Discipline for a 15 Month Old

My daughter has been doing the same type of things lately. What I do is I tell her no sternly and if she does something bad again I put her in time out, it's usually only for about 30 seconds or so, but by the time she's out she doesn't want to go back. Good luck!

my son is also a climber and everything else, were trying the time out approach 1 minute per year and it's not perfect but its helping. he now knows what is a no no he still does it but he's is starting with the coralation. If any one else has better fixes that work for you send them to me I need help tooooooooo....THanks maybe this will work for you.

I have to respond becaouse this sounds like a dangerous situation to have happening...I hope you don't think these ideas are too idealistic but try it for a month or two...one thing I didn't hear was the suggestion for the parents to try to talk about WHY the coffe table is a no-no. It's not "bad" to climb, but not on the tables without safety nets. Since toddlers learn fast and yes they can understand simple words like; "ouch", "get boo-boo", "bump head", "up too high", "climb at the park not in the house" try it. And since this phase may be brief, think of rearranging your furniture; remove the coffe table, turn your coffe table upside down during wake times, or putting your dining chairs up against the wall so your toddler cannot climb onto the table, or get some large appliance boxes and make forts out of them... think outside the box-outsmart them...have fun with them...do the things they enjoy with them and teach them safe ways to do it.. "climb and the park NOT in the house". I ran a daycare for 10 years and I have a degree in Therapeutic Recreation and it wasn't easy for me to adjust to a group of six children. But I found that having certain times for climbing , drawing, playdo, singing, reading together, eating etc. let the toddlers know when and where certain activities were expected to happen(not too far in advance)and wow they were so cooperative and looked forward to the day! They learned quickly what came next!-mabe make a picture schedule. And the prenap routine(potty, brush teeth, read together) even helped them look forward to the naptime-it worked with ALL personality types. Don't we as adults like to know when and what our days is going to include? Toddlers are old enough to enjoy a choice of daily activities("point to the [picture] one you want to do" or a way of knowing when they can expect to do their favorite activity...this is respectful of each of your needs...this is a great age for them and for you to enjoy...if you can stay one step ahead of them you won't have to say no so much...and you'll both have fun together.(enjoy spending time with them now because when they are teens they DON'T want to hang out with you:)...much.

Nicole,

Sometimes natural consequences can be the best teacher of them all. As long as you have removed all serious dangers from the coffee table area he may just have to learn by falling. He obviously understands the limits and chooses to break them anyway.

This worked with my son when he tried pushing the limit and numerous reprimands did not work. At one point he decided to climb on a chair and jump onto a pillow on the floor. We have a wood floor and I told him numerous why this leap was not safe and not to do it again. Anyways, long story short, he did a flying leap again, I pretended not to notice from another room until the moment of truth came and the pillow slipped out from under him and he crashed to the floor. My son was not seriously hurt, just a couple of bumps. We spoke about the rules and why they are there. Since that time he hasn't pushed the "safety" limits so much. It was a valuable lesson that boys at some time need to learn, that they are not invincible.

I hope this helps. Good luck!

I totally agree with Liz and Janet. My son is a total boy. He was climbing in and on everything at that age too, but now that he's 2, he doesn't do it as much. He occupies his time with other things. However, those little jungle gyms can get expensive, so as an alternative get crazy yourself and throw the couch cushions on the floor in some sort of pattern that he can climb up and down on. He'll love it no matter what, especially if you climb on it with him.

Hi N.,

When my son was 16 months old, that is when I started to put him in time out. What I would have to do was, I would put him on a spot on the floor (the same exact spot every time), and I would literally have to stand next to him (without really looking at him, at least not much.) Every time he started to get up, I would put him right back in his spot. I would have to do this maybe 10 times at first, but after the first few times, he would literally sit there (and cry) the whole time. (I only made him sit there for a minute--now that he is two years old, he sits there for two minutes.) After the first week of standing right next to him, I would start to stand further away from him, like 3 feet away, then 6 feet away, then finally across the room. (Okay, I never measured the distance, but you get the picture.) It didn't take long for him to figure out that he had to stay there, whether or not I was nearby.

Time out has actually worked pretty good. Of course, it's not a miracle, because let's face it, we have TODDLERS, but for the most part it has worked really well with us. It has gotten to the point where all I have to do is threaten time out and he stops. (If for some reason he continues to do whatever it is he is doing, I make sure I do follow up with my "threat" of time out; otherwise, he would think he could get away with anything.)

