I Think My 18 Month Has OCD

Updated on September 30, 2008
J.S. asks from Dayton, OH
32 answers

I am writing for any advice or even if you are in the same boat. My 18 month old will get her wipes out and will wipe her feet through out the day as if they are dirty. She has even taken the wipe over to my husband and started to wipe his feet. When ever she gets any dirt, crumbs, or even water on her hands she will come to me going Uh Uh and wants me to wipe her hands off. She will even come up and wipe her hands off on my pants when ever she is dirty. Another thing is that she was sitting on her little potty and she got some wipes out and she went on to clean her feet, my feet, the dog's toy that was near by and some of her toys. She was wiping all of these things down. She even started wiping off her shorts. And finally when ever I clean my hands with the water free soap she wants me to clean her hands... she thinks her hands are dirty. I thought kids like to get dirty. I guess not mine. Any help would be appreciated.

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S.F.

answers from Indianapolis on

Honey, at that age they are *all* obsessive-compulsive. It's a phase that all little ones go through.

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T.C.

answers from Fort Wayne on

My oldest was like that - he would walk over saying "dirt off" all the time. It was a phase and now at 16 years old he is never too clean - usually I am telling him to jump in the shower. My daughter is 20 months and she has to always have a wipe out to blow her nose or wipe something - think she gets it from always seeing me cleaning stuff - but with 3 kids something always needs cleaned.

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S.D.

answers from Cleveland on

My daughter went through this also. She is now 3 1/2 and is not as bad as she use to be. She would wash her hands all the time. If she spilled anything, even a drop of water on her clothes, she had to change right then. If it was food, she would change and if i didn't put the dirty clothes in the washer right away she would cry until I did. She will only use a napkin once and then it must be thrown away immediatley and she gets a new one. We went out to eat last week and they had cloth napkins and she was really worried about getting the napking dirty, we explained that it was ok and that they wash the cloth napkins but it really bothered her! Atleast she is the age now that she can wash her own hands and get new napkins etc..... It really has improved over the last year. She use to hate stamps or rub on tattoos on her hands and such. She will actually get them now. On the plus side, she is very neat, cleans up her toys, her room is much cleaner than her 7 year old sisters!! I have even found her picking up her sisters room!! I just tell her, come on, sissy needs to clean her own room and she stops and is ok with it. Good luck and hopefully things will get better for you too:)

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M.R.

answers from Cincinnati on

Just something to consider: Are you a neat freak? Are you constantly cleaning your children's toys, hands, etc? During your child's infancy, did you constantly wipe or clean her? Is this perhaps something she has picked up from observing you? (not saying it is bad at all!) I have noticed that my 19 month old son copies a lot of 'cleaning' sort of acts that I do, down to patting/wiping his hands outside after playing in the dirt all while making the 'ew' face. Additionally, I've always served his table foods to him on plates that have sections and I just randomly decided to put the fruit in one section, the veggies in another section, and the meat/protein in the third section. Now when he drops a piece of fruit into the meat section guess what happens - it gets moved to the 'correct' section. Yeah, he totally got that from watching me I'm sure.

You should have an 18 month appointment with the pediatrician if you haven't already. Check in with her doctor and see what the pediatrician has to say. Also check to see how she reacts when she isn't allowed to wipe or clean...sometimes people with OCD perform the repetitive acts either to comfort themselves or out of fear that if they don't perform the act, something bad will happen.

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K.B.

answers from Cincinnati on

My son HATES to be dirty...always has. He washes his hands multiple times a day, vaccums regualarly (he's 5!) He use to use wipes to clean everything, and we even had to put a limit on how many times he brushes his teeth. His toys are put away in certain places. I have mentioned this to his doctor and she just says "Yes, he could be." Nothing further. So far, it hasn't interfered with his regular life, there aren't any rituals or anything so I think he just has traits. I just wanted to let you know, your not alone. :) My son definitly spends more time cleaning than any other child I know. He throws fits if something is dirty and he can't clean it. I am NOT by ANY MEANS a neat freak. Actually, he often tells me I need to clean up my room and such. He got better when he went to school. He had an AWESOME preschool teacher who reassured him for two years that it is OK to be a little dirty sometimes!
I don't know how to help you. Try to limit things if you can. You can ask your doctor for advice too next time your there.

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L.L.

answers from Indianapolis on

I'm no expert but I'd say you just have a clean kid. My son was a very neat eater. He would request his mouth to be wiped and on his first birthday he had a cupcake and I expected the huge smears of frosting and messy cake everywhere, but no. He's always been that way. Likes to keep his shoes neat and clean. He never jumped in water puddles, no matter how much I encouraged him. Now, he's five and most of that is disappearing. I'm trying to keep him out of water puddles in his good shoes and he's dropping crumbs everywhere.
You'll be telling her future husband these stories and laughing!!! Good luck.

