Help- My Baby Bites Me!

Updated on June 14, 2008
L.S. asks from Seattle, WA
38 answers

My nine month old has started biting my nipples when he's nursing. Today he drew blood (a small amount but it hurt!). He thinks "no" is funny. "Stop" is just as funny, and if you say those words, he'll giggle and then bite intentionally. I've tried the Dr Sears "push the baby's face into the nipple" and that doesn't work for us at all. I usually just stop feeding him, deciding that he can't be all that hungry if he'd rather chomp than suck. What to do?

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So What Happened?

Thanks everyone! I really appreciate all of the responses.
So it's gotten better. I really think it may have been primarily a teething thing because his fourth tooth just popped through and he doesn't seem as interested in biting anymore. I will say that I did get frustrated one day, took him off the breast and just said "NO, STOP IT!!!", which got a bit of a cry out of him. I felt guilty but it may have helped. Let's hope he doesn't start up again with the next teething session.

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K.K.

answers from Portland on

Hi L.,

I had the same problem with my 8month old. I say no bite and take it away. If he acts like he wants more I give him some, but if he bites, I say all done and take it away. I have found that when they bite, they aren't hungry and are just using you as a teething toy. Hope this helps.

Good luck,
K.

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T.J.

answers from Seattle on

They usually bite to either get a reaction or they're done eating. What has worked for me (twice now!) is pushing in their cheek with my finger and ending the feeding, saying "no biting". They will quickly figure out that biting means they're done eating! Hang in there, my second did it for three weeks before quitting, my first only three times.

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C.M.

answers from Medford on

I know this might sound cruel but I always gave my son a flick on his mouth when he bit me and said "no" very firmly! There is no reason for them to bite once you have said no. If he thinks it's funny you have to up the consequence for doing what he is doing. I can bet that one or two times of getting a flick on the mouth and he will stop doing it.

I disagree with the people who have advised weening, there is no reason to ween when your child can be taught.

Good luck!

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M.B.

answers from Seattle on

L.,

Both of my kids went through this at younger ages, but what I did worked. Each time they bit me while I was nursing I'd flick them on the cheek and sternly say No Bite. They only bit me a handful of times, then got the picture and didn't bite me anymore.

To this day they won't bite me. They're 4 1/2 years and 15 months.

Hope this helps,
Melissa

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J.M.

answers from Seattle on

I found that reacting with an "OUCH" or "No No!" encouraged my oldest to chomp more . . . I think he enjoyed being able to provoke such a fun and exciting reaction from Mama.

I would immediately insert my forefinger into his mouth when he chomped. (And I'd do my dead level best to show NO reaction - even when he drew blood.) I would sternly and quietly say, "no biting." And the feeding would be over! It didn't matter if we'd only just started. I would discontinue and pump. After no time at all he figured out that he'd better not chomp while he was hungry, so the chomping would start when he was full. I learned his pre-chomp cues (he would lean back to make sure to be able to look me in the eyes and would grin a little right before he'd get ready to clamp down. When he'd grin, he'd usually lose suction and I'd use the opportunity to slip a finger in his mouth before he could bite down.)

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R.R.

answers from Seattle on

I realize breast feeding is a special bonding between mother and child, I was unable to breast feed mine, But I do remember my mom telling a friend that when the child starts to bite, it is time for a bottle, she also felt that by 8 months a baby she be on a bottle at all times. She had a point about that, but I think at 9 months to a year old or walking a baby should only be breast feed at night before bed.
So put him on a bottle during the day,I seen they have some really great breast pumps on the market, and the bitting should stop, and if not, give up breast feeding.

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N.D.

answers from Portland on

i tried what you have (unsuccessfully) until finally one day i lost it and flicked my daughter on the cheek. she never did it again.

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

I know some will not agree with me, but if I were you I would ween. There are plenty of great formulas, and then he can't bite you.

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K.P.

answers from Richland on

You might try this on yourself first so that you can adjust the pressure as needed to be effective.

When he begins to bite down, place your middle finger and thumb on either side of his cheeks, and squeeze lightly, but firmly. This is uncomfortable for them, and they release immediately (at least my four have). Do this while using a firm voice and stern look to say "no biting". With mine, the stern look and voice got to them more than the discomfort, and they would pucker up and whimper just a little, almost as if they felt sorry for upsetting me. I usually only have to do this a couple of times, depending on the different personalities.

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J.A.

answers from Portland on

My baby hasn't gotten to that stage yet, but my mom told me that when we would bite her, she would give us a firm flick under the chin with her index finger. It doesn't hurt the baby, but it does startle the baby and make biting unpleasant. I can attest that none of us have developed attachment disorders or anything from it, and I'm going to use it if the time comes.

