Does It Make You Sad to See Your Kids Growing Up?

Updated on November 18, 2013
L.K. asks from Plover, WI
58 answers

My oldest is going into kindergarten Next year!!!Were has this time gone.I am really sad 1/3 of my kids are starting school.My youngest is now 8 months old.My middle is turning 3 in January.It makes me sad.There growing up right before my eys.Does it makr you sad to see your kids growing up?

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V.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

Not sad. Bittersweet, maybe.

I am proud of the young people my kids are growing up into. These days it is less about sad and more about scared. My 15 year old is practicing driving a stick shift and cruising the interstate. Oh.. and joined the wrestling team, which is only slightly less scary than the driving.

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C.V.

answers from Columbia on

Not at all. I love every stage they go through and am excited for the next. It makes me smile to think that the little one who used to sleep on my chest is now nearly as tall as I am.

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V.S.

answers from Reading on

It made me sad until I considered the alternative of not growing when a friend lost a young relative my daughter's age. I decided to focus on what was cool and fun in each new stage.

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

No, I wasn't sad watching my daughter grow up. I loved each stage of her from baby to now almost 19 and living on her own and going to college.

She lives about 20 minutes from me and I can say its very rewarding for me when she calls and just wants to hang out, asks me to make her favorite marinara sauce so she can take some home, or just meet for lunch after her classes.

Starting K is a big step and the school years do fly by but it's exciting to watch your children as they grow. You can see what influences you've had on them ( good and bad) .

I'm so proud of my daughter for who she has become. Each year was not rosy and perfect, we also learned from the harder years and it made us all stronger.

Try not to be sad ( or let your children think you're sad) Embrace the stages and enjoy this ride!!

ETA: part of my attitude is because when my daughter was 4 and in Mothers Day Out, her best friend died. This little girl and her family had been in our lives since our daughters were born. We grieved the loss of her friend. To this day, when I see her mom, there is just something unspoken when we look at each other . Her friend was a picture if good health as well. She laid down for a nap and woke with a bad headache, went into a coma and died. We do think about the what ifs and we do count our blessings every day.

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H.G.

answers from Lancaster on

I may be the only person who doesn't mourn the fact that my child has moved on to the next stage. I danced when she was finally out of diapers. I was thrilled when she started talking so I didn't have to guess what she needed any more and could tell me what hurt if she was sick. I patted myself and her on the back when she started school - those first few years are wonderful but HARD.

I sort of get the being sad thing, but I was always too excited about the "look what she can do now" part that I forgot what she wasn't doing any more. My one and only baby is now a freshman in high school and I'm amazed every day at the person she is becoming. I am starting to get a little anxious that in 4 short years, she'll be off to college and then who knows what. I'm trying hard to enjoy every moment along the way. By doing that, there's no time to be sad.

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S.T.

answers from Houston on

Sad - no. Bittersweet, blessed, happy, overall a mixed bag of complex emotions - yes. For me I am aware of the limited time we have and I try to focus on just being happy in the moment and with where we are at any given moment. It will all be over far too soon. Phase to phase life drains inevitably away.

I buried my grandmother last week. She was in her late eighties. I remember going through the old family photos and seeing photos of her back in the fifties. She was where I am now, newly married with young children and her whole adult life in front of her. It gave me pause and I am still mulling it over. All of my grandparents are gone; my parents and aunts/uncles are now the leaders of the family. I see my parents aging and I see my children growing up. I am somewhere in between them. My ever constant thought is where does the time go? Not sadness, just mellow bittersweet feelings over the passage of time. The only time I am sad is over a tragic death. My husband lost a very good friend earlier this summer to a drunk driver. The man left behind a wife, a 15 year old and an 11 year old. Their loss and the circumstance of his death make me sad and mad in equal measure. It also reminds me, though, you never know just how much time you get so you should focus on the positives and count your blessings. I make sure I tell and show my husband and my kids I love them regularly. Then I get busy with the business of living life.

