2 Year Old Hitting Only Mom

My son was 2 when he went through this also. He would only hit me. It lasted for a while, but i would just grab is hand tell him NO, and then take my hand and touch his face and say gently. We be gentle and then have him do that to me so he learned what being gentle was. If he continued to hit he would sit in a time out. I agree, you need to just keep putting him there. My son is almost 3 now and i still have to bring him back a few times before he will sit there. Good luck, i know it is frustrating but the stage will pass.

I agree with McMama.. The moment he hits or starts to hit, punches, bangs his head into you, grab his hand as fast as possible and look right into his eyes and tell him NO HITTING! in the sternest voice you can come up with.

Time outs do work if you place him in them EVERYtime! 2 minutes. If he gets up before the 2 minutes, place him back as many times as necessary.

Spanking and slapping are also hitting, so if he hits you and then you hit him? Do you think it confuses him?

No one should be hitting at any time. A 2 year old does not understand why if he hits you you get mad and then hit back. Instead teach him, "soft and gentle." If he wants to hit, tell him, "soft and gentle with mommy". "Soft and gentle with friends", "Soft and gentle with puppy".

Now the reason for the hitting is that he is frustrated, angry or excited. Give him the words.. I know you are frustrated, but no hitting. I can tell you are mad, but no hitting. etc.. Look at where your hands are. You can clap when you are excited, but not hit.

When he hits you, grab his hand, arm, foot, etc and tell him NO! We do not hit, hands are for hugging and helping. If he laughs or smiles, ignore it. If he does it again, put him in timeout. This can be where ever you choose - for me, it's where I feel like putting my daughter. Sometimes it's in the same room as me, sometimes it's in the other room just out of earshot but where I can see her, sometimes it's in her room. The idea is that she will be removed from people and the situation if she cannot behave. I explain that we do not hit (or throw) and if she hits her toy (or throws it), she loses it until she can say sorry. I explain that she can get out of timeout when she is ready to listen and say she is sorry. This can take as long or little as she wants. This also works when she is pouting/crying over not getting her way.

I do not think hitting is the right answer and you said timeouts are a joke - is this only because he's laughing at you? If so I suggest putting him in timeout then walking into another room because then he has no one to laugh at. If he gets up, put him back in.

I explain when my daughter hits me (she'll be 3 in Aug) that it hurt me and I make a sad face and sometimes I'll mock cry. She is very quick to apologize and give me a kiss.

Good luck!

I have read before that a child will only hit a person he trusts, because he knows he can show you his feelings, and he is comfortable with you. I have a friend who's son is a perfect angel at daycare, and the second she picks him up, he starts crying and hitting. Im guessing that he holds in his big emotions through most of the day, and when mommy comes he is comfortable to show her his feelings he can't express to anyone else. He knows she will be there for him no matter what, so he feels its ok to let her know he may have had a bad day. This might not be the case for all kids (and Im not saying hitting is OK, at all) but your son may be showing you these feelings because he trusts you the most. Hopefully he will grow out of it soon. Just remind him that its not ok to hit, if he laughs I would walk away. good luck!

My oldest only hit me as well. Spanking or hitting certainly wouldn't have worked with my son - in general, you can't teach "no hitting" by hitting.

I tried to act like I was crying & he often thought this was funny too. (This works with son #2 though.)

With son #1, what I finally did was firmly say "no hitting". If I was in a place where I could put him down and walk away, I did. Sometimes I'd say "Mommy is a person, just like you. Hitting hurts me."

I'd like to say "this worked!" but honestly, I think he just outgrew it. Your son will too.

p.s. Initially, for time-outs, we had to hold him in our laps and wrap our arms around him. Otherwise, he would have run around the room laughing.

My son went through this hitting phase when he was around 18 months. This is what worked for us: when he hit us we would hold both of his hands firmly (but not to the point of pain) so he couldn't hit us again, then we would get down on his level and speak to him in his face "we do NOT hit mommy (daddy, grandma, etc.)" We would speak in a low and firm voice that showed him we meant business. We told him that hitting hurts and, then we told him the next time he did it, he would go to time-out. Time-outs are very effective if you do it properly. I think the SuperNanny method works the best, but you have to follow it exactly. After a few weeks, we didn't have a problem anymore. We think our son was using hitting as a way to express himself, because he couldn't use words. It sounds like your son is doing it because he knows he can, and because he likes how you to respond to his hitting; it amuses him. If he's old enough to say "hitting mommy", then he can understand that hitting hurts you, and that there are consequences to his hitting you. Good luck and I hope this helps!

Time outs only don't work if you don't make them work. If he gets up, put him back. EVERY TIME. That's your job. With my son, the first time it took 17 times and 45 minutes. The second time it took about 5 times and 15 minutes. After that, we've never had him get back up. He knows that he has to sit there. Take a weekend and enforce timeouts and you will be shocked how well they work after a day or 2.

As you've probably figured out, hitting as a consequence for hitting doesn't work. It doesn't make any sense.

Kids are much worse with their moms-- because they know they can trust us to still love them even when they are bad. Totally normal. But you need to figure out a way to control his actions. I think either totally ignoring him (not just the hitting, but leaving him everytime he hits) or time outs are your best bet. But he is going to hit from time to time. Just make sure you give a consistent, appropriate response when he does, and it will get better.

If you want to try a different approach, get the book "Playful Parenting" by Larwence Cohen. It gives you ideas and techniques to change the tone of an interaction so that your son goes from angry/frustrated to happy/fun. To me, spanking because of hitting would be confusing because it's okay for you to hit, but not him. I would think that would be hard for a 2yr old to grasp the difference between the two.

Not sure if he's hitting when he's frustrated or just because he thinks it's "fun". If it's the latter, schedule some safe roughousing like pillow fights or something to get out that energy. Many toddlers hit, or bite or pinch. They do grow out of it whether or not a parent spanks/timeouts/punishes. They just need time to grow into their self-restraint abilities just like they are growing into their language abilities and motor control.

Hugs though. It's frustrating!

I've been putting my 2 year old in her room alone whenever she pushes me. It's a new thing she started up this past week. It seems to have worked.

I just pick up her and put her in room --no words. After two minutes, I then ask her if she knows why she was put in her room, etc.