonderful experience. I have a 15 month old and we rock him to sleep each and every night. It's a great time for both of us to relax and take a few deep breaths at the end of our hectic days. Not only that, but I get to watch my beautiful little boy fall asleep peacefully and be completely content and I love it. I see absolutely no harm in it - after all, I've never heard of a mom rocking a 16 year old to sleep! Enjoy it while it lasts because they grow up so fast.

I rocked my daughter to sleep while nursing until she was 13 months old. When we stopped nursing I still rocked her but with a little story book. If your son stays awake, maybe he just needs the extratime being close to you. Nothing wrong with that. Give him more time and I am so glad you don't let him cry himself to sleep!! That's a terrible thing to do.

Hi, L. -

When my older son was a baby I rocked him to sleep. When he got a little bigger I "walked" him to sleep. All my friends told me to put him in his bed and let him scream. My mommy instinct just wouldn't allow that.

Was my back tired from carrying him for sometimes hours? Yes. Did I get a little less "me" time because I spent a lot of time rocking or walking my son to sleep? Yes.

Would I trade the time I spent rocking or walking with him that bonded us forever in our relationship and that I consider to this day to be time that is so special and precious and that I'll never be able to have with him again? Not on your life.

Rock your little guy and enjoy every minute of it.

P.S. My son had no sleep problems as he got older and sleeps like a rock in his own bed (and always has) all night long.

L.,
Against what most of the mothers here say. I myself loved that time with my daughter and we rocked her until she was 4 years old. Basically she would crawl up in our lap when she was tired and be out in minutes. We would read a book or tell a story. She knew when we sang rock a bye baby that was going to put her out. If she didn't really want to sleep, which they usually fight it, she would say "NO, don't sing the song!"LOL Because she knew it knocked her out. But I think you do whatever you want to do, this is your child and you aren't harming him, spoiling him yes. But my daughter is now 8 and has slept in her own bed and gone to bed on her own for many years now. I now sometimes go lay with her, because I miss that bonding time. When you work all day and don't get quality time, I think you need some. I know alot of people disagree with this, but its what worked for us. Besides these kids grow up so fast, its like a blink of an eye and they are in college. There is nothing wrong in my eyes of keeping them a child as long as possible!
Good luck on your decision.
S.

Enjoy all the time you can with your baby....he's only 1 1/2 and I don't think that little ones are meant to have the ability and maturity to be independent and not need parents, especially for something like soothing and puttting themselves to sleep. Spend that time with him, that's why we have little ones right...to spend time with them, be there for them and let them grow and mature at their own pace. Like many moms have said, soon (sooner than we plan for!) he will not want or need you to put him to sleep. When that day comes you will only have the precious memories you are making for yourself of holding him, ricking him and being there. What a wonderful thought....what a much more happy memory than one about him screaming and crying for you while his needs are ignored if he were left to 'baby train' and cry-it-out....

My daughter is 11 months old and I put her to sleep laying with me every night. She is baby # 4, (other 3 are teeneagers now!) and I too let them all fall asleep with me and then put them to bed. They eventually do outgrow it. One day they arent going to want you IN their room let alone rock them so I say go for it!! They grow so fast! if your baby is happy and you dont mind, what is it hurting??? Good luck with your decision!