HELP! I Can't Get My 5 Month Old to Sleep in His Crib

Updated on December 20, 2007
S.D. asks from Westmont, IL
9 answers

I'm at my wits end... my now 5 month old is not sleeping in his crib. He had surgery about 4 weeks ago and is still recovering so we are trying to be easy on him for the time being. Prior to surgery he slept in a cradle in our room or in bed with us! We had to do whatever it took to keep him from crying due to his heart condition (thankfully now that he has been "repaired" that is no longer an issue!). I have read tons of books - Weissbluth, Sears, Ferber, Baby Wise, etc... and now I think I have too much advice. My son still startles himself awake and seems to be comforted by touch and things surrounding him. Is there any safe way to surround a baby with something in their crib so that when they reach out they feel enclosed and not like some small thing in a HUGE crib? I'm looking for suggestions at ways to approach this, but right now when we put him down he sleeps for 45 minutes at best and that it starting all over again. Thanks, Moms! I need some encouragement and a plan of attack! :)

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A.D.

answers from Chicago on

Hi there. Babies like to feel snug, so a crib is not the ideal place for a baby. What I did with my first two babies was roll up two towels and place them under a blanket. I would then place baby in between the towels with the towel roll begining at the neck not the top of the head. The babies would not get startled as easily and would feel cuddled and snug. I also had a baby mozart CD playing lightly in the background. I never placed the baby in the crib while awake. I first craddle until a light sleep and then place them in the crib with a baby washcloth close to their hand so they can grab something without it being a danger, since it was too small. My currant baby is 8 months. She does not need the towel rolls, but she does like to hold on to something. I use the diaper clothes as diaper rags to clean her spit or clean her after eating. She enjoys to crawl around with one in her hand so we use that as her "safety blankee". Good Luck.

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A.

answers from Chicago on

Hi,

I can sympathize with you. We went through the same thing with my son. He had a heart condition as well(not as serious as yours sounds, but it was a heart condition none the less and needed surgery to be fixed). However he had surgery right after his first birthday and he was just plain SCARED of being in his crib. Obviously, being one he was a lot more aware of things but we basically spent over a week of him just sleeping in our arms. Finally we had to let him try and fall asleep himself. So for a few days, we'd rock him till he was almost asleep and then put him down. He would wake up of course and scream but we always used the cry it out (CIO)method and we gave him some time before we went in. After almost another week of doing this, one night we just let him CIO. It took almost an (unbearable) hour of him crying but he finally fell asleep and things got better from then on. It was very tough to hear him crying especially since he had just had surgery 2 weeks ago... but we weren't sleeping, there was no way we could function to take care of him the rest of the time. I don't know what method you plan on using, but whatever it is, I think you kind of have to harden yourself and let him cry for a while. I know you aren't used to it because you had to get him earlier for health reasons but for your own sanity sake, do try. I know how hard it is. I've been there. Hang in there!!! All will be well.

Good luck and email me if you have any questions.
Aarti.

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K.C.

answers from Chicago on

Please do not worry you are being too "easy" on him, he's 5 months old. I believe different babies have different needs and maybe he needs the comfort and stimulation provided by having a parent close by. Is it possible for you to keep him in your bed and transition him to his crib when he's ready for that? After going through surgery and all that he needs you now more than ever to be responsive to his needs. I have 2 sons, 1 that slept in a crib and 1 that NEVER slept in a crib and my second son is MUCH better adjusted and well ahead of the curve in his development.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do!

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C.M.

answers from Bloomington on

My daughter has similar sleeping problems - I call it the princess syndrome. I have had her sleeping in a pack-n-play since she was 4 months old or so. However, I use a foam pad from JoAnn fabrics that is 3 inches thick. I had it cut to length and then had a strip to shove in the side so there are no gaps. It sits on top of the cardboard or whatever that bottom piece is. I cover it with a regular crib mattress pad and sheet and just tuck the extra under the foam or cardboard. She snuggles into the netting on the side and is still comfortable. Even though it's not ideal, I also used a bed-sized pillow to elevate her head a little when she has reflux or congestion. It fits width-wise, so she would have to grab under it to pull it up.

She's 9 months now and when I had her at my parents' house for Thanksgiving, she would only sleep a couple hours at a time in their nice wooden crib. The only other way she will sleep is if I'm cuddling her, but then I don't get sleep - and I won't put up with that.

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A.

answers from Chicago on

The safest way to surround your baby is to swaddle him. We swaddled our daughter until 7 months. The Miracle Blanket was our best bet. She was a big baby, and it still kept her nice and snug.

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S.C.

answers from Fort Wayne on

I know this is a HUGE no no, but have you tried a blanket or a lovey? My mom made my dd an afghan. It has big holes and is thin enough that if she pulls it over her head, she can still breath. Another thing you could try is a dirty t-shirt of yours and your husbands. They will have the smells of Mommy and Daddy on them. As I said, my daughter has slept with a blanket since the day she was born. A sleep positioner may work, but only if he can't roll over.

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M.R.

answers from Chicago on

Maybe try a sleep positioner, so he gets the feeling of being 'boxed in' and snuggled?

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E.Z.

answers from Indianapolis on

hello Sarah
Join the club! My first child, (Natalie now 2 yrs), slept in our bed until she was 11 months. I tried to put her in her crib but it didn't work and I really didn't mind sharing our bed with her, it was the cutest feeling in this world. When she was 11 months, it was easier to put her in her crib and tolerate her crying. Until now, we sometimes let her in our bed and when she hugs any of us, it means the world to us. So my advice is keep trying but if it doesn't work, don't give up or get frustrated. Eeventually they will have their own room. So enjoy it while you have to deal with it. Good luck :)

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J.

answers from Chicago on

Is he too big to swaddle? Definitely try that. You could try sleep sacks and see if those keep him a little more immobile. My older son also startled awake after about 45 minutes. A very frustrating problem to have. It seemed to be worse if he started out tired. Also, it helped to put him down awake, but I know that's difficult advice when they fall asleep at the breast/bottle.

I know what you mean about the big empty crib - neither of my children liked sleeping that way. With my second son, we bought an amby sleep hammock (which I would recommend, it's perfect for your needs, except that it's pricey and he'd only be able to use it for a few more months before he outgrew it.)

I'm nervous, especially with the medical history, to recommend things like blankets in the crib, but check with your pediatrician on this idea that one of my friends used. She would use a very light but largish blanket (like a receiving blanket, but bigger - you could even use a small sheet) and tuck it under the sides of the mattress but over the baby's body. So his head would be out, but the rest of his body would be held down by the blanket, which was tucked in on both sides. Her baby had that same startle thing, and it really helped.

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