BF Is Turning Out to Be a Complete Failure! Sad, Need Advise and Help

This site has great tips for increasing milk supply:

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/bf/galact.asp

Hi,
You should try Brewers Yeast flakes. Don't worry about supplementing with formula it is the best thing you can do. I had to do the same thing until my milk supply got better and my son BF until he was about 8 months. He is a healthy, happy 2 year old who hardly ever gets sick.
Best of luck,
J.

I personally would give her formula . She will feel better and so will you. I hope this helps. :) Good Luck.

The more you supplement, the less she takes from you and the less you make. Stop measuring, stop calculating how much she's eating and relax.

Are you starting on the side you last nursed on every time? You need to totally empty the breast and your baby needs the back milk, the last richest bit she gets when you think there's nothing there. By completely emptying your breast you are stimulating it to make more. Then you switch her to the other side. Wear a safety pin on your bra if you need to remind yourself to start on the last nursed side.

Breastfed newborn babies nurse about every hour, sometimes it feels like you are continuously nursing. Breastmilk is easier to digest than formula, so they need to eat more often. Sip a beer, have water and milk, juices. Do a little reading or watch TV, whatever relaxes you so you are not focusing how quanity of breastmilk.

This can work for you and your darling newborn.

Hi C.,
I'm sorry this is working out for you. You're doing the best you can and that's all you can do. There is nothing wrong with doing both Breast feeding and formula. That's what I did. I personally was not making much milk either and I also really hated breast feeding so I went to formula full time after a few weeks. My son is big and healthy and turned out fine. My girlfriend did both as well. I know there is a lot of pressure on woman to breast feed and I know it is beneficial to the baby in ways that formula isn't but the most important thing is that the baby eats enough. There is nothing wrong with using the formula to supplement. Also, the stress isn't good for you or your health and if you are stressed it will not help your milk supply and it will not help you take care of your children.

Pleast try to relax and just go with it. Whatever you need to do to feed the baby - just do it and don't feel guilty if she is getting more formula than brest milk. She will turn out fine either way....

Good luck!

Hi C.,
I'd like to share my experience with you. On the third day after my daughter was born, I had a slight fever. I called the doctor's office, and they asked if my milk had come in yet (it hadn't). They said sometimes you run a fever before your milk comes in. The next morning, my milk came in so I thought that was why I had the fever. On day 5, I woke up feeling horrible and had a fever of 105. I spent that entire day in the emergency room. It turned out I had a urinary tract infection that caused the fever. I pumped before I left for the emergency room, and got about 2.5 oz, which my daughter promptly sucked down. My mother than said she must still be hungry and cracked open the can of formula. The fever made me dehydrated, and I only pumped about 1/2 an ounce while I was in the hospital. We started supplementing with formula after every breastfeeding session. On about day 8, my daughter wouldn't latch on and I had a complete meltdown. I was so upset. I called a bunch of lactation consultants, and one came to my home on a Sunday afternoon. She set me up with a supplemental nursing system (SNS), which is a tube that you tape to your nipple and is connected to a syringe. The theory is that the baby stimulates your breasts to produce more milk while being supplemented through the tube. I also pumped after every feeding session to stimulate my milk production. aT first I only got maybe a 1/4 of ounce, but it gradually built up. After a while, I felt like my daughter was sucking on the tube instead of breastfeeding, so I started nursing her first and then attaching the tube toward the end of the feeding. I stopped using the SNS after a week, and then my LC had me pump for 5 minutes every morning an hour after my daughters first morning feeding to build up an emergency stash of milk. Eventually, I started to get 3-4 oz extra a day that I had stored for when I went back to work. I was able to keep my daughter on breastmilk for a full year, and I donated my excess stash to two other moms through milkshare.org. So have hope, you're not down and out yet.

First of all, I'd recommend that you try to find another LC who is helpful to you. See if you can find one that will set you up with the SNS. Also, please keep in mind that newborns like to suck for comfort. Just because your daughter is taking 3 oz of formula after bf doesn't mean she's not getting any milk from you, it could mean that she just wants to keep sucking and she's getting the formula because she's sucking on the nipple. Has your LC weighed the baby before and after a bf session to see how much she's getting? Also, keep in mind that the pump isn't an accurate measure of how much milk you're producing. Some women respond better to the pump than others, and my guess is that you're so stressed out about this that it's affecting both your supply and your letdown. I like both the kellymom website Susan gave you below and the resources on the La Leche League website.

Don't give up hope!

Finally, if it turns out that your body just won't produce the milk your baby needs, don't stress out about it too much. There are millions of healthy formula-fed babies in the world (including both my nieces and three second cousins). The important thing is that both you and the baby are happy.

http://lllnorcal.org/groups/TulareCA.html

Please call your local La Leche League representative. They give FREE over the phone advice and if their schedules allow it, they might be able to pay you a home visit for FREE. You are not the first person to face this problem.

The best (most efficient) way for babies to get breastmilk is from the breast. The pumping can be difficult and discouraging when you are getting so little.

Another factor is nipple confusion. If she is getting formula from a bottle (which considering the milk delay - supplementation w/ formula may be a necessity) the nipple has a very fast flow (designed that way) so when the baby goes back to the breast, the baby is not used to mom's nipple, which she has to work very hard to get the milk from. So that could be going on too.

http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/bf/index.asp

The best thing might be to keep her at your breast to nurse so she can learn to get milk directly from your breast, and that in turn stimulates your milk supply! It all works like supply and demand. The more your breasts are stimulated, the more it produces, the less it is stimulated, the less you will produce.

Please call a LLL for phone support. Call all the ones in your area until you reach someone. Leave messages. You can also call the national hotline I believe for phone support, advice and encouragement.

http://lllnorcal.org/LocalGroups.html

Try to attend a local meeting. You CAN resume breastfeeding. All hope is not lost. Try not to panic and stress out. Drink liquids, nourish yourself. Is there anyone around to help make nice meals for you?

Here's some helpful links:
http://www.breastfeedingbasics.com/html/increasing.shtml
http://www.babycenter.com/0_low-milk-supply_8487.bc
http://www.breastfeeding.org/faq.html
http://www.storknet.com/cubbies/breast/AS-startingoutrigh...

I'm really sorry to hear of your situation. I know it's not easy.
MAIN thing, is your baby, and that she is getting enough intake. Try drinking more water/liquids as well.

A Baby does lose some weight after birth...but a baby should be back to his birth weight by ten to 14 days after birth. If baby continues to lose weight, then yes, this would be a concern...

No matter what, the health of your baby is the main concern. I say this because, I once baby-sat a baby, that was malnourished... she hardly got enough breastmilk. It affected her overall development,negatively. Her Mom, no matter what, kept on insisting on breastfeeding (even though her output was not enough and her baby was not a good feeder), and she did not want to supplement. All the Mom would say is that her baby did not have a big appetite.

As the baby got older, she had many developmental delays and problems. It could have been avoided, if only the baby got enough intake, whether through breastmilk or formula. She also had gotten dehydrated, twice, before she was even 6 months old.

I warned the parents many times, it was frustrating. I almost wanted to call their Doctor. The baby was just suffering and was in the 'failure to thrive' percentiles. I did not babysit this baby for long... but I know that even now, the child is just not on par, and is very undersized.

You MUST talk to your Pediatrician, and get another Lactation Consultant. BUT, you must feed your baby.
Your output can be increased.... ie: fenugreek, drinking enough water, mother's milk tea, beer, rest, no stress etc. BUT if all fails, you must feed baby somehow.
Your baby gulps down the formula, 3 ounces! She is hungry. This is a cue to you... that she is perhaps not getting enough through breast.

Some say, do NOT give any supplementation at all, for the first few weeks... so ask your Doctor. But if your baby is losing weight and your Doctor is concerned... you must do what is recommended.

Take care, I just wanted to share my personal experience that I had. I know I may not have been very helpful... and some may insist that you keep breastfeeding & not offer Formula... but to me, if breastfeeding/breastmilk is not enough & baby is losing weight markedly... a Mom has to feed a baby no matter what... not under-feed. It has been 10 days thus far. At what cost is breastfeeding just for the sake of bresatfeeding, if meanwhile the baby is starving and not getting sufficient intake? That is worse.

