Birthing Plan

Updated on February 10, 2008
R.G. asks from Independence, KS
29 answers

I keep hearing to make a birthing plan, but this is my first pregnancy, so I do not know what to expect or even how to begin making a birthing plan. If any of you have any suggestion, I would appreciate it!

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So What Happened?

Thank you to everyone who responded. I really appreciate everyone's advice. I understand more about birhting plans now. Thanks again! R. G

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T.H.

answers from St. Louis on

My midwife said to put one together, but to make it flexable. My husband found exaples in "The Expectant Father" We wrote one out and that made us feel better about the process.

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M.

answers from Wichita on

I agree with Janie. I took the time to prepare a birthing plan which ended up being a waste of time. Just remember that if you do decide to have one, that it is JUST a plan and not to freak out if it doesn't go as planned. As long as baby arrives healthy, this is the most important aspect. Have a wonderfuly pregnancy!

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K.L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

R.,

Congrats!!! Coming from a nurse...I try to keep from rolling my eyes when someone says they have a birth plan. I always get "I dont want my water broke", or "I refuse to have an episiotomy", or "I refuse the epidural, no mater how many times I ask, do not give me one". "I do not want an IV", And my favorites "I do not want pitocin during labor or after I deliver" or "even though I am being induced, I do not want to be monitored."

Every now and then I get a wonderful birthing plan, that includes "I would like to breast feed as soon as possible", or "I would prefer not to have an epidural, but I will tell you if I change my mind". Some facilities will allow you to only have a heplock instead of an IV, but you need to ask these questions in advance, rather than just arriving and insisting things that conflict with the facilities policies. Also, things such as, I would like my baby to be in the room with me as much as possible, instead of "under no circumstances will my baby be out of my sight" are appreciated.

My best advice is talk with your Obstetrician, and the hospital where you plan to deliver, ask a lot of questions, then carefully write your birthplan with those considerations in mind. Some facilities like where I currently work, and some of the others I have worked at require continuous monitoring, and IV lines. And especially if you are receiving any medication, you need to have the baby and your contractions monitored for both of your safety. If your water is not broke, and you are not receiving any medications, speak with your doctor about being able to walk around off the monitor intermittently during the earlier part (under 5-6 cm) Birthing balls are great, but some facilities do not have them, so you may check into getting one to take with you. Good luck, I hope it is the best experience of your life.

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M.L.

answers from Rockford on

I believe a birthing plan is basically your wishes when u are in labor like if you want pain meds or not, and things like that.

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G.H.

answers from Topeka on

R. - A birthing plan...I have had five kids and can tell you that this is something you cannot plan. However, you can have your thoughts about what you would like to happen. I would recommend filling one out and using the "best" case scenario, you know where everything goes perfect and you can handle everything and your doctor/midwife is right where you need them at the right time. But, realistically, this will not be the case - The way I did it, was I filled a plan out, I wanted lights low, soft music, no epidural, blah, blah, blah. What I ended up with was three nurses, my midwife, the daddy, and a birthing ball - Not the soft relaxing atmosphere I had pictured - more like a cheerleading squad cheering me on. And guess what, I wouldn't have changed a thing (except for maybe closing the door to the room - so that not every Tom, Dick and Harry who walked past saw this huge 9 month pregnant naked women trying to bounce on the danged ball) sure did make for a funny moment or two. I never had an epidural (even with a ten pounder) in the five birthing processes and I survived - but that is purely a personal choice - Do whatever you feel would be best for YOU and baby - not Daddy,not midwife, but YOU! Take care and good luck - Even after all of my babies - I am still jealous!

G.

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K.S.

answers from Oklahoma City on

A birthing plan is awesome!! I would not have a baby without one. With my labor I did not want to be hooked up to anything at all and wanted to walk freely without IV and wanted to be able to get in the whirlpool. I was free to do what I wanted and even had lunch with my family during labor in the hospital cafeteria!

I also did not want an epidural or any other medical intervention. When we first got to the hospital, the nurse was hooking me up to all kinds of machines and I had to say wait, please review our birthing plan and once she did we were free to have the birth we wanted.

Hope this helps.

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C.L.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Hi R.-
We did a natural childbirth with my son and made a birth plan. I would definitely recommend it if you are going that route. We had our doctor sign it and brought several copies to the hospital with us. It is a great way to make sure your dr. is on board with your decisions and let the nurses at the hospital see that too. The birth plan we used discussed everything from being monitored during labor to whether or not you want you baby to room in with you. Our Bradley teacher gave us our "form", so you might check the Bradley website for a form or I am sure googling "birth plan" will give you lots of options. Good luck!

