Bath Time?? - Federal Way,WA

I only have one child so far (18 months) and it has helped all of us to be be on a schedule. Every night dinner around 6 or 6:30, then straight to the bath and then settle down time for bed around 7:30 - 8. We wash with soap and shampoo only a couple times a week though. The other nights just warm water and sometimes bubbles if she asks for them. It's pretty monotonous but she seems to do well when we're very scheduled. Friday nights we will let routine slide but only because I'm so tired from working all week that I just want to be lazy. We'll see how things change with the next one on the way...

Hi E.,
We do baths every other night. My 5 year old likes to take showers by himself (we're in the bathroom) and the younger two take a bath together. We do it right after dinner and it has been a great routine.

Every other day is usually good. Every day can actually dry a little ones skin out, especially the baby.
Whoever said bathes calm kids down must of been nuts! All of mine got hyper after the bath. I just made bath time a little earlier and have them do calm activities after. Maybe a cup of milk cuddle in a blanket and watch a short movie might help. Best of Luck!!

Wash 'em when they're stinky and let 'em play as long as they want!! Especially the oldest. If the older 2 can share the tub, fine, but you might want to let them each have their own time. The baby doesn't need more than 10 min (and only a couple of times a week if that), and going in with brothers for a few mins seems fine, if it's working for you.

There are so many toys you can get for water. My 4yo son is really into his water flutes right now, but he also also a submarine that can be built in different ways, things that dive, things that float, things that swim when a string is pulled, cups to pour into each other (and over the head when washing hair!), body paints (fun!), colored tablets so the water can be red or blue or yellow (the colors even mix well and don't stain the tub), and foamy things that stick to the side of the tub (we have ABCs and knights with a castle and dragon, these also work on the shower walls). He picks out what he wants to play with, sometimes the tub is full of all of those things, and other times he entertains himself with just 1 toy. Sometimes I read stories to him while he plays, sometimes I read my own book when he is deep into play (like making the knights "talk" who plan an attack on the dragon).

I think the key is letting them do their thing for as long as they want to. Just some ideas!

I bath my boys (age 3 and 5) every other day right now, but in the summer I bath them most every day and just wash their hair every other time. This is because we live in Alaska and spend most every day in the woods during the warmer months and the boys get very dirty. In the winter they are not playing in the mud, so they don't need a bath every day, and my youngest gets really dry skin if he gets washed every day. You just have to do what works best for your family and schedule. My boys have school on Mon/Wed/Fri afternoons so they get a bath on those mornings. If we are out all weekend hiking/snowshoeing ect, then they often go Saturday and Sunday without a bath and then get their regular bath on Monday morning.

I would say once a week in too seldom, and every day is too often. Any thing in between is great. :)

HOLY MOLY! Don't bathe them everyday or you will be crazy.

Saturday night and Wednesday only... of course, extra baths if needed. Give your older boys something to hold on to/play with as you wash them.

I have never found any of those "soothing" or "calming" products to work. What place is more fun than the tub?!?

When you take your middle child out of the tub, start draining the water. Your oldest might be glad to get out of the tub if it's nearly empty and he's starting to get chilly!!

Hi Libby,

Just a suggestion here...it sounds like your 3 year old loves his water play time. There's a reason so many preschools offer water time at sensory table- it's a wonderful and relaxing way for children to explore with boats, containers, cups and funnels. Children love scooping and pouring, and there's something so magical to them about being in water. They, and their imaginations, can thrive in it. 15-20 minutes and they're often just getting started, so that may be where your conflict is coming from. This is where your and your son's opinions of how long bathtime should take vastly differ.

That said, perhaps you could think of sticking bathtime in your day as a play activity whenever you and the kids have a 40-60 minute stretch. Or you could put it in your schedule. I know children who can spend 30-45 minutes in the tub, and they have a ball. Your littlest one can sit with you in the bathroom and snuggle, you can take a deep breath and let your two bigger ones play until they are done. You could do it spontaneously when other plans fall through or it's too cold to play outside, it doesn't have to be scheduled in. Or you could put it in your schedule.