Meanwhile, on-demand direct breast nursing is the best way increase milk supply... but if your milk does not come in and your baby keeps losing weight... then you need to decide what is best for baby. Try to put baby to breast more frequently... and stimulate your milk production that way as well.

A "Mom" is not a 'failure' just because there is difficulty with breastfeeding. A Mom is someone who loves and cares for her baby in any way she possibly can.
Breastfeeding does NOT = "good" Mom. No. Think about all the others who can't or don't breastfeed...that does not make them a "bad" Mom. No. Not at all. I had 2 Cesarean's, and breastfed both my kids because I believe in it & my kids did fine and my milk came in right away... but I am not a "purist" and to me no matter what, the MAIN point is that a baby feeds. Regardless if the nipple is Mom's or a bottle.

Next, what did your Pediatrician say? You need to ask him/her.

All the best,
Susan

C. my dear don't stress yourself out. Its not like you haven't tried. Formula is great nowadays! The same happened to be but all guilt about not being able to bf goes away when you see your baby thrive and satisfied. Its not worth it. There is absolutely nothing wrong with bottle feeding if you don't have enough milk. I did the same thing and was reluctant to bottle feed cos I didn't enough breast milk and my baby ended up in the hospital...dehydrated. Just mix what breast milk you do have with formula to make a meal for your little girl and maybe it will make you feel better about the bottle. Hope this helps. Best to you.

Don't give up. I had trouble with both of my babies. Put her to your breast even if it's only for a short time - each side. Then give her the supplement from the bottle immediately afterwards and get her nice and full. She will get used to that routine and want to have the breast when she's hungry because she ended up content the time before (even if she got most of her food from the bottle). As you continue this routine, the suckling will help your milk come in and you should have more each time, plus she won't be frustrated because of being hungry. As your milk builds up you'll slowly be able to supply all she needs. This worked for me, both times. My babies were losing weight too - and they were frustrated because they were hungry. This routine helps all of those problems and allows you to fill up more and more each feeding!

Another help: it's important for you not to stress or feel guilty! That keeps your milk from coming in as well. If you need to, have a glass of wine - anything like that to help you calm down.(my doctor suggested that and it was great advice!) It's all going to work out - if you'll give it time and patience. Have faith! You're not alone....

its just easier for her to get the formula from the bottle..u need to use a slower flow nipple or jam it up so she'll take to your breasts better..also try nursing in the bathtub in a calm environment..i had a C-sec and have a boob job..breast fed til..um...recently my son is 3..i think u can do it..don't under estimate your breast milk...i still have some ..i was ever a big milk maker either so i compiled this list...hope this helps u..

here is my list on how to up your supply

1. rent a hospital grade pump..Medela Classic is what i used..it's
$3 a day and totally worth it! OR better yet buy one off ebay and
when you're done you can re-sell it on ebay and get your money back.
i bought one and it works great..the medela classic is supposed to be
the best pump out there. i sold mine for $50 more than i paid for it when i was done.
2. get the Easy Expression bra www.easyexpressionproducts.com it
holds both cups over you bb's and it's better to pump 2 at a time
3. eat oatmeal ....get the healthy kind i add bananas also i would
think pasta would be good b/c it retains water
4. Take "Lactation Supplement" by Gaia Herbs you can find it at the
health food store
5. try to pump at the same time every day...also try power pumping..
10 minutes pumping..then stop for 10 then 10 again and then stop and
so on. even pump if you aren't getting anything.
6. Make sure the white membrane thingies that attach onto the cups
are fairly new ..over used ones affect how much milk you get
7. Drink lots of fluids including Nursing Mom's tea or Mother's Milk
tea or the tea i prefer is www.breastea.com ..also drinks with
electrolytes like Recharge...Smart Water...Gatorade i notice on days
i drink a lot of fluids i have more milk
8. Eat barley..Barley Grass supplements are great. also..they have
barley bread at Trader Joe's if you have a Trader Joe's where you
live..or just buy barley. I buy a delicious barley tea at the
japanese market and i drink a couple of cups a day..it's decaf and
yummy.
i also drink Healthy Mom's drinks by Ensure
9.A warm wash cloth helps too ..apply to breasts before pumping or
try the breast heating pads that you heat up in the microwave.
10. Keep taking your prenatal vitamin..not getting a lot of milk
could mean a vitamin deficiency
even if you pump just a little ..save what you get and start adding
them together and then supplement with the milk that you pump..that's
why it's also good to pump after they've gone to sleep..then you help
build your supply and you also have more bb milk for baby..
11. nurse nurse nurse..triple up on nursing..you're going to have to
dedicate a week to it
the more you pump the more milk you'll begin to make.
12. LOTS OF REST..nap if you can ..milk builds when you rest
13. DHA supplements also are great for lactation..also found at the
health food store*
14. Alfalfa supplements are also great.
i think that's it..
15. Try a whey protein powder drink.. i use "Whey to Go" by
Solgar..you mix it with milk add some berries and a banana. it says
to check with your doc before using if you're bfing..so ask your
doc..i only drink one a day and i add a some Motherlove's "More Milk
Plus" to it.
16. Again you should double pump when you're pumping so make sure you
get the bra to make it easier on you!
17. Goat's Rue herb is also supposed to help boost
honestly drink LOTS of liquids
keep yourself moist ...don't take any birth control pills.
18. there is also this stuff called Motilium aka DOM a lot of mom's
use this ..it's for reflux but it builds up your supply.. you can
read about it on Kellymom.com http://www.kellymom.com/newman/19a-
domperidone1.html
and you can buy it here... http://www.inhousepharmacy.com/general/
motilium.html

I had the same issues and frustrations with my daughter! My doctor and family members were really careful to make it seem like it was nothing I was doing wrong, but it only took so long for the guilt to kick in, like it was my fault I couldn't provide for my baby. I eventually gave in and just did the formula thing. It was kinda liberating.
It is so hard because the breatfeeding advocates out there are so pumped up (sorry for the pun) all the time about how awesome breastfeeding is the great benefits your baby will be missing out on if you don't attempt it. You know what, formula babies turn out fine. And for some of us, it just doesn't happen the way we thought it would. You are no less of a mom if you stick to formula and give your poor self a rest from the frustration and disappointment. It is such a short time in your relationship with your child... soon you will be on to another stage and a different kind of bonding with your child. Now that my daughter is two I find that reading books to her is just as satisfying if not more than breastfeeding ever was.
Keep in mind that you have just given birth so all these little issues seem SO HUGE because of hormones. Enjoy your baby. No matter what happens with the breatfeeding, you have a new little being in your family and lots of love and bonding ahead of you. Best of luck.

Dear C.-

I completely feel for you- this happened to me too and it was so heartbreaking. I wept or three weeks, in the shower, when I pumped, and when my baby cried and I couldn't help her.

I wanted to give you some resources that you may not have found-

Jack Newman M.D. is a canadian pediatrician- google him- he is a great advocate for BFing and has videos and will even answer your personal emails. I found him encouraging and also have his book on breastfeeding.

I also used an SNS- not sure if you already tried this- it's a tube that you tape to your breast so your baby can practice latching on while drinking formula. I did this for 2 weeks for a couple of feedings. Honestly it is very stressful but did help me because I knew I was feeding the baby but didn't have to give her a bottle (i worried she would prefer the bottle and never come back).

I found a LC Stella Teachout to be very helpful:

Stella Teachout RN,IBCLC
18853 Nearfield Street
Azusa CA 91702
Phone: ###-###-####
Email: ____@____.com

She spent 2 hours with me at two separate times, observing me, encouraging me. She was a little tough, and I cried a lot, but I do think it helped. She also responded to my emails. She works through the Arcadia Methodist hospital and I think you can see them for $50, not sure though.

Two friends of mine had preemies and couldn't get their babies to latch. Both moms kept pumping for months. And by some miracle, one mom's baby actually latched at 6 months and is still BFing after 1 year!

I know you're not getting much out while pumping, but it does take time and baby is much better than the pump. Plus you are so tired and stressed which makes it even harder. Eventually I was able to pump more than a tablespoon. Oh- one tip that seemed to really help me was to pump WHILE breastfeeding. This was sooo hard to do but resulted in my greatest increase in volume. Much more effective than pumping after, and less time consuming too.