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K.C.

answers from Denver on

No, not really. I'm not a huge fan of very small children and when my kids were little, life was really rough. Our oldest is on the Autism Spectrum and has ADHD and Tourettes and MANY years were spent trying to figure out what was going on and dealing with it. When I look back on those years, I cringe at how difficult they were and how easy life is now compared to that.

My kids are now 16, 12 and 11 and I LOVE the people they're becoming. I love spending time with them individually and together. There's less stress and strife in our lives. Our son is doing REALLY well as a high schooler (with help from his IEP) and the girls are lovely middle schoolers.

So, no, I'm not sad at all about them growing up. I'm excited and happy about the wonderful people they're becoming. I'm looking forward to the future and to our adult parent/child relationships.

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K.S.

answers from Detroit on

I'd call it wistful. I work to remember moments at different ages. I also work to enjoy current moments.

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D.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I wouldn't say sad, but sometimes I do feel sentimental. I can't believe how fast it has gone by, and that my time being a mom to a baby is over.

On the other hand - my 7 year old learned to do laundry this week. And both my kids (7 and 3) can help unload the dishwasher. SCORE for me!

On a more serious note, I also love seeing the people that they are turning into :)

Every stage has its own great aspects (and its own frustrations).

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J.O.

answers from Detroit on

No. It's exciting. I love it.

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K.A.

answers from San Diego on

It doesn't make me sad actually. It makes me excited for the future. It freaks me out sometimes when I think how close they are getting to things like driving cars and stuff. But it never makes me sad. I love watching my 3 grow up!

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❤.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Every once in awhile. Otherwise I'm pretty present & am enjoying all of
the new stages.
Each stage is so fun for me.
I am amazed, fulfilled and happy at their growth so I try to stay focused
on that.

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T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

No I love it!
I'm excited for each new stage, walking, talking, preschool, high school and I now have two in college!
Sure I get a little melancholy sometimes, especially when I look at photos or see some of their baby stuff, but watching them grow from tiny, helpless creatures into fully grown people is amazing.
I feel so proud of them, and it makes me feel like I've done a good job :-)

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

My kids are 10, 8, and 6. When I type that or say it, it seems unreal to me. I can't believe they are growing so fast. My mom says the same thing to me when she says her kids ages (32, 30 (me), 28, 26, and 24). Life goes by so quickly it's unreal.

But does it make me sad? Not really. Because if it made me sad, then would I really be able to enjoy all of the new things that come up with them growing and changing? I used to get sad...but there is no point in it. Getting sad won't stop them from growing up, it will only hinder your ability to enjoy it.

Try to enjoy it...every day, even the tough ones.

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J.B.

answers from Houston on

Nope. That's what life is all about.

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L.U.

answers from Seattle on

Sometimes.
But most of the time I am just enjoying who they are becoming! My boys are 11 and 8 and my daughter is almost 3. My youngest two are a handful but they are pretty great kids. I love watching my daughter laugh at funny things, I love watching my 8 year old BE the funny thing, I love my 11 year old understanding "older" jokes. I love watching them march to their own drums and become leaders. I love seeing them learn how to be empathetic, sympathetic, and wonderful young people.
Do I miss the baby stage? Oh sure. But I am really enjoying the stage we are at now.
Ask me again when I have two teens and I may have a different story!
L.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

Didn't make me sad. That's what they're supposed to do.

And I definitely don't miss dirty diapers and colic.

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F.B.

answers from New York on

Consider the alternative- They could not grow up. I'll take growing older every day.

Best,
F. B.

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M.L.

answers from Colorado Springs on

It's that time thing! You know - that time thing that is NOT in our control? No matter how we plan and what we try to do, time goes on inexorably. We can't stop it, reverse it, do anything with it except the best we can. We can try to forget it, of course - only to be slapped in the face with it when - well, when our oldest starts kindergarten.

On the other hand, if your children didn't grow up, there would be a MAJOR problem there.

This is the time to be thankful for everything about your children so far. They're moving along from stage to stage, and you want to remember the good things (journal them, maybe?) and look forward to whatever adventures happen now.

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S.W.

answers from Amarillo on

No, I don't feel sad. This is life we start out not knowing anything and we learn and grow and become better. we learn what we need to know in the first 13 years of life to help us survive the rest of our lives (hopefully).