If your kids have enough time in the bath, it may be that the desire for calm will happen all on it's own.:)

On average we bathe our 2 year old boy every other day. Sometimes we go for three days without a bath if things are busy and if he isn't too dirty. Or somtimes we bathe him every day if he gets really messy from eating or playing outside or if he asks for a bath. I don't think every day is really necessary unless they just really have fun taking baths or if it helps them wind down for bedtime then it is probably a good routine. With three boys to chase around though I don't know how you have the energy to bathe them more than a few times a week. Just my one little wild man wears me out!

E.,

I think a schedule is key. At lease in my house it is. Things go so much easier if you and the kids know what comes next. My son is 2 almost 2 1/2 and we give him a bath every night. We have always done it that way since we was about a year old. I do understand it might be hard having three to give a bath too. When we have my step son with us we do like you have, youngest comes out first and so on.
I dont know what to tell you about the craziness of the bath time. We have that problem too.

Good luck!

We shoot for 2-3 bath/week and more when they need it. Mine are 6 & 9. I'm trying to get them in in the late afternoon before dinner (before dad gets home) to make more time in the evening for them to be w/daddy. Of course, not sure that will hold once the days get longer, but I've got a few months!
As for calming in the tub....I don't know of anything other than the lavender.

I try for every other day - my kids have skin like mine that dries out easily. The doctor has said that bathing every day aggravates this. I only have two but I also get the youngest out first then the older one. If your 3 year old is giving you a hard time about getting out tell him he will have to take a bath by himself, with no toys. Then follow through and be consistent. I always let the older one help put in the bubbles and toys for the bath - that is how I get him into the tub. My husband also frequently helps with getting them out and into jammies so there is a quick, easy transition to bed.

I like the term "full giggle." :-)

As long as there is bubbles and splashing, not sure that any product will calm them down.. lol

My kids bathe every other day or even every other-other day (unless they are dirty/or it is spagetti night ;-)
Every day is ok if you rub them down with lotion after. bathing everyday tends to dry out their skin. but on the same token my toddler loves the mini-massage, that helps calm her down.
Maybe have your hubby stay in the bathroom with the other boys and you could get each boy out and give them a mini-massge (i use the johnson & johnson bedtime lotion cause i love the sent, it calms me-lol)
Have fun and GO HAWKS!!

For us baths are treats and play-time. They happen twice a week and usually in the late afternoon, before dinner. We do shower every morning washing just the bodies. With his swimming lessons, he gets his hair washed 3 times per week and I think this is more than enough. I just had read an article this morning that you shouldn't wash your hair more than once per week. It was an advice from some kind of celebrity hair stylist. My advice is use the baths as play-times and shower when they need it. That way you won't have to deal with all the mess and work in the evening when you are too tired to share the fun. Good luck!

I've bathed 2 preschoolers at the same time and it wasn't too tiring. The kids were a bit older than yours. I'm wondering if including the 5 mos old baby is the extra that makes this not work. At 3 and 2 they are more independant. You don't have to watch them so closely so that they don't slip and fall. With the older ones in with the baby you have to keep the older ones less active. Having 3 kids in the tub at that age at the same time feels overwhelming to me. I'd bathe the baby another time; perhaps even another time of the day.

When my grandkids get rowdy in the tub we take one out. The next bath time, only one goes in at a time. Natural consequences sort of thing. If that time goes well we can try it again with 2.

Another thing that I do is I sit on the closed toilet and watch while they play for 15 or so minutes. Then I did the hair or any place that was still in need of soap.