I was blessed to finally be able to breastfeed enough after about 3 to 4 weeks, but it was really tough. In the end you know you are doing your very best and that is what counts. You may end up BFing a little and supplementing the rest and that is just fine. Your love for your baby is the most important. If you do end up switching to a bottle just continue to spend the bonding and cuddling time you would have while BFing- that's irreplaceable.

Hang in there.

1. Sleep whenever your baby sleeps. Rest is key to making milk.

2. Eat nutricious meals every 2-3 hours.

3. Pumping doesn't give you the same let down that a hungry baby will give you. Stop measuring your milk. It'll only drive you crazy.

4. Use active visualization. When you put the baby onto the breast close your eyes and take a deep breath. Picture an overflowing river, only instead of water picture milk just pouring over the rocks. Keep breathing. You can use my image or pick one of your own.

My daughter nursed every hour 24 hours a day for the first 3 weeks of her life taking only one breast at a time. Their stomaches are tiny. The 1st 2 or so weeks are the toughest. Both of you have to learn how to nurse. After the initial learning period, it's smooth sailing.

Try Pump Station in either Santa Monica or Hollywood. It's free professional advice. You can bring your little one in or talk to them on the phone and they'll help you...for FREE.

Please accept the fact you are one of those Mums who can not BF. not every one can,,, I have three children and I could have fed the "nation" but both my sisters....one has 7 children, the other has 6 and neither could BF. My advise is buy your formula,bottles etc and feed her..

You are not a failure. Some ladies just can't breast feed. That does not make them less of a mom or a failure. I tried my hardest to bf and I could not. My LC (she was very good) told me my babies needs come first. So I finally pumped and put my milk in the refrigerator (you can store it in the refrigerator for a certain time period, I forgot how long though) and added it up and gave it to him when I got enough. I had to give him formula in between, he was so hungry. I know it made me feel so bad I couldn't bf, but I know I tried and at least he got a little breast milk by pumping. Since then I have talked to SO MANY ladies who couldn't bf. I wish I could have talked to them at that time. Also it does not matter breast size sometimes it just doesn't work to bf.
Susie

C.,
First of all CONGRATULATIONS on your beautiful bundle of joy!
I had milk supply issues w/ both of my children and did not find out until after the fact that it was quite possible linked to my thyroid issues. (I have had my thyroid removed & take supplements) If you end up not being able to b/f, you are no less of a wonderful mother. Just bottle feed with love! Always hold the bottle for you baby and hold her just like you would if you were b/f'ing; never prop it up or teach her to hold it herself. (if she never learns to hold it, it will be easier to take away later)
Do your best to get some rest and enjoy these moments that are truly priceless!

I am sorry for your emotional stress and pain over this issue. I also could not produce enough milk to feed my baby. My baby was born and left the hospital a few days later, but became severely ill after a few days at home because of not enough intake from me breastfeeding. The LC at the hospital made me feel like a complete and total failure. A wonderful (male) nurse at the hospital told me, "It's not your fault. Don't get so hung up on trying to do this. You need to make a decision of what to do and just go with it." I ended up deciding to use formula with my baby, as I still could not produce enough milk (maybe less than 1 teaspoon on each side.) The whole thing was so stressful. It was more depressing for me to think that I was starving my baby and I worried whether he would gain weight all the time. Just think about what you need to do to keep your baby healthy and strong. This is not your fault. You are being the absolute best mom you can be.

Take care,
J.

I can understand your frustration. The one thing I want to REALLY REALLY stress is a pump is no indication of what is coming out!!! Some people pump a ton, some do not. I breastfed both of my babies - both were c-sections, with both my milk did not officially come in until days later, day #6 with my first, day #4 with my second. Neither starved - yea, they lost weight (but this was monitored by a Dr.) and yea they were on the boob 24/7 but that is where they needed to be to get what they needed and to stay satisfied. I did not supplement. I'm not a Dr., so I'm not telling you to not supplement. I just think to often we rush to give formula when what we have is the best thing. I know it's a lot of work but nursing your new baby on demand, even if she just nursed 20 minutes ago, is the best thing you can do with her right now. Don't watch the clock, watch her. You have a 5yo, imagine having a younger child on top of your new baby. At least your 5yo can help a little/keep herself busy, etc.. If this is what you want, you can do it. Do not think you don't have enough milk. By the way, I rented a hospital grade pump after having my son because I wanted to store some milk - I'd pump for 30 minutes, both sides, first thing in the morning and I was lucky to get an oz. Needless to say, I wasn't able to store any milk. Also, if your LC hasn't been much help than you need a new LC. Stress and being depressed won't help your milk supply. I know it is hard, but please try to take care of yourself. Healthy meals/healthy snacks (have water and nuts at arms reach where you nurse) and drink plenty of water!! With both of my kids, our nursing relationship didn't really get comfortable until the 9 week mark. Give it some time, nurse on demand, get rest, eat/drink and it will all work out. If it doesn't, at least you'll know you tried your best.

Best wishes,
M.

I don't know that I have any great advice, but I am not sure that I will be able to b/f my newborn twins, either. I had no problems with my older daughter, but she was a very easy vaginal birth, latched on right after she was born and I had no problems nursing her.

I just had twins 3 weeks ago, and though we thought I'd be able to go to term and have a vaginal birth again, things didn't go as planned. They were 5 weeks early via c-section and spent 12 days in the NICU. I've been pumping, though not as often as I should because I'm so tired. I've tried them on the breast, but not even every day. They aren't 6 pounds yet, and someone said that makes a difference. Even with pumping, there is no way I'll produce enough milk to satisfy both of them, and I'm still having to add some of the 22 calorie formula to the pumped breast milk (who knew that breast milk is 'only' 20 calories?)

Anyway, we are using the formula for preemies and they are gaining weight very well. The pediatrician is pleased with their progress. I've decided not to worry if they ever take the breast because what matters most is that they are getting the amount of food that they need in order to grow appropriately.

Don't beat yourself up if breastfeeding does not turn out the way you'd hoped. You are not a failure. The important thing is to get your daughter the nourishment she needs. If your LC isn't very helpful, consider finding a new one. (I have yet to consult one, but probably should).

Good luck to you, and again, do NOT beat yourself up over this. I recall when I was at a restaurant with my daughter years ago and on the way out, some ladies stopped me and 'congratulated' me on breastfeeding. Little did they know I was at my wits end because I had to return to work and my daughter still wouldn't take a bottle...no matter what was in it. I wasn't offended, but wondered what they'd say if they had seen me feeding her with a bottle. Sometimes it's a choice, and other times it's what's best for the baby. I think it's very personal and don't like the fanatics who say there's only one way. Do what's best for you and your daughter.

Hi there C.! I haven't read the response below, so my apologies is any of my advice is redundant. I'm in a hurry, but I did want to encourage you. My experience was very similar to yours. I wasn't producing hardly any milk and was really sad that my daughter would not want to breastfeed, because for a few days she was supplemented with formula. However, in time (a few days, which felt like forever!), my milk came in and within a few days we were 100% breastfeeding! The stress, the exhaustion and the delay in milk all added to my frustration.

However, asking for lots of help from your hubby, friends and family will help you rest. Drink lots of water. I also took some herbal supplements, the Motherlove, More Milk Plus capsules & they helped tremendously. They make a liquid also, but it tastes bad, so I would go with the capsules if you have a choice. Otherwise, mix the liquid with some strong juice or something & take it like a shot. I also think I took them around the time that I started to relax and not worry so much.

If your little girl needs some formula, that is okay! I remember feeding my daughter a bottle of formula at the doctor's office and feeling guilty like everyone was looking at me. I almost wanted to announce "I'm breastfeeding, this is just a supplement." My lactation consultant was so encouraging and supportive, and did not frown on me giving the baby a little formula if it meant me relaxing, resting (well, as much as possible), and working towards 100% breastfeeding. She also told me, pump your breasts as if you have twins. Lastly, I would every morning pump on the opposite breast as I was nursing her on the other breast. This helped build my supply lots and I stored a bunch in my freezer. That was great for when I went back to work!

Best of luck to you! I am completely confident that you will soon be writing us all to tell us that you are successfully breastfeeding your little girl with no problems at all! You can do it!