Each phase has its own excitement and feelings of achievement in the lives our child(ren). You have to sit back and watch and remember how you felt when you were that age.

Children are here in our homes for a short time and we need to remember that and enjoy them before they go off and live their own lives. We must know that we have done our best to prepare them for this important step in their life -- living on their own.

I enjoy my adult children as much if not more than when they were little. They will always be "little" to me even if they are 40 and 36. I still find clothes from them that they wore at 6 months to 5 years (hats, scarves, swimsuits, tops, pants when I clean up or out closets.

the other S.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

It makes me feel a little sad.
Because I mourn my passing youth a bit - the age I was when my son was new..
Mostly it makes me feel proud.
There are some kids who can't grow up or develop normally.
They are stuck with the intellect of an infant or small child and can't develop beyond it.
They'll be in diapers forever and never become independent self sufficient adults capable of raising their own families.
They'll need constant care until their parents / relatives are too old to care for them themselves and then need to be in a care home.
There are worse things than growing up.
A child growing more or less normally is a thing to be celebrated!
And that makes me very happy!

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A.G.

answers from Dallas on

I love watching my boys grow older! I've always enjoyed older children; that's probably why I love teaching high school so much. Now my boys are 9 and almost 16, and we have so much fun together. We've really had fun together at every stage, but I love the conversations that we have now.

That being said, my oldest is starting to look at colleges now. Although I am so proud of the young man he is becoming, and he isn't even looking at schools far away, I tear up whenever I think of him moving out. I want him to move out and be independent, but the thought of it actually happening . . . well, I'm not ready to think about it yet.

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D.D.

answers from New York on

Nope. My kids are 25 - 32 yrs old. I've been excited for every change they've gone through as they've grown to be productive adults in the world. I think it's always natural to feel a loss for the things that make up your routine as your children grow (oh how I miss a house filled with dinosaurs from my son and Thomas the Tank engine with my grandsons) but it's much easier if you celebrate their successes as they grown up instead of crying over what isn't any more.

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C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

Mommy,

I have an adult daughter...she's 27...that means I'm going to be 48 soon!! YIKES!!!

My boys are 11 & 13. My youngest will be in middle school next year. My oldest son will be in High School next year.

I too wonder where all the time went. I sit back and see the years blur by. I try to make good memories when I can!! Overall though? No. I'm happy and excited to see the young men my boys are becoming and the adult my daughter has become.

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S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

oh, this is so funny and sweet. i remember moving into our first house with our 2 year old, and looking at the boy next door who was almost kindergarten age and thinking 'how weird it must be to have kids that old!'
i expected this post to be about empty nesting. hee!
to answer your question, yes, but in a wonderful bittersweet sort of way. i've loved each phase of my boys' lives (including the dreaded teen years) so i've never wished them a different age, but yeah, there's always a sense of mourning for the little fellows they were.
so funny that this question comes up this morning. i dreamed as i was drifting toward wakefulness that the boys came home, but my younger was the sweet, diffident, adorable, pugdy tween he used to be, not the buff laughing extrovert he is today. at first i was surprised, but then it was sooooooooo wonderful to have my little guy back again, even for those few brief moments before the dream shifted and i woke all the way up.
take a moment to wallow in the sweet sadness of your babies changing before you, but don't get stuck there! it's part of the wonder and delight of motherhood.
:) khairete
S.

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A.V.

answers from Washington DC on

Yes and no. I miss specific things at specific ages, but I love to see them grow and blossom. Listening to DD read for the first time was like hearing her first words for me. Whole worlds are open to her now, and I am excited to see where she takes it.

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K.F.

answers from New York on

When my son was little I couldn't wait to see him hit those treasured benchmarks. I anticipated them so much. I forgot to enjoy right where he was when he was a little guy.

He's now 19 and I really love the fact that he is a legal adult and preparing for life beyond my borders. It is a beautiful thing.

Enjoy them as much as you can. Laugh often because the tough teenage years come in and then they are off to college or adulthood. It really only lasts a short time but it seems long when you in the worst of it and very short when you don't treasure the best of it.