My daughter gives her kids (8 and 5)a bath when she notices an odor or they're covered with dirt. I think they get a bath 3-4 times/week. She rarely has them bathe right before bedtime because they play off each other and get more energy. Now that they can pretty much bathe themselves one or the other sometimes takes a bath before dinner. They also take a shower with her sometimes in the morning. She started doing that when her daughter was around 3. I think she takes in one kid at a time so they both don't usually
have a bathe or a shower on the same day.

My daughter showers everyday. Kids don't have that odiferous perspiration problem that requires a more often bath or shower. Perhaps your husband could shower with one boy and you the other. At 2 both of my grandkids often sat at the foot of the tub with toys while Mom showered and then she held her/him to wash them.

If your kids have a bath often, say every 3 days or so, and if they're not outside playing in the mud there really isn't much to do in a bath. Playing in the water along with a couple of swipes with soap seems to clean them. If you use a soap or shampoo for babies their eyes don't sting even after it gets in the water.

Over the years how often one bathed has change. Way back people got a bath once a year. When I was growing up I had a bath once a week and so did everyone else I knew. When I was a preschooler we didn't have running water, which was somewhat common still, and so I probably didn't get a bath once a week even.
We had "spit baths."

My daughter does "spit" baths when there isn't time for the full bath and they're grubby, smelly. In the summer when the kids get really dirty feet I sometimes just have them one at a time sit on the edge of the tub while I wash their feet and legs.

I haven't found anything to use in the tub that quiets a child down. One at a time is usually easier.

My granddaughter, who's 8, takes a bath or shower to calm herself. She takes her Little Pet Shop animals with her and has wonderful creative conversations and action with them. She started that around 3 or 4. Before that age both kids had water toys to include a few plastic cups and bowls. Bath time was often play time. I sat and watched.

I would shoot for every other day or sometimes even two days in between, depending how dirty they get. We bathe every other or every two days, unless she is wearing her dinner in her hair.
Bathing everyday just for the heck of it is really not good for the skin, it destroys the natural barrier the skin produces to help ward of infections and heal scratches and such easier.

As for a calming bath addition, with boys I would stay away from lavender oil, as it has been linked to the growth of breast tissue in pre-pubescent boys, but camomille and vanilla is what I would try.
I would say that any bath additives won't help if your boys aren't ready to calm down. Try calming games, like bath books, bath paint, blowing bubbles and turn down the lights a bit, you could even get those flameless (battery operated) candles to make it a nice calm atmosphere.
Good look!

E.-

I have 3 kids (2 boys and a girl) and we bathe them every other day. My oldest (6) takes showers by himself Mon-Wed-Fri(a big hassle-saver) and we bathe the little ones seperately Tue-Thu-Sat. Usually my husband will bathe one and I do the other.

Every other day and splitting the duties makes the whole thing less crazy. But I have yet to find anything that calms them in the tub. They love to splash and kick and make lots of noise in the tub. So I've given up on "calm" bathtimes. We make reading time their "calm" time.

But whatever you choose, make sure it's a schedule that works for you and your whole family. I know it can be tough, but hang in there! You'll get it eventually.

Best of Luck!
-B. M.-

The number of times a week that we bathe our children is such a controversial subject. I personally believe they don't need to be bathed everyday. And my doc has backed me up on this. During the summer, they get dirtier, and I bathe every other day probably, but during these cold months, unless there is some kind of potty accident, I bathe twice a week. I know you are trying to get into a schedule, but make it a little easier on yourself! It is healthier for their hair and their skin to not bathe everyday! So anyways, that is my opinion, but their is an interesting discussion on this topic on this webpage I found:
http://www.parentdish.com/2008/03/07/how-often-to-bathe-k...
Good luck to you!

E. -
I bathe my children whenever! Sometimes I notice that my older one (6) is getting a little "funky", into the shower he goes!! Sometimes it's every day and sometimes it's every two or three days. It just depends.
I would not bathe the 5 month old with the 2 and 3 year old. That's too much work. Bathe the 5 month old on his own.
You don't need to put any chemicals in the water to calm them. Warm water is enough to relax the muscles. When you get into a jacuzzi you don't need lavender, right? Just the nice warm water relaxes you.
L.