Not sure where you are, but the bf nurses are great at the Providence hospitals - St. Joseph's and its sister one on Rinaldi...both my boys had to supplement with formula at the beginning due to complications (long story) but those nurses helped. What worked for both boys was a feeder tube. I managed to squeeze enough milk out to put a little in a syringe. I put the baby to the breast and the feeder tube in at the same time and they thought they were getting the milk from the breast. Then they started to really suck and stimulate the milk production. Supplement with formula, but every time she gets formula, try to express some milk, maybe even by hand, so you have for the feeder syringe. While you pump/hand express, RELAX, look at her and smile, and just say to youself, "Come on milk!" Strange, but it does help.

That sounds really rough! Maybe it will be difficult for you to get back to exclusive BFing, but if you continue to keep up at least a little supply of your own, your baby will still get the benefits of BFing. It sounds like you're doing everything you can. don't beat up on yourself and hang in there!

C., my response is a little long but I've been there!!! Good luck...

You're doing your best and don't give up yet! Feed as often as you can but try (I say try--I know that is hard because I stressed out anyway) try not to stress out about the milk supply because it will only decrease it. With my first son I was able to "breastfeed" (I put that in parenthesis because I breastfed and pumped but I always had to supplement--I think that at my best I was able to pump 3.5 ounces!) I stressed out so much about it and always felt like a failure and cried and drove my husband crazy! :( With my second son I had to go back to work after six weeks so I was pumping full time and still (without feeding before) and my milk was even worse (only got 1-2 ounces) and I stopped producing milk completely at about 4 or 5 months (not that it was much anyway). I had to tell myself that I could be a good mom and that my baby would be fine even if he some formula and not 100% breastmilk! I tried Fenugreek and Blessed Thistle (herbal remedies/pills) and neither worked for me! :(

For you I'll tell you what I did with both of my kids. I fed them on both sides till I was dry and then supplemented with a bottle. Neither of them ever thought twice about formula. Do whatever you need to do to keep your kid happy and not leave him hungry. He'll still get the good stuff from you and the additional nourishment that he needs from the formula. My 2nd kid loved the Kirkland Formula (it has the from Costco (19.99 for two 25.7 oz cans)--it's the cheapest that I can find and it matches up with Similac's Advance Infant Formula http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/237515/similac_a...

Good luck in whatever you decide! Keep breastfeeding if you can! Keep pumping if you can! You're doing great! Even if it doesn't work at all YOU ARE STILL A GOOD MOM and you produced a beautiful child! I see some of my friends who can't get pregnant (and I feel awful for them) but when I feel the most down about not being able to breastfeed I tell myself, at least I've been blessed to be able to have nice healthy babies! They both survived on formula even though I was heart broken and are super tall and healthy now!

p.s. I just read some people that said that if you just nurse more and more and more that you will make more milk. I nursed and nursed and nursed until I bled, took every supplement that promised to help you make more milk, drank more water, pumped every time after feeding to "increase" my milk, and then finally figured out that not everyone makes enough! It took my 87 year old grandma to tell me that (she didn't make enough milk either) because EVERYONE else was telling me that I just needed to feed more or that I was crazy or not holding him right or something and I cried about having to give him formula for FOUR months! You do what you need to do to feed your kid. He will love you no matter what and will grow fine! And you are doing your best and that is good enough!!! Your worth as a mom isn't based on whether your body is like other's whose bodies produce sooooo much milk! Good luck!

I,too, just wanted to add a word of encouragement to you. Keep going!! No matter what you guys are bonding and that is important when you breastfeed. Also, drinks TONS (double or triple what you normally drink) of water, eat A LOT of protein and just keep going at it........

Kudos to you for even sticking with it!!!!!

Congrats on your baby!!!!

I would try renting a more powerful pump that was all that worked for me no store brought one worked but the rented one which is to expensive to buy did wonders. I also had to pump and nurse about every hour until I produced more milk the more you did it the more you produce. Best of luck to you and your baby.

Formula babies do great. There is no real science to prove that they don't. Why wear yourself out when you need to do so much for your children and husband?
Enjoy your little one and see how much the family love giving the bottle to the baby.
B. v.O.

The amount you get pumping is not necessarily indicative of how much milk the baby gets - until I went back to work and was away from my baby and not nursing at all, I got almost nothing when I pumped. Supplementing with formula, though necessary somtimes, really hinders your milk supply, especially in the early weeks. You need a good lactation consultant who is really committed to breastfeeding to get you back on track. With respect to fenugreek - my pediatrician recommended taking 13 tablets the first dose - a huge amount - to kick start the milk. go to kellymom.com for more ways to increase milk, there are many things you can do, including pumping ever couple of hours to stimulate the milk. But don't give up at this stage - you just need apropriate help. Also, try to stay relaxed about this - stress will only hinder your milk supply. And remember, as you know by now with your 5 year old - there is so much more to being a good mommy than breastfeeding.

I know exactly what you are going through, and it is really hard. I actually gave up breastfeeding because my son wasn't getting enough, I got mastitis, and I was going on no sleep, so I couldn't think clearly. I actually decided to relactate a month later because I wanted to bf, and it has been great ever since, so don't give up. I think you should get a nursing supplementer, that way your daughter stimulates you and can get formula at the same time. You probably won't need it very long, but you can build up your supply, and stay away from bottles (which just mess up your supply more since you aren't actually bfing). I got the Medela SNS, but there is also the Lactaid Nursing supplemented, either will work.

One more thing, being depressed and stressed hurts your supply, as well as not eating enough or drinking enough fluids. I know it's hard to let go, but I had no let down for maybe a week because of stress, once I was able to relax, things worked much better.

Good luck!!

Hi C.,

Please do yourself and your daughter a favor, accept that BF is not working, and buy formula so that the baby gets her nutrition. In no time at all both you and her will be relaxed and happy. This should be a time of enjoyment not a time of worry and frustration over something that may not happen.

For my first, I was able to feed for 5 months; for my second, 1 month. Of course I would have liked to BF for 1yr+ because of the benefits to the baby, but the crying from the hungry babies, was more than I could bear and I had to accept that I had to be content on what I could do.

Whatever you decide, good luck!

Hi! I know everyone is different, but i thought i would share (: I had a c/s as well, and took me about 6 days as well to get milk in. Then when it was finally in abundance, she would not latch on. I was so distressed. I saw the lac. nurse at the pediatricians office and it was a simple issue such as positioning. Point being that night i almost gave up i was so distraught. But i was so thankful to hold on just a little longer....as when i was the problem was solved. I personally like the hand pump. I felt like i got more out faster. Of course to mch reptitious hand movement can cause i carpal tunnel like feeling. Don't give up yet. Take a deep breath and be patient. Make it a sweet time instead of a time of dispair/frustration. Remember, it is supply and demand-maybe your let down time lags a little, keep her on the breast and if she is hungry, she will stimulate that milk production. Best of luck!

I just wanted to write a note of encouragement because I had the same frustrations at the beginning. Don't feel like a failure! It's okay if you need to supplement with formula, what's important is that she's getting enough to eat and also she's at least getting some benefit from the breastmilk that she IS getting. I just wanted to encourage you though because often you get less pumping than your baby is able to get nursing because your body doesn't respond the same way to the pump. So, she may be getting more than you think. I had the same thing, barely ANYTHING coming out with the pump and I was very frustrated. My milk did increase and although it was a rough start I was able to breastfeed my daughter until she was 11 months old. I took Fenugreek too. I'd keep taking it since it can't hurt. I don't know if this helps at all. I hope so. Keep trying!!---nurse practitioner and fellow mom

I'm going to second something that may be unpopular: if you're not an alcoholic, try having a beer or glass of wine right before and while you're BF.

Stress is radiating off of you honey. Many countries (industrialized, everyone goes to college type countries, we're NOT talking back woods third world) actually tell new mothers to sip on a beer when they first start nursing, precisely because they want the new mothers to relax, because relaxing -whether it's conscious, or with the aid of a mild depressant, like a beer- is reeeeeally important for milk production. (It is durn near physiologically impossible for your body to absorb it and add it into your milk if you do the two things together, btw.) Now remember, if you're taking shots...now that's a problem...and that's not what I'm suggesting either.

Stress sends your body into sympathetic nerve response...aka run faster then the bear/lift a car off of your toddler. The adrenaline shuts down your parasympathetic nervous system...the one that has to do with digestion, healing, NURSING, etc. Parasympatheic is "rest and digest" ...Sympathetic is "fight or flight". You DON'T want your body to be in fight or flight...is dilates your pupils/speeds up your heartrate/alters your breathing/pulls you blood into your core (so you don't bleed as much if the bear gets a piece of you)...and makes nursing durn near impossible unless you turn out to be milkmaid of the year...and then, take it from me, you STILL have problems.