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D.D.

answers from Seattle on

It sounds a little barbaric - but it works. Bite him back on the arm. You don't have to bite hard. When I did this to my son after he bit me, he looked at me startled, but did't cry (as I said, don't bite hard enough to make him cry) but just enough to let them know what's going on. Say no, no and take the breast away for a little while, to show you mean business.

Children this age have no idea what they are doing with their bodies yet. They are learning. Until he knows what it is that's bothering you, he can't change it. He may not be aware that the biting is what's bothering you. He may only be aware that something is.

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H.O.

answers from Portland on

My daughter has done that on and off since about 9 months. When she did I would say no, pull my nipple out and tell her that hurt mommy. Then I would offer the other side. If she did it there she was done nursing for that feeding. She would still do it occasionally, but not often and if she was hungry or really wanted to nurse she didn't because she knew she wouldn't be able to if she bit me. Hope this helps.

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T.T.

answers from Seattle on

Both my children did the same. What worked for me, was to scream, remove the child and not nurse. If you are worried about his needing to eat, express some milk and place it into a bottle. This way, he bites, he does not get to nurse, but a bottle nipple which cannot feel.

The scream startles them, and removal is easier.

Good luck.

T.
2 kids (10 year girl, 6 year boy)
Work for home mom.

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C.M.

answers from Portland on

I had the same problem with my son and nursed him until he was one. He also thought it was funny when I said no. The only thing that worked for me was lightly flicking his lip when he bit me. I didn't hurt him, but it sure hurt his feelings. After 3 times of doing this he stopped completely. I felt a little mean beacause he was only 10 months, but it worked very quickly.

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K.K.

answers from Seattle on

Oh, I know that look of delight when they've gotten a reaction! Cute and annoying all at the same time :)

Babies can only bite if they release the latch and move their mouth back onto the nipple, so, if you're paying attention, you can tell when it's coming. Once they start to pull back, insert you finger into their mouth to break the latch and cover your nipple. It's up to you if you want to end the nursing session at this point or wait for a minute or two and then continue. I did this with my 9-month-old and it only took a few times before he got the idea.

And, yes, like you said, it's more likely to happen when they are bored, tired or full.

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M.S.

answers from Seattle on

OUCH!

I used to 'rattle' their teeth with my finger and at the same time say something like "no biting", "biting hurts momma" or "you must be done". Mine did it before nine months cuz they all seem to have gotten their teeth around 4 or 5 months. They all did it just a few times, so I knew they understood the rattling of the teeth thing.

Good luck!

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K.M.

answers from Seattle on

Each of my two sons tried biting me once or twice while nursing. Every time I yanked my breast away (mostly because that was the natural reaction) and then I would flick them on the chin with my finger saying "no bite". My youngest only did it once and my oldest did it the first time, then waited 2 months and tried biting again. When he got the same reaction, he didn't do it again. Something to try maybe.

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J.H.

answers from Portland on

Flick his cheek. I don't mean a little light flick but let him know that, that is not ok. It's the cause and effect. Bite mama=pain on my cheek, I don't like that, guess it's not worth it. All 4 of mine tried that and consistency with the flick worked. It may take several times but keep doing it and they get it, they are smart. My first boy would bite and drag, YOUCH!!!! I had bloody track marks. I was told the same thing to push into my breast or make no reaction and they will stop. Haha, I wonder if they were ever bit on the nipple?? It didn't work....Good luck

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A.B.

answers from Seattle on

As one of the other mom's responded, Nothing worked with the biting but a flick in the cheek. They only did it maybe about 4-6 times total after I started doing that and then they did not think that it was so funny any more, not to mention that my 2 boys are quite stubborn and have to learn things the hard way sometimes. Good luck, and I feel for your "pain".

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M.B.

answers from Seattle on

I've heard that if you make a loud noise like a scream it alarms them enough to not do it again. I don't know from personal experience, but I thought I'd throw that out there.

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D.R.

answers from Seattle on

Hi L.,

Here is an article from La Leche League regarding biting while breastfeeding! Hope you find it helpful!

What Should I Do If My Baby Bites Me?
Note: Please know that we are aware that babies come in two equally wonderful genders. For clarity, we are referring to your baby as "he" because mother is most certainly "she."