I have 2 kids and we bathe them 2-3 times a week. My daughter has really oily hair so she needs the head washed more then my son. Sometimes my husband and I each take a kid with us in the shower, or we will take them both one at a time (they both could fit at once until they got bigger) in the shower and the parent that is out gets to dry them and get them dressed. We have been doing that since the first one was a couple of months old. They also take baths still and like to play with toys, they get to pick whatever toys they want (it changes every bath) they get their play time and then one of us comes in and washes their hair and bodies, we have installed a shower wand and they stand up now for the wash part. For you I would bath the two older boys together most of he time and have the baby in a bouncer or down for a nap and then later after Dad got home go hop in the tub with the little one and get a bit of a break or don't hop in and let him have his water time. Sometimes my daughter just wants a fun bath with no washing and you could do that with your oldest son, he is old enough to be in the tub without you siting there next to him as long as you are in earshot. Oh and my kids usually don't want bubbles or anything in the water anymore.

I would say with three boys under 3, you are handling it like a champ! It's supposed to be hard at this age, and I do believe boys make it a bit harder (I have two). Just keep doing what you're doing, and maybe add some soft music as they're getting dressed for bed.
I would still do a bath every night, even if you don't wash their hair every night or necessarily scrub them down. Our boys love their bath time and just enjoy playing with the water and toys. And I do believe it calms them down. We'll do a good scrub-down and thorough hair washing less often, but just a soak is fine, even if for just a few minutes. And that will definitely help get the routine down!
Good luck and keep at it! If it's any advice, our doctor recently said that all the baby soaps are pretty much the same. Anything with a nice scent would probably help calm them calm down. And if you use lotion, that can be relaxing also after the bath.

We do every other day...too often can dry skin (although we were in Denver when our son was really little - that effect is probably more noticable there). On non-bath nights, we wash face and hands and neck with a washcloth - but unless he is really really messy from school or something, everyother night seems to work fine for us.

every other day at the MOST. it is so bad for their skin, especially the little one. we do baths twice a week and my two year old still has baby soft skin. my 8 year old gets a bath more often because of running around at school. I'm not willing to give up my daily showers but I'm not going to give my children the skin problems I've had from over bathing. Have you asked you pediatrician? They will tell you that it's not a good idea to bath kids daily.

-Brandi

My advice would be to give the 5 month old a bath by himself. Maybe about a half an hour before his last feeding before bed. The other two I would put in together either right after dinner or shortly there after. After bath time you can use "desert" as a way to get them out of the tub. It could be something very simple like some jello with fruit in it, or some pudding, just something light and simple. It gives them something to look forward to when they get out of the bath and a reason to hurry up and get their bath done with. But don't make it a rush rush bath because bath time play is fun and important as well. Let them have some "bath toys" to play with or fun soaps and 10 minutes before they need to be out tell them, "ok in 5 minutes mom is going to rinse you off and get you guys out so we can have desert! Yay!" Make it fun like I said and give them something to look forward to. I used to give my son desert about an hour and a half before bed. Also one thing I learned was to always give them warning as to what was to be expected, like if they are nap takers then 15 minutes before nap time say "Ok boys it is almost nap time so in 5 minutes mom is going to come in here and have you pick up your toys and get ready for nap. Same with bed time. Same with going out or dinner or pretty much anything. Give them the first notice and then 5 minutes or so say "ok it's time to start getting your coats and shoes on or it's time to wash your hands for dinner" and so on. givng them a count down warning makes the transition from one event to the next alot smoother. And while looking forward to football season is great keep in mind that kids don't relate to that and they need your time and attention during football season just like any other time of the year. So to stress your self about being able to sit down and just watch football while they are that little will only make things worse. Sorry but your a mom now so Kids first, TV second. At least til they are older and don't need as much of your attention or they are old enough to sit and enjoy the game with you.
As far as how oten to give baths, I would say every night in the summer and no less than every other night in the winter. Once a week is way to long to go with out a bath for any kid and doesn't encourage good hygiene. Only newborns shouldn't take a bath every night. But your youngest is past that so a bath every night wouldn't hurt as long as you lotion him up afterwards. Plus a nice warm bath calms them down for the night. Good luck hope it helps.