It's the BANE of working nursing mothers. They run around getting ready for the meeting, race in, sit down, relax an iota and BOOM. They're leaking like Niagara falls. Sooooo not cool.

So R.E.L.A.X.

Ditto on:

- Having a LC weigh him before/after feeding.
- Consider a SNS
- STOPPING on measuring.
- Sleep whenever your baby sleeps.
- Eating nutritious meals every 2-3 hours.
- Use active visualization.
- STOP telling yourself that you're failing.
- Nursing does NOT make a mother. Caring for your child and doing your best, does. It it sooooooo not the end of the world if your body just says "Nope. Huh-uh. Not going to happen." :)

Last few words of encouragement.

My son at 9 days took an average of 21oz per feeding.

Which I know because he'd lost weight, cried for "more" (ahem, turned out to be more chewing on mummy time), and I couldn't express or pump more then a few tablespoons. I literally remember crying when I knocked the little bag over and they spilled.

I know he took so much, and took so much on AVERAGE...because I saw a darn good lactation consultant, who weighed him before and after, at different times through out the week. He'd swallow for 5, chew on me for 15-20. Go figure.

In the end 2 lactation consultants cried because I couldn't donate. Still, to the last day, I could NEVER pump more then half an ounce. But in the beginning I was in tears...right EXACTLY where you are.

I feel for you. I had the same problem with one of my sons. What ended up working great for me was using something called Domperidone. My lactation specialist recommended it and my gyno prescribed it to me. I took four capsules a day. When I pumped before taking Domperidone, I would get less than an ounce. After a few weeks of being on it, I was able to pump 4-6 oz. It was amazing. Also to start producing more, I would nurse and then pump right after for 10 min. I did this for weeks, but it all worked out in the end. If you still need to supplement, there is something called a SNS and you put formula into the bottle and put it around your neck. There is a tiny tube that you put into your baby's mouth while nursing and she will get both breast milk and formula at the same time. This saves you time and stimulates more milk production. After you milk is established when your baby is 6 weeks old, you don't have to continue with all of this craziness. This was a lot of work, but worked out great. If you have any questions email me and I will try to help you out the best I can.

How often are you feeding? With bf it is all about supply and demand. Feed whenever baby will take the breast and that means every hour during the day if necessary. That is the best way to increase your supply that I know of. Also you need to drink LOTS of fluids especially water. Try drinking a full glass each time you breast feed.

Hi C.,
Silly question, but have you increased the amount of water your drinking (approximately a gallon or more per day)? Many women do not drink near enough water (and are dehydrated)thus they are not producing enough milk.

I had the same experience with my 6 year old. I had literally no milk. It is vital that you supplement with formula because it is extremely detrimental to their health and development if they are not receiving proper nutrition. I tried everything: consulted a lactation specialist, pumped like crazy, mother's milk tea, fenugreek, i drank tons of water, i even tried acupuncture & herbs that she gave me. I did end up giving him about 12 ounces of breast milk a day but that still wasn't enough and had to continue supplementing. I believe it was the pumping and the acupuncture that helped the most. You do need a heavy duty hospital grade pump, i rented mine from the lactation specialist. I did not take the fenugreek for long because it made everything, including my infant, smell like maple syrup and I learned that it is not completely safe - there are risks, including heart problems so it is not worth it. It was such a tough experience so I know how you feel but ultimately, the most important thing is that you have a healthy baby. Good luck.

I had the same problems, it was so hard for me and by week 6, if you can persevere, you'll get there! Here's what to do:

The best thing, above fenugreek and the teas, which did nothing for me...More Mother's Milk tincture (Whole Foods). Take it on an empty stomach, 4 times a day, with a tiny sip of water...then after 20 minutes, you'll be guzzling water until the next time you take it.

Also, eat tons of brown rice and slow cook steel cut oatmeal. super nutritious, full of fiber and will help produce more milk.

Its the doctor's job is to make sure your baby is gaining weight so they will tell you to supplement. Only problem is if you supplement, you're not increasing demand from your milk production. So, I just left my daughter on each side for about 30 min each side...and pumped the other side while she was on one side. It's so annoying and unpleasant, but takes about a week of this to really build up your supply. Once you get there, you'll probably only need to take the herbs (tincture), but you shouldn't have to pump like a crazy person after a week. After two weeks of this, I went from pumping about 1/2 oz total to about 4 oz total (in the early weeks) and at the height of it was getting like 7 oz...so it did actually work. But, it's very difficult, a big committment.

Once you get there, it gets much easier!

Good luck and hope this helps!

try drink tea hot or cold also try putting a heating pad or something like that on your breast.

Frustration and depression are not going to let your body relax long enough to make the milk that she needs. Give yourslef a break. Try some "Mother's Milk" tea, kick your feet up and latch that baby on. Let her go to town all day long if necessary. I wish I had taken my own advice when my son was born. Good luck!

C-section moms notoriously have a hard time breastfeeding - something they don't tell you before the surgery. Here's some ideas:

1. Get Mammary PMG from Stanard Process and start taking it immediately.
2. Flush out the liver gently from all of the drugs given to you and allow your body to work right - taking Mother's Milk tea.
3. Milk thistle might help - just 1-2 each day
4. Increase your water intake
5. Relax and get yourself a GOOD lactation consultant
6. Remember that pumps are not as efficient as babies. I never got even an ounce the first 3 weeks, but the baby was growing. GET THE BABY TO LATCH ON AND STOP USING THE PUMP. Nurse the baby every 20 minutes if necessary - Demand and supply.

Dark beer may increase the milk supply, but wine will dry you up.

Hi, C.,

I think that it helps to realize that all mothers' bodies and preferences are different and all babies' bodies and preferences are different. I'll provide the feeding of my two babies as an example.

My situation with my first child was similar to your situation. After six months of struggling to nurse my firstborn, I finally let him drink (formula only) from just the bottle. He became a happier baby. If I had it to do over again, I would have let him get all his sustenance from a bottle from day one. Everyone would have been more relaxed. I could have spent the time I pumped tiny amounts of milk and struggled to breastfeed him reading to him and playing with him, which would have helped his development at least as much. if not more, than receiving milk from me.

My second child practically crawled up to my breast as soon as I was sewn up after my second c-section. 17 months later he is still on the breast. I didn't do anything special to try to produce milk or get him to latch on. I wish that he wasn't quite so attached as the attachment is making it hard for me to do anything else, such as study and do research.

The following might also help you put things in a more global perspective: in my mother's country, Vietnam, not long ago, poor women who couldn't breastfeed and couldn't get wet nurses had to give their newborn babies cows' milk, which contained elements which were not very healthy for babies, or a "milk" made of a strained mixture of rice and water, which lacked nutrients which were important to babies' development. In many poor countries, even now, babies die of malnutrition because they can't get enough milk from their mothers and they can't get formula, food, or clean water. At least here, as far as I know, virtually all babies can get human milk or formula. Your baby, even without another drop of human milk in her life, will probably have a healthier childhood than the vast majority of people on this planet.

Good luck,
Lynne E

Perhaps you can try and find another LC that could be more helpful. BF was a partial succes for me with my twins. I never did have enough milk. If you really want to do it, I would recommend nursing (every 2-2.5 hours)then giving your daughter a bottle. She will work harder if she is hungry. Also, make sure she is latching properly - if LC is no help look up the LaLeche league in your area. Once she is fed, pump for 10 min whether there is milk or not. This routine helped me get enough milk that I could feed 50/50 breastmilk formula for my twin girls for about 5 months. Something is better than nothing so take comfort in that. Also, if it is just stressing you out it is OK to decide to stop trying and go with formula. You have to do what works for you and the most important thing is feeding your little one. Try to relax, make sure you sleep as much as you can, eat well - need about 500 extra calories and drink plenty of water. If you are in the LV,NV area you might try contacting the Greenspun women's center - they have some good LCs there! Good luck!