A bite from your baby can be truly painful, and worse, it keeps you tense in the fear that it will happen again. It's hard to relax and enjoy breastfeeding when your baby has bitten you. Babies who bite are seldom asking to be weaned. There are many reasons for a baby's biting, but the most common one is teething. Sometimes babies bite before their first teeth come in, but usually it's after the front teeth are in and the others are working their way down those hot, sore gums. Other reasons could be a cold or an ear infection (it's hard for your baby to swallow while breastfeeding if his nose is blocked), stress, or even a way of getting mother's undivided attention.

Here are some ideas to help reduce and eliminate biting. Remember: this may take persistence on your part. Your baby may not stop biting immediately but "this too shall pass."

When your baby is latched on correctly and nursing actively, getting milk from your breast and swallowing, it's physically impossible to bite. This is because your baby needs to stop sucking in order to bite. When latched on properly and nursing, your nipple is far back in your baby's mouth. In order to bite your baby has to adjust his tongue and allow your nipple to slide forward towards his teeth. So, as a first "hint" of when your baby is about to bite, try and watch for a moment--usually after the initial hunger has been satisfied--when your nipple slips forward in your baby's mouth. Often the tension in your baby's jaw will change just before this happens.
As soon as you notice this change, slip your finger into the corner of your baby's mouth, between his teeth, and let the nipple come out all the while keeping your finger in your baby's mouth to protect your nipple. Pulling your baby straight off is a very natural and almost automatic response, but it may cause soreness on your nipple.
Baby's position is important, and that means helping your baby stay in a close breastfeeding position, so that he doesn't or can't pull off very easily. If your baby has to strain to latch on, then he will come off and chew the nipple easily. Therefore, another response to biting that some mothers have found useful is to pull baby in closer to the breast, at least momentarily. If your baby begins to position himself away from your nipple, be alert for a possible bite.
When the cause of the problem is a cold, a more upright position can help your baby to breathe easier. Check with your baby's health care provider for suggestions to relieve stuffiness. Your baby may breastfeed better if you offer the breast while walking.
Sometimes older babies with teeth leave a "ring" of teethmarks after breastfeeding. Generally this is not painful and is caused by the teeth resting on the breast during breastfeeding. However, your baby may be clenching or sliding to the end of the nipple. If this is uncomfortable, use some of the same techniques listed in this FAQ to encourage your baby to gently latch on and breastfeed.

Maybe your baby is too young to understand exactly what you say, but your tone and attitude do convey meaning. It's worth trying to tell your baby, even repeatedly, that biting hurts and that he cannot bite you. Some alternatives mothers have used include:

Offer a teething ring and say, "Mommy is not for biting. You can bite this."
Use positive reinforcement. Praise your baby when he breastfeeds without biting. A hug or an extra cuddle will convey an important message.
Allow your baby to choose when to breastfeed. If baby is distracted and pulling off frequently, either try breastfeeding in a darkened room or begin a new activity with baby.

http://www.llli.org/FAQ/bite.html

R.S.

answers from Medford on

When my baby did that I would sternly say, "no" and with my finger poke her cheek. It did not hurt her mind you, but got her attention! I did that a few times and finally she stopped. Hope this has helped.

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A.M.

answers from Seattle on

My oldest did the same, as soon as he bit, I would immediately unlatch him and put him down and walk away and ignore him for a little bit. ( he hated that and still hates to be ignored)

He learned really fast that if he bit that nursing session was over and he learned not to bite. He too like your son thought "no" was funny. ( he still loves getting a reaction!) But just being ignored, that did it I had him cured in less than a week.

The only other problems I have had with anyone biting is when they are falling asleep, I have avoided most of that by unlatching them as they are almost about to let go ( if I am awake) I have had no consequences for that since it is never intentional and my fault for not paying more attention.

Hope this helps!

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B.S.

answers from Honolulu on

Try flicking his cheek. That's what I do when my 8 month old bites.
good luck!

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K.F.

answers from Portland on

My son also did this around 8-9 months - and he had 7 teeth by then! I didn't find anything that was a miracle cure, but whenever he bit I would set him on the floor and tell him no and that it hurt. After a couple of minutes I would try nursing again and if he continued to bite we stopped until later. The few times it was really bad (I also had blood!) I would pass him off to his dad and walk away. There were a couple of days where he went a long time without eating. The good news is that the worst of it lasted only a week or maybe two and we rarely have any incidents now. At this point he will unlatch himself and turn his head to bite my arm if he is going to try to bite and I can usually see this coming. I just kept telling myself that it must be because his teeth hurt and he would move past it.

One thing that I made sure to do was not let him bite/chew on the bottle nipples when his dad or babysitter fed him. I didn't want milk associated with any biting! It also seemed to help to feed him when he was tired - the biting was worse when he was playing around.