I'm just proud to have such a remarkable human being for a son.

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M.J.

answers from Sacramento on

Absolutely not. The older they've gotten, the more we've been able to do with them. We can take them to museums and fancy restaurants, for example. It's awesome to go on a long car trip and know they can keep themselves entertained and not have potty accidents. It's rare that they wake us up in the middle of the night, and if they do, we know they're likely sick (so there's a valid reason). They can fix their own snacks.

I love watching their growing independence. I love seeing the next steps in their journeys to adulthood. It's fun to see them learn new things at school and eagerly share their new knowledge.

Embrace the changes because so many things get easier and better as they get older.

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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

You have so many exciting and fun times coming up in your future as a family. You can do so much more with older kids and their accomplishments are bigger and more exciting to witness.

Raise them to be confident, interesting people and you'll have a lifetime of great experiences and memories with them. Each stage brings new ways to relate and a more mature and diverse relationship.

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M.W.

answers from San Francisco on

I wouldn't personally describe it as "sad".

I know what you mean though. I am loving the stage we are in right now...13,11 and 7. They are all super independent and outgoing. I try to shift the "sadness" more on the excitement of watching their personalities develop and them becoming their own person. I love to see them caring about others,helping others and also making mistakes then picking themselves up and learning from it and trying better. Our oldest just went on a study abroad exchange program to Japan. It was so exciting to hear about his adventures away from home. Gave me a glimpse into our future when he leaves the nest and explores the wide world on his own.

Yours are still so young. Enjoy each stage and love them all up one side and down the other. Give them wings to fly on their own as they venture out a little bit at a time. Kindergarten is a huge milestone for parents and the child. It is everyone's first big school experience. It is a new world that opens up to all of you with so many real life experiences of disappointment,learning, trial and error, social interactions, working with a professional who has your child's grades in their hand etc.

All three of ours are in all day school and I am still home full time. I am loving the time I have to get a bunch of projects and chores done around the house, shopping and exercising without a trail of kiddos nipping at my knees. I love the time I have now to read a book when I want, take a nap or go on a day trip with gal pals...or meet up with my cute hubby for lunch date :)

Learn to treasure and enjoy each stage.... then there will be less sadness. I do know that I will sure enjoy the early baby stage more when they are grand babies. I loved having babies and nursing each one for over a year...but it was dang hard. I can't wait for the freedom when our kids are out of the nest so my husband and I can travel the world without scheduling babysitters,meals, carpools etc. We can just drop everything and just...go.

I adore our kids...and I am loving being a mom. I look forward to when they come home each day so we can chat about the day and the house is filled with their energy. But...I will also be excited for the day when they come home with their spouses and brood of kids for a visit and it will fill our home with even more excitement and energy. I can't wait for that stage too!!!

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P.M.

answers from Portland on

I love snuggling, watching and interacting with babies, and missed that when my daughter got too big to sit comfortably on my lap. Same with my grandson, now going on 8. So there is that piece of it. In fact, when my only daughter was a tiny, I was a little worried that I wouldn't be able to enjoy her as much as she grew bigger than my arms could hold.

Turned out not to be a problem. For me, watching children grow up is spectacular. Being able to talk in greater depth, helping them acquire new skills an understanding, watching them figure out life, is so immensely engaging that I don't have much time to invest in what's past. Plus, lovely young mothers around me are having the occasional baby, so I can still enjoy cuddling them. And I do!

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C.O.

answers from Minneapolis on

I does and it doesn't. Makes me sad to see my babies not being babies anymore. My son is 9 years old and my daughter is 6 years old. But at the same time I love seeing them growing up, their personalities and things they like and don't like. They make me proud.

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E.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

No, I'm not sad they're growing up. I'm nostalgic for the times when they were younger, but I try to focus on all the cool new things we get to experience as they're growing up.

My youngest is about to turn 3, so we've left diapers, naps and diaper bags in the dust! If we want to go somewhere, we just GO :) Of course I miss those years of snuggling them as tiny babies.....but my body is now my own (after breastfeeding for a total of almost 4 years between 3 kids) and I sleep through the night.