You really have to pick and choose your battles with a toddler (otherwise, you will be saying NO all day long!); so I just use time out when it is something very very important, such as the threat of hurting himself (like climbing on top of the kitchen table or counter), or if he hurts somebody else (especially his 9-month old sister!)

Our doctor had actually told me that I could've started doing time-out with him when he was 12 months old, like she did with her kids. I just felt that 12 months was too early for my son. I may have been able to get away with it when he was 14 or 15 months old, but honestly it never really occurred to me until he was closer to 16 months old. I am really glad I didn't wait any longer, because some of my friends did and they had a much harder time at getting their kids to sit in time out (my son is so good about it now, all I have to do is point to his time-out chair and he goes right there!) And I make sure that as soon as he is done with time out, I explain to him why it was wrong for him to do what he did, keeping it very simple, and then I give lots of hugs and kisses! You might wanna give this a try...like I said, you may have to sit him back down a billion times at first, but sooner or later, he will get the hang of it. Good luck!

Hi N.,
My daughter was quite a climber too. Disciplining her for climbing had little effect - it was like she needed to climb. We ended up buying her one of those kangaroon climbers from Toys R Us. It's a small plastic climbing thing with a slide. We put it right in our living room, using foam squares to cover the wood floor. When she began to climb on anything else, I would pick her say it was only okay to climb "here" and place her on or at the climbing structure. At that time I had no idea how strong-willed she would turn out to be, but for some reason this worked. It's like I said, she needed to climb or something. Redirection continues to work well for her. Best wishes to you!
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L.

HI N. -

Count your blessings he's only getting up on the table! I am a single mom with three boys and all three were climbers. They all at one point or another found their way on top of the refrigerator. My oldest found a way to get on top of my 60 gallon fish tank, too. He broke the glass top and didn't get a single scratch. That didn't put any fear in him. He also found a way to get on top of my home made bird cage that hung 6 inches from the ceiling. My middle wasn't quite as bad. He liked and still likes to climb on proper climbing structures outside. My youngest used to climb on top of his Little Tykes Coupe car and jump off. He landed head first the second time he jumped off (no tears, just scared him) and after explaining to him it wasn't safe to do that he still got right back up there and jumped again. He hit the same spot as the second time and he split his head open, no stitches, though. He still loves to climb - absolutely no fear. When he was 18 months old he got up onto my countertop, turned on the stove then proceeded to crawl across the hot burner - 2nd degree burns and no tears! Now that my boys are older they have finally learned the hazzards of climbing but it took a few years of time outs and "no, that isn't safe" speeches. It's a normal phase boys go through. Just be consistent with what you are doing and he will learn. Sitting him in your lap for time out to start is a good idea if you can't get him to sit still alone. That's the only way I could get mine to sit still for a time out. Now they get sent to their rooms to sit on their beds and think about what they've done wrong until I come talk to them. Through trial and error I found what works for us. Good luck - stay strong - S.

Time outs and redirects. My son has "the stairs". "Go sit on the stairs" is all we say when he's misbehaved. Sometimes he needs "helping" to the stairs, other times he goes by himself. Our timeouts are followed by a discussion of why it is unacceptable to act that way and now that he's five we discuss other ways he can handle the situation. Then, we talk about what other fun activities he can next do instead of reverting to the same behavior.

I am the proud SAHM of 2 boys (5yrs and 1yr) and the only answer to this question is consistency. My one year old has been climbing on the chairs and coffee table for about a month now and we have dealt with our share of falls and bumps/bruises. With boys, that is something you will get used to quickly. They always manage to find something to climb on and just as quickly, fall off it. When it comes to behavior that is unacceptable or unsafe, you just have to stick with it and never back down. Your response has to be the same the first time and the 101st time. Eventually, he will get it. Let him know that the consequences will always be the same and that your response is never going to change. Good luck!!! Boys are a handful but I wouldn't trade mine for anything.

Hi N.,
I'm thinking he sees you getting him down as a game. IT is also another way to get your attention.

I would walk over and stand near where he is (so he don't fall) and make him get down on his own. I would then take him to another room and find something for him to do as a distraction. The more you make him get down on his own(as opposed to taking him down)the less fun it will be for him.

Maybe you can find a place that has some of the bigger building type blocks that are vinyl with a mat on their floor so he can climb there. (I've heard there are some gyms and such that do that in their child care areas.)