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O.T.

answers from Youngstown on

As long as she doesn't eat the wipes, I see no concerns with using them. Seems she likes to clean and her feet, your feet, are at an easy level for her to reach.

My sons never liked having sand or anything sticky on their hands and would complain until I cleaned them up.

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L.D.

answers from Cleveland on

I wouldn't get too worked up about it. At that age, children are imitators. They do what you do... she knows wipes are for cleaning and is using them to clean everything! It will pass, I am sure. If it doesn't go away in a few months, then talk with your doctor.

Good Luck,
L.

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V.T.

answers from Cincinnati on

Hi. I definitely don't think your little girl has OCD or that she has a problem at all. Cleaning is one of several signs that a child is ready for potty training. Especially it seems so with you when she likes to clean while she's on the potty. My 23 month old also is obsessed with cleaning. Whenever I use a wipe, she MUST have the wipe too so that she can clean whatever she wants to. Yesterday I was cleaning her highchair table off while she was still sitting in there and she said, "Beautiful Cleaning Mom." She's just a neat freak like her dad! I kind of like it. She keeps me on task and tells me "Good Job Mommy" when I'm cleaning. For a mom who rarely gets praise for a job well done, it's inspirational. I hope you can start seeing how cute she is and be happy that she likes cleaning. She'll never have dirty feet and she'll probably clean her room with no problem!

V.

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D.G.

answers from Columbus on

Hi J.!

I'm glad your concerned with your daughter's behavior, but have you considered that maybe she's just being 18 months and has discovered something new and fun to do...like washing feet with wipes? With all due respect, society has programmed us into thinking we must medically label ourselves and our children! Yikes! She's still a baby and she's just learning new things...Smile and Celebrate her discoveries!!

You are loved,
D.

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S.D.

answers from Indianapolis on

More likely, it's just a texture issue that she'll out-grow. Wait and see if it gets worse. Right now, it's a waste of wipes, but she's really not hurting herself so I wouldn't worry too much.

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M.R.

answers from Columbus on

J.,

We have a child with OCD, and we did see tendancies at this age, but she did not rise to a full blown diagnosis then. It really all depends on the frequency, and the ridgity that she has with the behavior. If she cannot function without cleaning her feet, or she imposes her rituals on ohters and cannot function if they refuse, and if this behavior interferes with a normal life, then you should worry about OCD. It is all a matter of degree. My gut reaction was that this sounds more sensory related than OCD type behavior, although many kids will have both issues. If you see anything else in her development that gives you reason to question "is this typical" then take this a little more seriously and see out an evaluation so that you can quit worrying about it...speaking of, if you worry a lot, it may be something she comes by naturally, tendancies run in families!

M.

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K.M.

answers from Toledo on

You can talk to her pediatrician about a possible Sensory Processing Disorder. She could have tactile issues. If the ped thinks she has it s/he will give you a referral to see an Occupational Therapist.

You can check out this site here:
http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/

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M.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

This is pretty normal for this age. I've known a lot of toddlers and have 3 children of my own. My oldest was this way and my daughter now has a son that is like that. They outgrow it, unfortunately for me there did come a day when I wished he were cleaner and neater!

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H.S.

answers from Cincinnati on

I just wanted to chime in on this as I saw a few responses from people saying that OCD doesn't start until the teenage years - so NOT true!! My oldest suffers from OCD, and has been since he was 2 years old! However, after saying that, it sounds as if your daughter might just be going through a phase. I know many children that do not have OCD that are very clean kids! I also wanted to add that OCD doesn't mean that someone can't stand to be dirty as is the perception by many people. It can be that, but there are many other areas. My son that has OCD, doesn't mind getting dirty at all!! Matter of fact, he remains one of the messiest kids I know!!! Hang in there. If you continue to be worried, talk to her pediatrician. Best of luck, H.

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T.P.

answers from Canton on

It's a bit early to be thinking about OCD. Some toddlers go thru these "need to be clean" stages. My son does it, my niece does, my oldest son did it too. I wouldn't worry about it yet. If it persists over the next couple of years, seems to get worse, or interferes with every day life, then I'd start to worry. But not yet. She sounds normal to me! :-)

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L.G.

answers from Lima on

I wouldn't worry too much yet, give it another year, then if this continues in the same manner have her checked for OCD.
My now 6yr. old daughter always wanted to put on deodorant just like mommy did, and perfume, makeup, shaving my legs, etc...
Something like using wipes is something simple that she can do. So she may actually be doing something she feels is being independant.