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B.S.

answers from St. Joseph on

More than a birthing plan, I would just make sure your doctor and coach know what you DON'T want...for example if you're sure you don't want an epidural, make sure they know. My sister was VERY against forceps and suction, and I was in the room with her...she was having trouble getting the baby out, and the dr. went for the suction, and I stepped in (knowing that this was her "plan") and said no...the dr. let her continue pushing and the baby was born without using it. Just letting them know ahead of time what you don't want is probably the best plan in my opinion. But remember that you might change your mind, so leave it somewhat open...
Good Luck, and congratulations on your first child!!!
B.

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J.M.

answers from Tulsa on

Forget the birth plan. I have had three children, and I am a Labor and Delivery Nurse. Have been birthing babies for well over 30 years. When a couple comes in with a "birth plan" it is an instant solution for trouble. It seems like that couple has more difficulty with anything that can happen.
Usually the hospital, and your doctor, has a routine proceedure that is followed but can be adjusted. Usually the best way to approch the question of what is going to happen next is to set an appointment with the labor unit and ask them what is the normal proceedure to have a baby at their facility.
Most labor units require either an IV. This is to keep you hydradted and to be able to give you medications if you need them quickly if you need them. Some physicians will allow a heprin lock which aleviates the IV tubing. Some physicians will allow you to ambulate during the first part of labor.
Your best bet is to ask you physician what he/she allows during labor. Next, tour the delivering facility, keep an open mind and hopefully you will have a nurse that will be sensative to what you would like to do. Read lots of books about labor, watch a few birth stories on tv but don't get too caught up on everything you see or read. I know it is often frightening not knowing what to expect but keep informed.
Would suggest that you do not take the world with you to the hospital. Your husband, and mom, until you get close to delivery. First babies usually take at least 12 hours to deliver, even after you reach the hospital. Have the nurse let you know when she calls the doctor for delivery, then have hubby call the family to come to the hospital at that time. They should have sufficent time to be there for the baby.
Have a great time when you deliver. It should be pleasant and wonderful. J.

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T.R.

answers from Lawrence on

R.,
15 months ago, I was 34 and having my first child asking the same question. My doctor suggested that instead of an exact written birthing plan that we discuss any of my dos, don't and concerns regarding the birthing procedure so that she would know my wishes and how to react in any situation that might occur. for example, I was interested in pain meds, ephedural as soon as possible, no forceps or vacume if could be avoided, wanted my son placed in the warmer directly after birth and given to me when cleaned up. As you can see, I am not good with pain and have a pretty weak stomach...but my doc knew this and thus took notes and put into my own personal little "birthing plan". Just disscuss with your doctor during your routine visits what you want and don't want....I did and things went wonderfully!
T.

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L.B.

answers from St. Louis on

A birthing plan basically lets you and the people at the hospital know what you want when the time comes. Things are usually very stressful and busy especially for first timers. So....YES YES YES, definitely make a birthing plan. I really didn't have one with my first son( who is now 8 years old) and I had so many people in the room i really didn't get to enjoy those first few moments with my son. With my second son (now a year old) it was just me and my husband. It makes a big difference to have just a few requests or things you don't want ( like drugs, monitoring, etc...)jotted down on a peice of paper rather than have to make a split decision when you're going through a contraction from hell :) Most likely you'll be calm and everything will happen like it should, but just in case, have a birthing plan. www.DivineCaroline.com here is a web site that has some good advise and sample birthing plans you can check out. Good Luck Sweetie!

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M.S.

answers from Wichita on

I think definitely going over your expectations with your doctor, and listing exactly what you want to happen is great. I wanted a natural birth, no bottles or pacifiers given, also no vaccination the first day my baby was born. It didn't all happen exactly as planned (I ended up being in labor for 28 hours and got an epidural after 16, I was so exhausted) but having the plan reassured me that I was in charge of what was happening. If you are looking at natural child birth options, a great resource is the Bradley Method. This is a course that takes you through exactly what to expect, the choices you have to make, and also a birth plan outline helper. There is a chiropractor in my town that teaches these courses. I'll include the website, in case you are interested.

http://www.bradleybirth.com/

Good luck and Congratulations! I'd be happy to answer questions, if you want.