When my daughter was first born, we had issues with her eating enough (I too had a c/s, but I'm not sure how much that affected her). My milk came in by day 4, but she wasn't latching on and ended up hospitalized for jaundice. While I was there, I was pumping and only getting about one oz. at a time (total from both breasts), but the nurses said that was fine (they don't need as much breastmilk as they do formula). I was having to feed her every two hours on the dot just to keep her weight up. It took over 2 weeks for her to finally latch on and nurse. They were the most frustrating 2 weeks of my life! But once she got it, it couldn't have been easier.

My point is, even though my issues were not the same as yours, I have heard of some moms and babies taking up to a month to finally figure out the whole nursing thing. It can be hard and frustrating, but keep at it. Unless you have an issue with your horomones, your body should produce enough milk for your little one, it just might take some time. Keep pumping and your supply will increase. In the meantime, don't beat yourself up if you do supplement a little with formula.

Good luck!

-M.

I don't know where u r located but u need a good lactation consultant. if you are in so cali, try the breastfeeding clinics with susan orr in torrance (healthlinks at torrance memorial - sat. & mon. 9a) or long beach (long beach memorial). there is the pump station in santa monica area.
susan or the pump station can refer u to a good lc to come to your house. it isn't cheap but it really helps.
neither of my girls nursed well at first.
if your nipples are very sore and turning white when she tries to nurse, her latch is too short and she is literally cutting off her own supply and sending the message to your breasts to make less milk. that happened to me.
and it is very true that the pump is not a good indicator of milk supply - a newborn infant who is suckling normally will draw easily 2x the amount you can pump.
keep trying the nursing, check the condition of your nipples after each try and don't keep her on there if it feels like she is pinching - she is learning the wrong way. pump every time you give her the bottle to keep your supply up. fenugreek coupled with 15 min of pumping 4-6x a day will really help the supply issue. and the lc can get the latch fixed.
a good lc is so worth the $.

Hi C.

I am so sorry you are going through this. PLEASE find another lactation consultant who really works with you.
I had a c section too and didn't have enough milk and had to supplement as well.

I never did produce enough milk to stop the supplemental formula, but my son's immune system seems to be strong. Also, I kept breastfeeding him until he was almost 18 months old, but I still had to supplement.

You are not a failure. Trust me, I have been where you are and you are doing the best you can. Your body has gone through a lot and you need to have some compassion for yourself.

Do you have a close friend or mom or sister who can help out a few hours a day? That would really help.

I didn't have anyone close who could help so I ended up getting a post-partum doula for a week. She was a God-send.

I wish you all the best.
Please take care of yourself.

R.

C.,
Drink tons of water. Try not to stress too much.
(Good dark beer is a time honored natural method and it actually does help and helps with the stress too! Not if you have an alcohol problem though, obviously...)

La Leche League is an excellent resource at LLLI.org it is mother's helping other mothers with breastfeeding issues. It has been around for a long time and is FREE too. There are meetings you can attend (FREE) and get to know other cool moms with kids your age near you. Many playgroups, babysitting co-ops and long term friendships have developed from these meetings. 17 years later my son is still best buddies with a friend he met through LLL and we moms are still tight too!

Everything will be okay. Really.

Bright Blessings Beautiful, Loving, Caring Mommy,
Deb

ok first of all you have to relax and STOP telling yourself that you're failing.. or BF is failing. That is only making it worse for you. Like the other poster said... drink lots of water... nothing with caffeine in it and take no form of decongestants. You must also eat... right now is not the time to be worrying about losing weight, if that is a concern at all. Make sure you are consuming AT LEAST 40 - 30- 30 = 40 complex carb, 30 protein 30 fat. You want the milk to have a decent amount of fat in it.
For me, pumping made me dry up so as hard as it has been to be the only one to be able to get up in the middle of the for the last 14 months, it has been worth it to be able to never have my son on formula (except for the first week while my milk came in). I would pump for over an hour and get only about 1-2 ounces so I feel your frustration. Pumping is not a natural sensation to the breast so until your body is producing enough, WHICH IT WILL, then don't pump. Let her nurse as often as she wants.. no schedule at 10 days old. Let her nurse first and then if you still have to give her formula ... do so, but you want to make sure she nurses frequently. I used to let my son nurse every hour in the beginning to get my supply up.
I also used mother's milk tea by traditional medicinal. It worked better than just fenugreek.

Good luck and don't despair! It will happen

I had my first baby in Germany almost 50 years ago, (I was an exchange student), and it was unheard there of not to breastfeed. She was born with multiple disabilities, including cleft lip and palate, so could not nurse. There, all new mothers drank beer. I didn't drink beer, but instead drank lots and lots of milk and other liquids, ate yogurt -- anything with protein and calcium, and pumped. Eventually, I was feeding three babies in the neonatal ward with my milk and the German nurses were disappointed when we sailed for home! They had been quite scornful of my small size. After that, I refused to let the hospitals in the USA give my new babies anything until I started to nurse, and none of them starved.

I thought the people with the ideas of beer or wine to relax, and the feeder tube sounded good. At any rate, lots of liquids and pumping to increase milk supply may help. The more the baby can taste your milk and not get used to something else, the more successful you will probably be.

S. Toji

The same thing happened to me after my daughter's birth - I bled too much and had trouble making milk. No full breasts, no little milk coming, little one crying and hungry, the whole thing. My advice to you is to keep trying. I did and my milk came in fully within about three to four weeks (It may have been longer, I can't really remember). I remember how sad and upset I was too, so I truly understand, and feel for you! I hope you can try to relax a little bit and know that your body will eventually do what it knows how to do. I took fenugreek religiously, ate well. I did pump a lot, too, to stimulate the supply. Don't give up! I was able to switch fully to breastfeeding and breastfed my daughter for...well, years. (3 or 4) I don't want you to have any regrets or feel as though you gave in to pressure from other people to do something you don't want to do. Supplement her (maybe look into goat's milk?) and get on a system of pumping and nursing, and be patient, it will happen! Good luck to you!

I'm so sorry that you're having such a difficult time with breastfeeding. I was there with you with my first child. With both my deliveries, my milk took about 6 days to come in and was very slow to pick up to their demand. I felt like I was the only one with this problem as others seemed surprised that my milk wasn't in yet!

I was very determined with my first, and with the help of a good lactation consultant and a hospital grade breast pump, I managed to feed him well for 10 months. He was supplemented with formula for several weeks early on and then again when I returned to work. Really, he was only exclusively breastfed for 1-2 months. It was a constant struggle, but I am so glad I persisted. I too became frustrated because I would get nothing when I pumped after feeding him and he also was still hungry. In retrospect, I think he was very effective at sucking me dry which is a good thing for increasing supply. I pumped after on the advice of my LC, this may not be the correct thing for you. I worked under the assumption that the pumping after was for the purpose of continuing to stimulate my breasts to produce more and tried really hard to not look at how little was being pumped, even to the point of covering the bottles with a towel while I pumped.

I resolved to supplement and do the best I could. After several weeks and one weekend of just lying around in bed with him, feeding constantly and power pumping, my supply caught up with his demand. However, because of the difficulties I had with him, I did not go through the same thing when I had my twins. For them, I pumped for 9 weeks and decided to move on and provide them with formula. Amazingly, my supply was much better with them, not just because there were two, and I contribute this to the fact that I was at peace with my choice and didn't stress at all about sometimes needing to supplement them with formula. I realize telling someone to relax is probably not too helpful, since then she becomes tense about not relaxing...Anyway, trust that your body knows what to do and that with time and work, you can have a great breastfeeding relationship with your baby, in whatever form that takes (exclusively or supplemented). Needing to supplement does not equal failure. It's just taking a bit longer than may be "typical" for your body to catch up to your daughter's demand. Contact help to make sure that you're doing the best you can to up your supply and then just try to go with it.

I wish you the best and please do not think that you are failing when your supply does not keep up with her demand. There are options out there and, even if supplemented, you can have a great breastfeeding experience with your daughter. Even after having to supplement quite a bit in the early weeks, I finally was able to exclusively breastfeed for awhile. I believe this would have continued if I hadn't returned to work full-time. Sending good thoughts your way.

Go online QUICK and find a good lactation nurse through your hospital or a Le Leche League group. You don't want to miss out on bf. Act soon before you can't get your supply up. However, rest, eat and drink ALOT and your supply should come. It's all supply & demand, so the more you supplement, the less you'll produce. Also remember, you never pump what the baby can suck, pumping is always less. So even if you pump one ounce, the baby may have been able to suck 4.... Good luck.