Hang in there - if there is one thing that almost got me to quit nursing it was the biting!! If it continues you could try pumping and giving him bottles until he stops.

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M.B.

answers from Bellingham on

I had a biter too! I would Growl or say no, set the child down and leave the room and close the door! Let him cry, he will get the picture real fast.

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C.G.

answers from Portland on

My son is nearing eight months and just a few weeks ago he started biting while nursing. I would say quite sternly "no" and then stop the feeding. When I researched causes, I read that babies will often bite if they aren't really hungry (meaning they are bored) and/or if they are teething. I think my boy was bored. He seemed curious about my reaction and would look at me to try and figure me out. Then he'd break into the biggest smile of the day, which made it VERY easy for me to forgive the transgression. For us, I didn't really have to "do" anything beyond saying (not yelling) "no") because as quickly as he started biting, he stopped. Well, I did try to be more aware of how often I was offering him milk to make sure I wasn't overfeeding him. Good luck. Those little teeth are sharp!

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H.A.

answers from Bellingham on

When this happened to me I immediately took him off the breast, looked him in the eyes and told him no. Then I closed the shop!!! Meaning he didn't get any more at that feeding. He shortly afterward expressed that he was hungry and I fed him and nothing happened. When he bit me the next time I did the same and that was the last time I had to cut the feeding short for he got the message, no milk if I bite!

good luck
h

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C.K.

answers from Portland on

Read the responses and giving up nursing is the one I disagree with.
When my first born did that to me, my reaction was to flick him, I mean I didn't even think about it. It was such that he drew blood as well. He cried, because I think I scared him more then anything, because I screamed and flicked. But you know what, the next time he even started it, he got the "look" and the "no" and it only happened once.
Giving up nursing is not the answer, stay with it as long as you can, give your baby the healthy choice, they get enough processes stuff in their lifetime, let their beginning be the breast. I nursed all of mine until they were 15 months, and they are healthy grown men now. :)

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S.W.

answers from Seattle on

L.,

We are not there yet, I have an almost 5 mo. old. I have heard that you flick them when they bite.
good luck

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C.S.

answers from Portland on

Hi L.,

I have three boys, 2 of which were biters. My five year old used to do it (at about 9-12 months) when he got really excited when we were playing and would just bite the first body part he came into contact with. I would say no biting & we would just have to stop playing, he caught on &/or grew out of it...

My second son would bite me every time he was done nursing like it was his cue to me he was full, he too thought it was very funny to see mom's reaction shock/scream. I would simply stop nursing too.

Not much help - but you are not alone.

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J.V.

answers from Seattle on

Sounds to me like its time to ween. Let him bite a nipple on a bottle all he wants. good luck.

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C.W.

answers from Portland on

My oldest son used to bite me as well when he was nursing and i tried all the same things you have tried. The only thing I found that worked for me was biting him back, I no this sounds mean and cruel but it worked. You don't have to bite them hard just hard enough to get there attention. My son quit biting after the first four times of me biting back.

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C.G.

answers from Portland on

Pinch his nose closed with your fingers when he bits and he'll let go. It's not at all painful or hurtful to him, and after I did it to my son twice, he stopped bitting.

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L.M.

answers from Seattle on

Pushing the baby into the breast really worked for me, I have rather large breasts and would push him in so he couldn't breath and he would be forced to let go. He would cry a bit mad that the fun of chomping on mommy was over, but it didn't last long using that method. I also remember putting him down the second he tried again (usually saying something about mommy not being his chew-toy) and walking away. Sometimes I would have to pump for my comfort, but I wouldn't give it too him.
Good luck
L.

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S.M.

answers from Portland on

When my son started that I said "no" firmly at the first bite and then packed it all up right then and there and he was done with that nursing. I also put him down away from me so he got no one to comfort his being upset over my having finished the session. It only took a couple times for him to figure out that it didn't get him what he wanted.

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A.C.

answers from Portland on

Hi, there, I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 9 month old. Oh, do I feel your pain! When my oldest bit me for the first and only time ;P, I screamed and then he screamed. He wouldn't nurse for the rest of the day because everytime he would look at me he would cry. Then he was fine after that. My 9 nine month old "chomps" on me and I yell. He may be a little harder to teach. 'P

My mom had seven kids and she would pull their hair when they bit. It worked for her.

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A.P.

answers from Eugene on

I don't really have any advice except to say that my son did the same thing! When I said no or would yell out in pain when he did it he would smile, even giggle! He quit pretty quickly after he started and I feel like I can tell by his face that he's going to bite me. Basically--he doesn't really like nursing that much any more and when he's done I just quit. It definitely changed my nursing relationship--we're all business now :).

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