Some say that children this age don't really understand what we are saying. I disagree. I think if when you tell him to get down, you tell him that climbing is not a good choice. Then as you lead him to another area to do another thing, explain that "this is a much better choice" and praise the good behavior.

Also, at that age, I'm not opposed to ONE quick swat on the padded (diapered) behinds God gave them. Sometimes, once is all it takes - and it is enough of a surprise they don't want that again.

Good Luck!

K.

I agree with Debbie R. I too, have a 16 month old boy and he LOVES to climb. The other day I found him sitting on my kitchen table on top of my laptop, smiles from ear to ear! I couldn't believe my eyes. I took him down and walked over to "his couch" placed him in it and began counting...I counted to 60 and then allowed him up. The couple times he tried to get up I told him "no, you are in time out" and continued to keep counting. Now he knows he has to stay there until I'm done counting (which is a pain in the butt, but it's working right now. Maybe later I will change it to a timer or something.??) I also agree that toddlers (boys more than girls it seems) like to CLIMB but they seem to grow out of it. I guess we all have to keep our fingers crossed and hope for no broken bones...
Let me know if you find somthing good that works too! haha

Hi N.,
It sounds like your son is really testing you. You need to be consistent and firm with whatever you decide to do. I would give him a little swat on the bottom to let him know that no means no. If you are'nt comfortable with spanking you might want to put him in his crib or some place for a time out. I wouldn't hold him because that is a reward. However he could be doing this for attention so be sure he is getting enough of that. I am mother to 3 adult girls and 2 grandchildren. Hope this helps.

hi- I'm new to this and don't know how this works-I have the dame problem, but don't know if there is a way for me to see what people responded to you. Anyways, my son just turned 16 months and is climbing on everything and thinks it is halarious. Yesterday he fell off his toybox and hit his face on a toy and now has a cut and bruise on his nose, but he keeps trying to get back up there! So, if you get any good advise please forward it to me or let me know if there is a way to read responses. thanks! ____@____.com

N., Where CAN he crawl???? If you create a place he can do this climbing, that is safe, then he will learn there is an appropriate time and place for it. Because really, climbing is not wrong, just dangerous under the wrong circumstances. This is just a phase he is going though that requires an outlet of some sort. Do you have a junglegym of sorts???? Do you take him to the play areas from time to time at the malls? Sometimes that can be a good release for his need to crawl, climb, run, and be crazy. Remember that this is just his way of trying to figure things out. But, you don't want him to crack his head open while learning about gravity. :( So, maybe even get him into to a gymboree program of some sort, if they make them for that young. Good luck.
J.

Hi N.,

I am a mom-to-be, but I trained Gymboree teachers and taught Gymboree classes for a long time. We had a lot of moms that experienced the same things that you are, and I find that moms often think that when they are this small they don't understand. They DO, and they are learning what you are willing to tolerate and what you are not.
I have to agree with some of the moms here that are telling you to stop taking him down, and have him do it by himself. This will definitely teach him that it is not a game. I am not sure (if I were in your shoes) that I would be willing to rearrange my living room to accommodate his climbing, but I do think that he probably needs more time to burn off that energy in a safe place. You should check to see if you have a Gymboree Play & Music near your home or some other early childhood program that would allow him to get out all of those climbing jitters in a safe environment with mats and soft equipment.
I think that you are doing the right thing by wanting to teach and train him that this is not tolerable behavior and I would consider the possibility that he requires more of your attention right now than you are possibly giving him. I suspect that he is doing it because he knows that you are coming to stop him.
Good Luck, I know that you will make the best choice for you and your family. I sincerely hope that you are able to distract him before he gets injured! :-)

My now 14 yr. old was a climber and had to be put in a toddler bed at 9 mons. old. He would climb furniture, kitchen counters,and I would catch him hanging from the freezer door. He was challenging. I would get him down tell him no and use timeouts. I always made sure I knew where he was. Just get him down and keep telling him no and use a 1 minute timeout. He will eventually catch on. But boys like to climb. Just wait until he's old enough to climb trees.

Yes, the joys of raising an active boy. They are cute but... wow! My son at that age would get on top of our glass top table! I really think what you are doing is about it. It has been quite a while, but I think all I did was constantly redirect, and when you can't be with him make sure he is in a room gated. He will learn, and with maturity will calm down.

The best "discipline" for this age is distraction!!