I'm local if you'd like more help.
____@____.com

My daughter ate every half hour for half an hour for the first couple of weeks. All they do for the first couple of weeks is eat sleep and poop. Leave her on one side for at least 20 min a feeding. I remember being shocked at how much time is involved in bf. I would just feed my daughter on one side at a time, to start, but like I said, she ate every 30 min. The she started to want both sides a feeding, so we did that.
Relax. Put some nice music on, put your feet up, watch tv, read a book, gaze at your child in wonder, whatever... After 30 min you can either switch sides, or (if she is done <limp baby>) pump. You won't get much out of the side she has eaten on. You may not get much out of either side to start. relax, if you pump right after she has eaten it is not a big deal.
Drink lots of water. If you want 4 oz of milk drink 8 oz of water, 4 for you 4 for her... I had an 8 oz cup ever hour to make sure I was drinking enough. Limit caffine. Alchol may help you relax, but it is not good for her, skip that...
You may not be able to bf exclusively, but any amount of bfing is better than non. If you need to give her a bottle, do it. You can talk to your doctor about maybe offering her the formula like three times a day. Not after every feeding...
try not offering a pacifier for a couple of days. if she is awake and fussing, give her the boob. she may just want to suck for comfort, and it will help to stimulate your milk
anyway, good for you for trying. bf as long as you want, even if you supplement with formula, you are doing what you can.
good luck
R.

After you nurse her, pump both sides for a good 10-15 mins. even if you aren't getting very much. Continue to pump for an additional few minutes after the last drops so that you stimulate your glands to produce more. You can also try taking More Milk Plus and Goat's Rue, both available in capsule form from www.motherlove.com
You may need to spend a good 40 mins. on each side in the beginning to get a proper latch and for her to stimulate the letdown.
My son was premature and he was tube and bottle fed in NICU. I too did not get much when pumping, but I kept doing it and kept tring to breastfeed him when he got home. I take both the Goat's Rue and the More Milk Plus. I eventually rented the hospital grade pump and continue to double pump up to eight times a day. This in addition to nursing him on demand. He is now almost 4 months old and we are suplementing him about 1/3 of his daily intake, but I will continue doing this for as long as necessary. Don't forget, some breastmilk is always better then none. Keep up the good work. It's hard, but worth it.

Hi C.,

I was in your EXACT situation last year when my son was born. I remember feeling so disappointed, like I had done something wrong, like I was going to fail my son before his life really began... You are NOT a failure!

I took a supplement called Mother's Milk from Henry's. It has fenugreek, as well as other herbs. It was expensive, but it worked better than fenugreek alone. I also ate oatmeal for breakfast every morning. That seemed to help, too!

When my son was 2 weeks old, my mom, my grandma, and my aunt all told me that I had done my best, but that no one would judge me if I quit. They were so supportive, but I REALLY wanted to BF, so I kept going. Every time my son took a bottle, I timed it, and I immediately pumped for that long + 3 minutes. It was exhausting, and sometimes I pumped 10 times a day and got a grand total of 3 ounces, but by the time my son was 2 months old, I could almost go all day without supplementing! When I returned to work, my supply diminished quickly, but I was ultimately able to BF for 8 months.

Remember, even a little breast milk is better than no breast milk. My son got breast milk AND formula for his first 8 months, and he's healthy and happy-- and (finally!) so am I.

That being said, there IS a breaking point, where trying to BF becomes so stressful for you that it's not worth it. Formula is great! BF is great! Combine them, choose one, whatever you decide - you're a great mom, and no one can judge you for that.

Hope this helps!

Take a deep breath, calm down. You need to be relaaaaaaxed for breast milk to come. Are you eating enough? It takes 500 calories to make a days worth of breast milk, in addition to what you need for yourself. Some people are unable to lose weight while breastfeeding, so put losing weight on the back burner. Are you drinking enough? You should never feel thirsty. Drink a little bit all day long. And stay in bed for a weekend and do nothing but nurse on demand, read, sleep, or watch TV. Let someone else do all chores and answer all phones. This is what I learned from La Leche League when my boys were little. It also (the weekend in bed not burning calories) works for bringing back a milk supply that is drying up. I never had a lot of milk, (no spraying out of the opposoite side, no leaking), but it was enough. I have been told the pump only gets about half as much as the baby gets, so relax...Sounds like you are just too nervous to let down. Find a La Leche League representative near you. I think their advice is free. Good luck. Your body is made for this, it won't let you down. B.

I haven't read the other responses, but my words of advice are this:
Don't assume that you are ONLY making the amount of milk that you can pump out. No pump is as effective as your baby nursing.

I would recommend drinking TONS of liquids and staying at home for a day or two JUST nursing as much as possible.

Good luck.

Hi Kathy,
I can only imagine how frustrated you must feel. You are not a failure! Breastfeeding may seem like the most natural thing but it takes so much work and many moms out there are simply not able to. Don't beat yourself over it. It takes time for you to be able to build up to pumping a larger amount of milk when you first start. Some women have boobs that can do it instantly and others it take some time. The stress and the depression can also hinder lactation as well. Continue to pump, bf, and supplement and one day you'll be a natural at it. I absolutely agree with all the moms that recommended the La Leche League! Good luck and hang in there!

C.,

Go to www.kellymom.com and seach "low milk supply" it is a comprehensive list of everything I've seen folks do to increase their milk supply. It has info on everything from pumping to herbs to medications to stimulate supply.

Keep in mind that pumping is both an art and a science. Even with a full and abundant milk supply, if you've never pumped you aren't going to get much until your body gets used to the stimulation of the pump. If you are determined to pump, get an Easy Expressions Bustier or Halter (you can get them off ebay pretty cheap) to allow you to pump both sides at the same time hands free. I pumped for both of my kids for 16 months (I work full time, I breastfed both of them at home) and the only way to do any significant amount of pumping is to do it hands free. You need to start pumping regularly (like every 3 hours around the clock) and you need to double pump for at least 30 minutes. There is a yahoo group called 'PumpMoms' that you'd probably find helpful too.

Good luck,
T.

Hi C.,

I found myself in a similar position, please give Corky a call at the Pump Station in Santa Monica, if anyone can help they can. Both of the ladies that own the place are RN's who have been doing this for more than 20 years. She help me and I just feel that you should give her a call.

C.,

Have you had any kind of surgery that could have caused your milk ducts to be severed (i.e., breast augmentation surgery)? This will cause this problem.

I had this exact issue with my son who is now 10 mos old. I was heartbroken to learn I could not give him enough milk to survive and I also had bought the Medela PSI..we also rented a hospital grade breast pump which works better than any store bought version but I saw that I was getting less than 2 tspns per side per 30 minute breast pump session so my doctor told me to give up, get over it, and move on. I had to immediately switch to Enfamil Nutramigen formula for my baby and after about 2 months I felt less guilty and less like a failure as a mother to feed my son. He is a healthy, happy baby boy now at 10 months and his bond with me is very, very strong so please...stop worrying and do yourself and your baby the favor of switching to formula and supplement with lots of cuddles and kisses! Your baby will not remember this formula vs breastmilk stage and will gain weight as she should.

If you are worried at all about the quality of formula vs the nutritional value of breastmilk, my son's father is an ER nurse who has found that feeding our baby from 6 mos on with " Nature's One Baby's Only Organic" formula, supplemented with a separate dose of "Nature's One Baby's Only Essentials DHA & ARA" has really helped build our baby's nutrient intake to be the best we could find that was closest to breastmilk. He is now in the 97th percentile heightwise and is developing normally weightwise and mentally.

Hope this helps. Good luck.

I am so sorry you are having this tough issue. I can completely relate. I can tell you that my milk supply was never good enough to breast alone. I came to realize after my 2nd son that it's not an all or nothing situation. I breastfed as much as I could and used a bottle/sns for the rest of the feeding(s). Whatever you can give to your daughter as far as breastmilk is concerned, you are doing her a huge favor. Keep going with the Fenugreek and your l/c might have some additional herbs that might kick things into gear here soon. There are other things that might help! Hang in there mama!