Lavender! Lavender! Lavender! ohh and did I say Lavender!....
honestly, there is a baby wash you can buy that has lavender in it, or you can just put a couple drops of the essential oil in the water.
I also put it in a spray bottle of water and spray down bedding and curtains. It works great!
As for how often, I washed my kids daily, just because. My friend washes hers weekly. I think it depends on what they are doing, how dirty they get, and what you feel works best for you.
It is ok to do every other day or every 3 days, or Tue and Sat each week.
I love the idea of setting a schedule, but after 23 years of parenting I still have not accomplished it. My baby is 12, and they have come to realize that mom is just a "free" spirit.
As my friend says, the field I work in (childbirth) seams to attract "free" spirits. She also says that trying to get us together for support groups is like herding cats.... LOL
Anyway, what I am trying to say is don't beat yourself up! You are humane, and it is ok not to be perfect. Do what you are able to do.
Over the years my parenting has changed, when I realized that I could enjoy being a mom and did not have to look perfect in "everything" I did.
It is funny to have my oldest over, whom is 23, and she will see me do something with your younger siblings, and say "what did you do with my mother?"
Good luck, and have FUN...
B.

My kids take a bath or shower every other day (unless they do something to get really dirty and have to have one). A daily bath really dries my son's skin out, especially this time of year. Good luck! S.

Im pg with our 3rd. Right now we give the older 2 a bath every other night. Sometimes its every 3 nights.

Our plan when the baby is here is to switch off nights. It can be kinda crazy with 3 kids in the bath, so we will switch off bath for the baby one night and bath for the older two the next and probably skip 1 night a week.

We do once or twice a day, and have since our son was born.

Showers are for in the morning, bathtime at night. Showers are quick, just a minute or two for rinsing off and waking up, baths are for cleaning and lounging and relaxing before bed.

Two tips from a girl from a large family:

1) Oldest first & babies separate.
Older kids like warmer water...if you're waiting until the end for them, either it's going to be cold, or you're scalding the little ones, or you're going though a ton of water drawing a new bath or heating up the old one.

2) Bath time together.
I would personally put the 2 & 3 year old together in the tub and let them play and splash for as long as you/they like. Have a "calm down" time at the end. Towels, brush teeth, jammas, storytime, bed.

You can do the baby at the same time, IF YOU WANT TO, but in a separate tub. I've always found it easier to do babies earlier, and I'd rather not have the distraction of bathing the baby while watching toddlers...but it can certainly be done. While we owned a "baby-tub" our son was too big for it. We spent 5 bucks and got a big round plastic toy-tub from Target, and bathed him in there once he outgrew the kitchen sink. I always preferred morning baths with infants, and swipes with cloths throughout the day as necessary...and then night baths with toddlers to help calm them down before bed.

<Laughing> And yes! Even though it might not SEEM calming with all that playing and splashing, the warm water actually IS relaxing their muscles. If you stay in long enough, they usually start to act calmer, but even if you take them out in full giggle, their bodies are actually far more ready to go to bed.

Good Luck! Changing schedules is rarely easy!!! :)

During the summer when the kids were getting more grungy because they were out in the garden making mud pies, I used to bathe them every day, winter--every other day.

Things I used to do to encourage sleepiness was bath ,warm coco, story, and hugs.

But my kids were tired. Sports, outside in all weather, and they stopped napping early :( They also went to coop preschool from 2 years old. They never held still.