Help! in Need of Advice on Helping My 8 Yr Old to Stop Wetting the Bed.

Oh My GOD! Sorry to be so dramatic, but punish??? No, no, no!! Please, do NOT listen to anyone who would suggest this. First off, do you think he enjoys peeing the bed? Does anyone here think it would be fun to wake up from a nice warm slumber, shivering and soaked with urine??? I kind of doubt that. So, I guess so long as you know he isn't doing it for "fun". Then, hear me out. My grandparents wet the bed, my Mom and Uncle wet the bed, my sister, brother and myself all wet the bed. For some, it is in the family, for others, it could be behavioral, he could be a deep sleeper, etc.. My Mom did all the stuff for me that you have done for your son, I took pills, I had the alarm. We didn't have the great pull ups that they have these days so I was left to soak my sleeping bags at sleepovers. My Mom had a plastic cover on our mattresses and changing the sheets was just pretty much routine. She NEVER got mad and I never felt bad about this. Afterall, I was upset enough and hard enough on myself about this, thank God, she was understanding. I didn't outgrow this until I was a young adult. As for my siblings, I can't remember but I seem to recall my sister was done around 11. My mother in law just recently told me that my husband wet the bed as well. For two weeks, she got up twice a night and took him to the bathroom. She swears on this method. I know you said you already get him up but every two hours might be too often. I sympathize with you and your son and hope you'll find some good support here. I'm posting below an article I found that had some good information.
M.

Bedwetting

No. 18; Updated November 2002

Most children begin to stay dry at night around three years of age. When a child has a problem with bedwetting (enuresis) after that age, parents may become concerned.

Physicians stress that enuresis is not a disease, but a symptom, and a fairly common one. Occasional accidents may occur, particularly when the child is ill. Here are some facts parents should know about bedwetting:

Approximately 15 percent of children wet the bed after the age of three
Many more boys than girls wet their beds
Bedwetting runs in families
Usually bedwetting stops by puberty
Most bedwetters do not have emotional problems
Persistent bedwetting beyond the age of three or four rarely signals a kidney or bladder problem. Bedwetting may sometimes be related to a sleep disorder. In most cases, it is due to the development of the child's bladder control being slower than normal. Bedwetting may also be the result of the child's tensions and emotions that require attention.

There are a variety of emotional reasons for bedwetting. For example, when a young child begins bedwetting after several months or years of dryness during the night, this may reflect new fears or insecurities. This may follow changes or events which make the child feel insecure: moving to a new home, parents divorce, losing a family member or loved one, or the arrival of a new baby or child in the home. Sometimes bedwetting occurs after a period of dryness because the child's original toilet training was too stressful.
Parents should remember that children rarely wet on purpose, and usually feel ashamed about the incident. Rather than make the child feel naughty or ashamed, parents need to encourage the child and express confidence that he or she will soon be able to stay dry at night. Parents may help children who wet the bed by:

Limiting liquids before bedtime
Encouraging the child to go to the bathroom before bedtime
Praising the child on dry mornings
Avoiding punishments
Waking the child during the night to empty their bladder
Treatment for bedwetting in children includes behavioral conditioning devices (pad/buzzer) and/or medications. Examples of medications used include anti-diuretic hormone nasal spray and the anti-depressant medication imipramine. In rare instances, the problem of bedwetting cannot be resolved by the parents, the family physician or the pediatrician. Sometimes the child may also show symptoms of emotional problems--such as persistent sadness or irritability, or a change in eating or sleeping habits. In these cases, parents may want to talk with a child and adolescent psychiatrist, who will evaluate physical and emotional problems that may be causing the bedwetting, and will work with the child and parents to resolve these problems.

My only advice is: Buy him some large pull-ups and leave him alone. My daughter wet her bed until she was 10 and I wet the bed until I was 9. I will be honest, punishing her was the worst thing I could have done because she was already feeling awful about wetting, not to mention miserable and icky.

She's 23 now and once in awhile will ask me why I was so hateful about her problem. What was done will never go away and it scars them.

When I finally got it through my thick skull that punishment wasn't the correct approach was when a woman I worked with told me, "Honey, nobody ever goes to college and still wets the bed, leave your daughter alone". LOL! Simple advice but the best I'd gotten.

D., just a thought but is he getting chilled at night. I was a bed wetter and my mom discovered that when I got chilled/cold I would wet my bed. She kept my room a little warmer and had me wear warmer jammies. Has there been any testing done to check your son's bladder? Are there any signs of infection? Or have they done an ultrasound to check if he possibly has an under developed bladder. There are just so many possibilities with this situation. I'm sorry I couldn't be of more help.

My daughter was a little younger when she was having this problem. We found that it didn't matter how much she had to drink. It was just how tired she was. If she went to bed exhausted we knew she would wet the bed. We actually set our alarm for 3 am and took her to the bathroom because if we did it any earlier than that she would still wet.

My friend's oldest son of the same age is also a bedwetter, and they've also tried it all. Her research and discussions with the pediatrician indicate that they simply have to outgrow it. This makes sense because I am sure they are not choosing to wet the bed and if they could help it, they would. I am sure he won't be wetting the bed forever. If I were you, I would just try to survive it and be patient. Good Luck.

someone just told me about a device that is pain free to the child that is supposed to work within 1 week. It is a little device that you clip on the underwear and close to the ear and when the first drop wets the underwear it sounds a small alarm and wakes the child up to go to the bathroom. does not hurt the child in anyway just interrupts their deep sleep. forget the medicines they do not work. also no liquids 1 hour before bedtime and go to the bathroom before bed.

Huggies Goodnights or pullups. Ask a urologist if his urethra is too small, or if his bladder needs to be stretched. Some guys just can't wake up at night. Nephew wet until 12. He's a fireman and good dad of 2 boys. He made it, so will your guy.