Have you thought about trying acupuncture? I am an acupuncture student and I have seen first hand that it works very well for increasing milk supply. It worked for me when I was nursing. If you can't afford it or aren't interested in it, I highly recommend a good shoulder massage. There are acupuncture points at the highest point of the top of the shoulders- have someone massage around there, then push straight down on the most tender spot, then as they are pushing into the muscle, rub around a little. This is acupressure, and these points are great for stimulating lactation. Do this as often as possible.

There are also points on the pinky finger (I know it seems like a weird place, but it is known as the "empicical point" for lactation). The points are located on both pinkys, at the level of the base of the nailbed, then slightly off to the outside of the finger. You could just sortof pinch that spot, poke it with a fingernail, toothpick, etc. Any stimulation will help.

Good luck to you,
A.

How quicking can you get in to see a lactation consultant? Remember, PUMPING SHOULD NEVER BE USED AS AN INDICATOR OF SUPPLY!!!! EVER! I exclusively nursed my baby and after nursing, I could NEVER get more than a few drops out!!! Here's some info that I posted on my website that might help:

How do I know if my nursing baby is getting enough milk?
Sometimes moms worry that their babies aren’t getting enough milk at the breast. It can be hard to hear that swallowing sound on some babies, and sometimes babies can seem fussy leading moms to suspect that their milk supply isn’t adequate. It can certainly be tempting to turn to a bottle and measure how many ounces a baby is taking, but this really isn’t necessary and can impact the breastfeeding relationship if the bottle is introduced too early. Below are some ways to tell if your breastfed baby is getting enough milk:
http://www.kellymom.com/newman/04enough_milk.html
http://www.kellymom.com/store/freehandouts/enoughmilk01.pdf
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/start/basics/bf-logs.html

Here's some more info:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/pumping_decrease.html#...
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/alternative-feeding.html

I would also advise NOT supplumenting from a bottle. Use a Supplumental Nursing Sustem instead. Supplument her AT THE BREAST. Here's some more info on that and other non-bottle methods:
http://www.kellymom.com/bf/pumping/alternative-feeding.ht...

The most important thing that you can do to determine if your baby is getting enough milk is to do a before/after weigh. A lactation consultant can help with this? Where are you in CA? If you're in Ventura county, I know of one pediatrician who can help you although I haven't seen her myself. What you want to do is weigh her before nursing and after nursing.

Here's some more info on bottle-guzzling:
"“When babies are young, and we first intro the bottle, the bottle goes in the baby's mouth the mouth fills with milk, the baby is obligated to swallow and the action of swallowing initiates another suck. The suck again fills the mouth and the cycle repeats, giving an appearance of the baby "gulping the bottle down hungrily". Many times the baby fusses/cries after the bottle is taken away, leading caregivers or parents to assume that baby isn't "satisfied" with the amount of milk in the bottle. The problem isn't usually the volume of milk but rather the natural desire to "complete" the nursing cycle which at the breast, would include some comfort nursing. Comfort nursing is impossible with the bottle.

As time goes on and because the milk can be seen and measured, it is not unusual that babies are encouraged to feed beyond being full (to "satisfy" the baby). This then creates a situation where the infant is used to feeling over full meaning they then consume the higher volume without complaint, resulting in overfeeding that is only seen in bottle fed infants. Current/ongoing research seems to indicate this is one of the reasons that bottle fed infants are more likely to become obese - they lose their ability to regulate their appetite because they need to eat more as children/teens/adults to feel full." - Credit for that goes to Paula of Mother-2-Mother.com.

Please go to www.kellymom.com and click into the forums. There are LCs there who will help you.

GOOD LUCK! YOU CAN DO THIS!!!

Duh. I forgot that you ARE in Ventura county b/c of the way this forum works!!! Dr. Patty Auchard came reccomended very strongly as a ped who is also a LC. I haven't seen her myself, but I talked to her on the phone. She seems like she would be really good.

Sometimes moms can not breast feed, they don't produce enough milk. Sometimes it can do with your diet are eating enough. Try and pump all the time. Breast freeding is supply and demand, it only took a couple weeks for my milk to come in, and when it did it hurt even though they seemed full they were not. Try pumping at night, and some times durning the day. it stimulates the body to say you need to make milk. it's a 24hr process so try and see if that helps. If that doesn't than try maybe another dr. It may be that you can not produce enough milk. and also sometimes babies over eat. My daughter did, she would eat and you could hear the swolling but than she would pacify the nipple after she was eating cause it seemed like she would be on the boob. It could also be that your milk has not fully came in yet. Just keep trying to feed your baby as much as you can to let your body know that you need the milk.
that should work!
hope that HELPS

C., I agree with the woman that said do both you and your baby a favor, buy a bottle, formula and don't worry. Sometimes you can do everything correctly and it just isn't going to happen. Don't let this worry you or your baby. Although breast feeding is great, this is why we can buy formula.. Don't be sad, just kiss your baby and snuggle when you feed her, believe me she won't know the difference... I have grown kids, five grandkids, and lots of nieces and nephews.. some were successful and some were not.. They are all great parents! Good Luck

I agree with Molly and advise to you check out all of the links she provided. Your daughter sounds like a common newborn with regards to her frequent nursing. And a nursing baby is much more effective than a pump so do not look at pump output as a reflection of your output. Plus, the more you supplement with formula, the more you interfere with the supply and demand relationship: your body is an amazing thing and will produce what it things your baby needs which will be less if you supplement. One thing that helped me: once in ahwile, pump a little on one side while your baby nurses on the other. You dont have to produce much, but the stimulation will trick you body into thinking it has to produce more milk. And let your daughter nurse as much as she needs to to build your supply. And make sure you drink alot of water.

I went through the same thing with my 20-month old when she came out (also had a c-section). I believe the c-section and the drugs afterward really impact production so it takes a lot longer for your production to match your baby's need. I went to Pump Station and got advice from Corky, but recommend mostly that you just keep putting your baby on the boob as much as possible (sometimes every hour!) for about a week or two. I did the nursing and then pumping directly after and only ever got 1/4 oz at first, maxed out at 1 oz. Eventually, after about 1.5 weeks, I just started putting her right onto my boobs the next time she cried instead of nursing/pumping/nursing/pumping. You can get a scale at home to check for yourself, if you are nervous about the weight, but remember not to panic if day-by-day it isn't immediate. I sincerely believe that your body WILL rise to the occasion, you just have to be patient, trust, and mostly tolerate a lot of frustration and he** during that week or two while your supply comes up.

Get help from a good lactation consultant ASAP. One of the best you can find is Susan Orr. She has Monday and Saturday clinics with moms struggling with BF at Torrance Memorial Hospital. She can help figure out what isn't working and get you on a plan to improve your milk production. It is without a doubt the best $25 you'll spend in your life. I sought her help after coming home from the hospital with my daughter. She was able to quickly remedy my problems and get me on the right path. I was able to BF my daughter until she transitioned to milk at 1 year and I owe it all to Susan!

Hi C.

I know exactly how you feel i have a baby she is 5 months old now.and i had the same problem. What i used to do was, to drink lot of liquids, also oatmeal quaker the old fashioned boiled with water or milk and you can put cinnamon to give a litle bit of flavor. drink like 8onz 3 times a day. that help me a lot and if your baby is hungry try to combine formula and breast milk. cacao is also good to get more milk. I'm from Peru and what it really gave me more milk it's something that is call QUINUA (you can find it in Vallarta Market if you want to) that is a latin trick...boiled like 5 table spoons of QUINUA with 24 onz of water and drink it and you'll see how much milk your going to have =) ....I hope my advice helps you a lot!

Hi! Are you interested in nutrition to help your body get in balance and produce more milk. I have a dvd you can watch. Let me know. God Bless!

J.

Hang in there! There are a few things to know that might be helpful. First of all, it is normal for babies to lose some weight the first few days. It is not an indication that they're not thriving. Did you have colostrum? Colostrum is the first type of milk to come in. It is clearer and less fattening but is chock full of antibodies and everything baby needs. Remember milk changes according to baby's needs. Another thing to keep in mind is that a pump cannot suck as hard as a baby. Rest assured your baby is eating more than meets the eye. I recommend you keep well nourished and hydrated, feed baby as often as she likes and let her empty you out and then some before giving her formula. Ofetn times my baby would still seem hungry after a feeding and I would just let him nurse till he fell asleep. Breastfeeding is a supply and demand thing, so if you keep it up, your milk supply will increase and indeed be enough to nourish your baby. Best Wishes!