I love the ideas my older kids come up with and have the neatest conversations with them. They're not just little kids anymore, they're growing into interested little people. And it's pretty cool.

Try not to focus on how fast time is passing. Instead, focus on each new stage your children enter and enjoy it. Before you know it, they'll be moving out and you'll have all these wonderful memories of the years with your kids instead of moping about how fast time is passing.

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S.B.

answers from Houston on

No not really. My kids are 25 and 21. They are wonderful, productive members of society and just great adults. I feel like my husband and I did a pretty darn good job with them!

Our oldest has a college degree, a well paying job, very happy and she can and is supporting herself. Yay! Very proud mom here!

Our son is in college, national guard and ROTC and also part time job. He is a terrific young man and has come a long way! I'm so proud of him!!!

I look at their pictures when they were little, but I don't feel grief or sadness, I feel joy because they grew to be wonderful young people. I feel blessed.

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J.S.

answers from Richland on

No, not at all. That is what they are supposed to do. It would make me sad if my kids weren't hitting their independent milestones.

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M.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

It does make me sad. My 10yr old is almost as tall as me and it is amazing to me how much she is changing. She is becoming her own person and it is hard for me to step back on all the "mommying". I am finding a new way to handle things with her and she is responding much better. It is hard to realize that she is not a baby anymore and in fact is not far from teenage. It's a very hard realization, it seems like just yesterday she was so excited to go to kindergarten and this year she started fifth grade. Its so sad to loose that baby, but I am intrigued by the person that she is becoming. I am also enjoying the new relationship we are discovering as she is on more of a relatable level now. So yes it's sad, but embrace the change.
Good Luck

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L.C.

answers from Dover on

Sometimes it makes me a little sad but I have realized that each new age range, hallmark period, milestone - whatever you want to call it - has some really cool things to offer it. I have loved some aspect of the current phase my kids were in during every phase so far and you trade one really cool thing for another and it totally evens out. The teenage years are a little hairy sometimes, but even those have some really cool aspects.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Aw, sure, I think all Moms feel bittersweet about it.
.... my kids are 11 and 7.
My son is the youngest.
Gosh darn it, he is growing up, 2nd grade.
Taller.
Good grief!
Makes one want to have another baby.
But no, reality is, no.
But I "miss" the baby days.
But well... seeing your kids grow up, is a Rite Of Passage and "growing pains" for a Mom. And developmentally.
LOL!

My daughter is 11, in middle school this year.
Good grief.
But she is still a kid.
And age appropriate.
Not one of those 11 year olds that think they are 14 or 15.
She still calls me "Mommy" not "Ma" or "Mom."
She will still hug me in front of her friends and is not embarrassed by me with her and her friends.
She thinks I'm cool.
She even said she has the best Mommy.
And she told me one day "I hope I don't turn into a yucky teenager... when I'm that age."
We'll see, honey.

My son, gosh darn it, he's my "baby." Being he is the youngest.
He still hugs me in front of his friends.
And calls me Mommy. Some of his friends won't.
I told him "you are growing up too fast....!" And he says "But Mommy, I have to grow and I'll be like Daddy one day.... but I'm always your boy...."
I almost cried.

I'm close with each of my kids, in different ways.
It's hard seeing them get older....

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S.A.

answers from Chicago on

Yes. My youngest is 4, and started preschool this fall. It was so hard for me to let him go because I didn't have another baby still at home. Every time I've had one start preschool, I've had another baby. I am having a very hard time accepting the end of the baby season in my life. My oldest is 11 and in middle school. I took her for basketball photos the other night, and she was standing with her team waiting to have their pictures taken. I was very melancholy looking at that group of big girls who most of them, I've known since they were 3. I can't believe that they only have 2.5 more years at our school until they go to high school. And my middle is in 2nd grade. He's making his first Reconciliation tonight, and his 1st Communion in May. It truly seems like yesterday that my oldest was doing that.

Why can't time slow down just a little?

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R.X.

answers from Houston on

Think about the look on a father's face when he gives away his daughters in marriage. That is the best answer.

Yes it's bittersweet.