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B.R.

answers from Kansas City on

R., Don't stress too bad about your birthing plan. Basically all you are doing is deciding where you will have the baby, if you would like medication, what you want to do if difficulties arrise and etc. I would say your best source would by your OBGYN. Start by talking to your doctor and then sit down and make your decisions. For me, I decided that the hospital was best for my first baby and got an idea about the other doctors in my doc's office. I also decided to go as long as I could without any medications, and then educated myself ahead of time about all my options in case I wanted some. I didn't make a huge deal about it and I am really glad b/c that would have been just one more thing. I trusted my doctor and the hospital staff was wonderful. I told them when I arrived that I would let them know what meds if any I wanted. Try not to worry about too much. And, I guess my advice is see what other moms you trust did and wish they had done and, above all, talk to your doctor. You obviously trust your doctor or you would change doctors, so talk to him/her. CONGRATS!
B.
Gymboree of Lee's Summit

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S.E.

answers from Tulsa on

Whether or not you need a birth plan is a completely individual decision. If you desire a natural birth in a hospital setting, once you've educated yourself on options and interventions, a birth plan may be a good idea for you. Some women have strong desires regarding the offering of pain medications, the environment of the room (and the amount of traffic in/out of it), various interventions known to increase the risk for unnecessary cesarean, directed pushing, immediate baby care, etc.; these are the things to put in a birth plan. Some women have no desire to have input in any part of their experience, and thus have no need for a birth plan.

Remember that birth plans should not be overly wordy or confrontational. As a doula, I offer my clients a one-page, basic plan that covers just about every "major" birthing issue by labor stage. It is customized for whatever bits are important to the parents. I also include a note at the top to the other birth team members (nurses, doctors, etc.) that makes it clear that the plan is a *guide* the parents wish to be respected but that it IS flexible. I always encourage parents to go over it with the doctor ahead of time so everybody's on the same page. Well-written birth plans encourage communication between parents and staff; if there is good rapport and respect between them, there's less chance of postpartum second-guessing of why and how things changed if changes to "the plan" occur.

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M.H.

answers from Tulsa on

This will probably rub some people the wrong way...I mean not to offend...just my opinion. I think Birthing Plans are ridiculous. I have had two children and had a great relationship w/ my OB/GYN. I think if you go to all your visits #1 your doctor knows what your preferrences are. #2 with your first baby how in the crap do you know what you want because you have NEVER been through labor. That's harsh but true. NO ONE knows how they are going to react until you're actually there and in labor. Nor can you predict what your labor will require.

Like a response already said..shouldn't your birth plan be Do whatever it takes to have a healthy baby.

Serisouly..this is an exciting time for you. Don't stress over a set plan. Express to your doctor preferrences you have while at the office, then just enjoy the process. You can't predict how things will go, just let your husband in on the feelings you have and he can support you in them when the time comes.

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S.D.

answers from Topeka on

It is a good idea to have it in writing if you know what you want like a natural birth and you truly belive in it then that should be in there mine were both natural I never was asked for an epidural,I know that you can plan so hard for it to go one way but it turns around so quickly just keep in mind you have so many options talk to your doctor on what he may advise you to do weigh the risk discomfort and then the huge sigh of relief when your lil baby is out and to see you for the first time.Give a copy to your doctor at your next check up so for it can be looked at then tell the nurses when you go and have your baby what your plans are.Having a baby is a wonderful feeling!!!Good Luck

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S.S.

answers from Wichita on

Ok here is what you need to do. Call the hospital that you will deliver at they should either host classes or tell you where to call. If you and your husband/significant other take a birthing class, sometimes known as Lamaze they will cover this, give you one to fill out and tell you some things that you probably never knew that you could do! This class is so beneficial even if you are not planning to have a natural delivery I find that is the common misconception, people say well I am going to have drugs I don't need to learn how to breathe, well you will have to go thru some labor before you get the drugs and it is helpful. If for nothing else they will explain what you can expect to happen. I think you should check into it. Congrats and good luck!

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L.B.

answers from Bloomington on

I wrote a birth plan. I just wrote, To Whom it May concern and then wrote what I expected. For example, if you want an epidural you can write that you want one. If you want to breastfeed, you can write that you do not want your child to be given a pacifier or bottle because you want to breastfeed. Ask your OB. Most are used to birth plans. Do be prepared to bend your requests a little. For instance I told my doc that I did NOT want a C-section but my son would be dead if I had not agreed to have one since he was born at 32 weeks.