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Nope! I was glad to see the baby years gone. Each year I look forward to the next to see what changes are coming. I look forward, not back.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

Enjoy this time.

For me, am I sad about my son growing up? NO. I am thankful that we sleep all through the night now most nights. I am happy that I am reading books to him with more interesting content; glad that he knows what the routine is most days. I am enjoying that he's old enough to do things like go to a museum or the nickel arcade or go out for an afternoon adventure without getting tired or needing a nap.

Do I miss the cuddly baby stage? Yep, but not all the other wee child stuff that goes with it.

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I.S.

answers from Sacramento on

For me, it is sad. I truly miss those baby stages of watching him accomplish little things. Sure I get to look forward to much more, but that happy, loving, I need my mommy stage is surely going away. That is what I will miss the most. Being wanted :)

I look back at his baby pictures all the time and tear up. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE the age he is right now 5.5. But i miss the minute he see's me, he lights up. Or always wearing a smile on his face, just because. Now too much attitude, too much talking back, blah blah blah. I have to work that much harder to get a smile or a laugh :( oh well...i still love my lil man regardless.

Plus my son is everything to me. He is the reason i get up, smile, laugh, get angry, feel unconditional love....something I will truly miss more then mentioning it when he becomes a man and starts his own life. My role is mom and dad, and would never change that for anything.

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S.C.

answers from Chicago on

Oh girl. I know what you mean. People, it's not that we sit and CRY that they're aging, it's that we realize in a blink, they'll be off to college! Sometimes I can just see it happening before my eyes and that's when I have moments where I do, honestly, feel a little sad that everyone is growing up so fast.

I love my little trio and ah, I'm so incredibly proud of every accomplishment, I delight in their milestones, and I'm so happy to see them turning into such AWESOME kids. I don't miss being up all night for years. But I do sometimes wish time would slow down. I hear you, mama! :)

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

YES! I get sad when I think that my baby is 8 months old. I keep thinking she will be weaned soon...and I get sad when I think about my sons 4fh bday party...time just goes so fast.

Maybe it's a hormonal post-partum thing, a watching of a baby turn into a toddler and seeing babyhood disappear..so our genetic makeup makes us sad so we have more!

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K.D.

answers from Milwaukee on

I was kind of sad that mine didn't want to go trick or treating this year but in general-no, I am not sad to see them growing up.

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D.W.

answers from Norfolk on

it makes me sad a lot too! my oldest is 14 and my only boy :(

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M.T.

answers from New York on

No, it never makes me sad. My kids are 14 and 18 now. When they were 3 and 7, I had cancer. I am never, ever sad to see them hit a milestone, to spend another year with them. A close friend who was diagnosed around the same time as me, died when our boys were nine. I've seen my son get his Arrow of Light, graduate elementary and middle school, achieve his Star rank, go on his first date recently, all kinds of things that my friend never got to see her son do. I've gotten to see my daughter have her sweet 16, go to the prom twice, teach her to drive, see her accepted by every college she applied to, win an art show, win scholarships and graduate from HS on her 18th birthday. It is a privilege for me to to see each of these things. I am excited to be forming a new, adult relationship with my daughter.

Your children are still very young. Enjoy every moment, but don't be sad about those moments passing and moving on to the next wonderful stage. Be glad that you are there with your children to see all of the ages and stages, and experience them with your kiddos.

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S.C.

answers from Los Angeles on

When my daughter started Kinder I cried, she didn't Lol but gosh I love watching them grow and just being there with them (even though sometimes they don't) seeing them experience life. I just love being a Mom wouldn't trade it for the world :)

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K.B.

answers from Detroit on

I do get a little nostalgic for certain things, but now that my daughter is 6 and in 1st grade, there honestly is not much I miss about the toddler phase. Right now, in many ways, life is much easier. She is in school full-time and more independent. I don't have to constantly help her and do everything for her. She is easier to reason with (usually). I remember it being a challenge to keep her constantly entertained and engaged all day and I was so happy when she had preschool to go to, and then kindergarten. Now first grade brings more homework and school stuff and sometimes I get annoyed with how much they are expected to do, which sometimes makes wish she were in preschool again - as they go further in school, the expectations are higher. But sad? Not really...growing up is what they are supposed to do. Having a child that had issues that prevented them from ever "growing up" or developing normally, or losing them altogether, is much worse.