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S.S.

answers from Kansas City on

Hi R.,
A birthing plan is a plan of what you would like done while you are in labor and during your delivery. You can find and print one off the internet, or your doctor should be able to give you one. It has things from medications that you would prefer during labor, to whether you want your baby to be given a pacifier. Just be sure to let the nurses know that you have one, so that they are able to comply with your wishes. Congratualtions and good luck!!

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H.H.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Hi R.-I read your post and knew I had to respond b/c your situation was mine until birth in Nov. of last year. 37, 1st child and no birth plan-and no idea of the who, what, when & how of a plan. Let me just say the main thing I can convey to you is no matter what-Be Flexible! I want to tell you my story & why I say that but really there's not enough room here-so trust me that will help you immensely if you can maintain flexibility once the whole birthing process begins. A birth plan is simply what you want to happen @ your birth-sounds easy, right? Yeah-if you know what to expect but being your 1st you can't know what it's like until it's over b/c every birth experience is different. Another thing a lot depends on where you are planning to have your baby-home, midwifery center, or a hospital? W/ whom? OB & nurses or a midwife,etc.? There are going to be different things to consider depending on those types of things. Like if in a hosp.-epidural or not, pitocin, pain meds?Vacuum extraction, forceps? What about what you want for the baby like the eye antibiotic & hep b vaccine?-what course of action if complications arise-keep trying vaginally or straight to a C-section(there of course will be a limit to how much can be tried for baby's safety & yours-but this is just something to think about-don't concentrate on probs- the plan is is so that you and your hubby can have the birth YOU want). If w/ a midwife then make sure they/she knows what you want too. Like how long in labor before going to hosp? Herbs, accupressure, etc. I know it seems like a lot but you will be happy that you don't have to repeat yourself for every new shift of nurses and caregivers at the hosp.-Sorry out of room-Hope this helps-H.

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C.C.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Birthing plans can be a good idea, but do not let it be "set in stone" as you may not know what can happen. It will involve who you want in the room with room and wether to have an epidural or other medications or not and when to have them. There is a point that is too late for an epidural. If the baby has to be taken out of the room after birth for care(like mine did) if you want your husband to go with the baby or stay with you. If you want pics take during birth(if allowed by hospital) or afterwards when you are more covered and through the hard part. Will hubby cut the cord? There are lots of extras, too. Do you want music? Do you want a big mirror if available to see the baby's head coming out? Do want to breastfeed right way after the birth or wait and rest? Will you have the baby in the room with you the whole time or would you like to rest and have the nursery take care of her. If you are breast feeding let the nurses know not to give a bottle when in the nursery so the baby won't get nipple confusion. As I mention, there may be changes to make later, but if you and your husband know what you are expecting of each other it just makes it easier to get through. Congratulations!!!

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A.T.

answers from Rockford on

R., congratulations!

A lot of people advise having a written birthing plan and having enough copies for all medical personnel who may assist you. If you really want to do this, you can find ideas online at babyzone.com or in the back of the What to Expect pregnancy planner.

I recommend against having a written birthing plan for one simple reason--your birth won't happen as you've planned it. You will become frustrated and disappointed when the picture you've painted is washed away. Have some basic ideas, such as who will be in the delivery room, what type of pain management you want to use (but be open to changes), the use of birthing aids such as a birthing ball or bath.

Keep in mind that no one can predict how your labor and delivery will happen until you're in the midst of it. You may need more or different things than you had planned upon, including a C-section. Just have a basic idea in your mind, be flexible, and remember that, God willing, the outcome is a beautiful child.

Good luck.

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A.L.

answers from Kansas City on

R.,
Congratulations on your pregnancy! I had my first baby at 36, and am expecting our 2nd at the end of February at 39 years old! Being a mom has been the most rewarding experience of my life.
As far as your birth plan, I would recommend babycenter.com. Go to the website, and search "birth plan." It is a really good place to start, and walks you right through all the issues you need to think about and make decisions on. You can also sign up for weekly updates on your pregnancy. It's kind of neat to read about the growth of your baby on a weekly basis. Hope this helps. Just try to remember that even though you have a birth plan, try to remain flexible, because most of the time things don't go as we planned in labor and delivery. It's nice to have your wishes in writing, but just go with the flow, and before you know it, you'll be holding your beautiful baby in your arms!