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H.L.

answers from Houston on

Not. At. All. Mine is 2, and I thoroughly enjoy watching him go from stage to stage, learning and figurign things out, stepping into new territory. People are always saying how quickly this has all happened and how time flies. I'm not in that space. Time has not just flown. I have been very present every day and take none of it for granted.

People told me not to hold him, to force him to sit and play alone, so he wouldn't always need a lap. My choice was to let him tell me when he no longer needed my lap. One day I was sitting with him, and he climbed down to the floor and sat there. Then, he started exploring. I didn't have to force him or even suggest it to him. At 10 months, someone was going on and on about time flying and "he's almost 1!" I told her that he was not "almost 1", but he was "10 months". I told her that I was taking it day by day, staying in each moment. I wasn't ready to think of him as a 1yo at that time. When he turned 1, it felt like it was right on time.

I think that time flies for people who--for some reason or another--don't live in each moment and feel like they are missing out on certain things. I have missed NOTHING. I don't care if the years fly by at work. I pretty much stay in the moment there, too, but my focus is on what I do at home. I pay attention to all the details.

It makes me feel proud and joyful to watch my baby develop right before my eyes. I am pleased with the love and care that he has experienced and the effect that I see it having on him. I am proud to watch as the decisions that I make for his life are helping to groom him into the joy that he just always is. I don't ever feel like I want the world to stop so I can take it all in. I just rearrange all the other stuff going on in my life, so I can be present in these moments.

I also don't compare and contrast his accomplishments with those of other children. Maybe that helps. We play it all by ear, just making sure that he is healthy and happy and has what we think is an appropriate understanding of how to treat other people. He'll be three years old in two months, but I don't think of him at all as an almost 3yo. He is 2. Until he's 3.

ETA: Now, what does make me sad--kinda--is that the older he gets, the older my husband and I get and the closer I have to be to deciding whether or not I want to convince my husband to do this again. The further we get from having a baby around, the easier it is not to have a baby around.

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T.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

It does make me said. I still want to hold my daughter but she is very long and it's difficult. Sometimes I will tell her to let me hold her like a baby. She will sit for a few minutes and then she's off to the next thing. I wanted her to stay a baby but I am excited to see the girl she is growing into. She has a good imagination and good sense of humor so she is really fun now but sometimes I do long for the baby days.

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A.C.

answers from Washington DC on

Each kid starting school was a treasure to me. It gave me time with the other two.

Now that I have One living in another state going to college, One working on going into the Air Force and one that only has 2 1/2 years left of high school .... WOOOOHOOOOOOOOOOOO.

No it hasn't made me sad. Although leaving my only girl in another state wasn't easy and I shed my share of tears. I look forward to the next stages of life.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

I only have 1 kid. I love seeing him grow up and gain independence. He's 10 now. I do think I will miss the day when he stops giving hugs freely and generously.

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S.G.

answers from Lakeland on

Not at all. I couldn't wait for them to grow up and be on there own. I still have one left at the house and one out of the house. My sister has 4 kids and she tries to keep all of them at home. She doesn't want anyone of them leave.
Everyone's different.

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K.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

really sad-but just wait til you hit empty nest syndrome-it was pure hell for me-all of a sudden it was empty n to quiet..enjoy it to the fullest while you still can...

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J.C.

answers from New York on

I only have one so YES, it makes me very sad. I at times question my decision to have only one - but it made sense to me. I still feel guilty for the decision a lot. Guilty to have denied myself another baby, guilty not giving her a sibling. But again, I think it was right for me.

J.S.

answers from Hartford on

No. I miss certain stages, especially when particular current stages make me want to crawl into a hole and stuff them into ... uh... you get what I'm saying. :-)

But no, I'm not sad. Each new stage brings new challenges and joys. I don't miss the time that's gone because that's a waste of the current time that I could be enjoying them now.

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