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J.H.

answers from St. Louis on

Congratulations on your pregnancy. I was the same age as you with my first.

I had a birth plan with both my children. Like many people advised, flexibility is the key. My first was born via c/section for unknown breech presentation. Had I not requested to see my baby immediately after birth in my birth plan the hospital policy would not have permitted it. It was (and still may be) against policy if a woman has a cesarean. It is a ridiculous policy that my doula couldn't believe was in place. The plan gave my labor and delivery nurse leverage to honor my request. Since, the birth plan is not a legally binding document, I was also lucky to have this particular nurse. With my second I had a natural VBAC. Most things went how I wanted in my birth plan. I also showed up both times at 8 cm.

I see the birth plan as a conversation starter between you and your care provider during prenatal visits. How you word it is key. You can create a document where you "do not consent" to different interventions. The challenge to this is you also set yourself up for being seen negatively by hospital staff. I think a birth plan is important. There are many online you can look at. Keep it short and to the point. Don't put extra things in that hospitals don't routinely do.

What is more important is interviewing many care providers and choosing one who fits your philosophy. If you are naturally minded choose a care provider who supports this. The cesarean rate is currently 31.1%. Some of these are necessary for the health and safety of mothers and babies some aren't. Choose a care provider with a low rate of cesareans. Educate yourself and know the risks and benefits for all interventions. The Coalition for Improving Maternity Services and the International Cesarean Awareness Network are great places to start. Good luck with your pregnancy.

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M.M.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Hi R.,
I made a birthing plan and when it came time, I had to do what was best for my baby. I know you probably want to plan everything (I know I did) but...when your baby is ready to come, it will! I think making a birthing plan is great but sometimes unecessary. When the moment comes, you just want what is best for your child. I had to have an emergency c-section and had not even thought about having a c-section. I didn't give it a second thought when they said my baby needed to come out ASAP. Things happen and it will all work out the way it is supposed to! Good Luck and Congrats! It's an amazing feeling being a mom!

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B.M.

answers from Enid on

I took lamaze classes with my first. They were very inexpensive (that was 19 yrs ago). This is a very good way to prepare you and your spouse for what to expect, as well as breathing exercises and other alternatives. Talk to your doctor they can usually lead you in the right direction for your area. The idea is an all natural labor experience. Since you are learning and practicing different techniques you are totally prepared. I didn't take the classes with my second and it was a mistake.
The baby will come whether you are ready or not, the more you know the better prepared you will be. Plan or no plan, I think it's all about being informed.
Best of luck to you and your new family.

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A.S.

answers from Kansas City on

You might want to Google "Birthing Plan." I came up with quite a few sites with examples. You also might want to ask your OBGYN, labor coach, doula, hospital, or birthing center if they have some sort of form that they use.

I thought I would need a plan too... turns out I didn't. I just made sure I told my husband what I wanted and my doctor. My husband was in charge of any phone calls/visitors I received, helping me breathe... telling the nurses if I needed something. I think you only really need a PLAN if there are quite a few things you want done specifically that are out of the "norm." Like, not cutting the cord right away, or doing cord blood banking, keeping the placenta, no pain meds, etc. Just keep in mind that it hardly ever goes as you plan beforehand. Something usually happens that you didn't count on.

However, a plan might be good just to help you put your mind at ease about the whole experience. Just remember to keep an open mind.

Good luck! :)

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C.D.

answers from St. Louis on

I had a birthing plan...until everything went completely opposite of the plan.

I ended up in St. Louis for almost 3 weeks, delivering by c-section after 21 hours of induced hard labor--which I badly needed an epidural after going through most of those hours without anything.

Make a plan if you feel it will help you. My Dr sat and read my entire birthing plan (after her office hours, sitting on the floor, eating pizza--I think she said) and really enjoyed it. I believe if things would have been "normal", she would have gone according to my wishes.

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A.B.

answers from St. Louis on

We had a baby boy 18 months ago and had a birthing plan, and basically threw it out once my contractions started. I had to be induced, so contractions I hear come much quicker and you can not get used to them quite as quickly. In my birthing plan, I had said that I did not want to use an epidural unless I had to. So, I threw mine out and went with the epidural. If you have specific procedures that you would like done, then I suggest that you do make one up, but where I delivered, St. Johns Mercy Medical Center in StLouis, the staff were wonderful and I don't plan on making a birthing plan for my next one which is due Apr. 25th.
A.

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