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H.M.

answers from Cincinnati on

A child with OCD would not be able to function if everything isn't just so. She's probably seen you clean things with wipes since everything comes in a wipe these days and children like to mimic what they see, especially mommies - I used to wipe my daughter's feet with wipes if they were stinky or dirty and she did it occasionally and still likes to get out wipes and wipe down things. Unless she's throwing huge tantrums when you don't give her access to a wipe or a way to clean herself I wouldn't worry - some kids don't really enjoy being dirty, sometimes they enjoy the activity that gets them dirty but when they are done they want to be cleaned up right away. My son was that way. This really doesn't sound extreme enough for OCD which is a serious mental disorder - I think it's a term we use a lot to describe the weird repetitive behaviors we all do, but unless there is a severe reaction or fear associated with it there's really nothing to worry about.

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A.E.

answers from Cincinnati on

I agree with a lot of the other mothers' feedback as well regarding the possibility of mimicking what she has seen or just liking to be clean, but another thing to consider is it may also be she enjoys the sensations involved with the wipes or soaps, or that she doesn't like the sensations of dirt or certain things on her skin. A lot of kids have sensory sensitivities that make them hypersensitive to certain sensations. If it is an extreme case it can be called sensory defensiveness and you could talk to an occupational therapist to determine if that's the case. I'd more closely watch how you interact when cleaning and how you respond to her requests for cleaning her hands and see if she responds that way more because she thinks that is what she is supposed to do or if it truly seems that the sensation itself is uncomfortable to her. My daughter loves carrying around wet washcloths or wet wipes in her hands because she enjoys the feeling, but lately she has also started to understand that wash cloths and wipes are for cleaning so she will wipe it on her head or chase the dog around and try to wash him with it. In her case, it is just something she enjoys, but I think it would be important to continue to monitor your daughter more closely to see if you can get a better feel for the root of her behavior. If you continue to be concerned, you can talk to your doctor, or a developmental therapist (for OCD related concerns), or an occupational therapist (for sensory needs) to see what other elements might be involved.

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D.T.

answers from Indianapolis on

No need to worry! It's a completely normal phase that most toddlers go through. Many 1 and 2 year olds exhibit OCD-like behaviors as they try to make sense of their big world.... like lining up cars by type or sorting toys into piles by color or constantly putting stuff in and then out of a box, bag or bucket. Many also go through a "cleaning" phase. But don't worry... it's usually followed by a "must be dirty at all costs" phase. :-) All my kids went through the cleaning phase you described and are perfectly normal and healthy. My son was the worst - he freaked if he got a little spot of food on his shirt at 18 months. Today he's 6 and needs to be reminded to wash his hands and usually resists baths/showers.

Part of the 'cleaning' phase is that they are trying so hard to copy other people at this age. So she sees you wiping down the counters, brushing the dog, washing dishes, etc and wants to do it.

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L.J.

answers from Cincinnati on

Dear J.,
I don't think your daughter has OCD. OCD usually comes later on in life toward the teenage years. I think she has a fasination with wipes and wants to be like mommy and clean things. I know kids have make believe friends but these habits pass in time. L. J

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T.H.

answers from Columbus on

Both my kids (4 yrs and 23 months) do this! They want to clean up like Mommy, but once they've gone through their alloted paper towels they start getting into the wipes. It's a game (one that I actually encourage) and completely harmless! Well, except when they start wiping the red wall in the dining room and the wipes take off the paint : )
As far as wanting to be clean all the time, I know several wonderful non-OCD children that can't stand the thought of dirt anywhere near them. Chances are it's just a personality thing!
With that said though, you're her mom, you know her better than anyone else and if you have that feeling in the pit of your stomach then by all means explore physiological sources. Good luck and enjoy your little one!

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H.G.

answers from Columbus on

I doubt its OCD-probably just a new activity shes currently into. my dd went through a similar 'wipe' faze. just mimicking mom-and i dont think you have to be a neat freak (i'm not) for her to have picked it up. just enjoy the cleanliness while it lasts!

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K.N.

answers from Cleveland on

From an experienced neat freak, my kids were the same way, my daughter more so than my boys, it passes, my kids still clean up well and put things back just so, but it's because i do it too, not a compulsive need on their parts. just wait soon enough your little one will be going to the store with glitter all over her clothes and face because she wanted to make a picture. speaking of which i gotta go sweep, lol. good luck.

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C.E.

answers from Cincinnati on

I have no advice to give, but was wondering if you could send her to my house? JK! it sounds like she has been watching Mommy clean and wants to be like Mommy!

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M.L.

answers from Indianapolis on

J.-
As hard as it is to not worry about things, I would try to relax about. My daughter is 2 and she is all about the wipes. Wiping down her table, her baby dolls, her hands (she LOVES to wash her "handies"). She even sees me use a wipe as a stain preventer, and whenever she spills on herself, she gets a wipe to "get the stain out". She loves that water free soap as well. I think it really is just a mimic thing at this point.
I freaked out as well when she started to repeat the same things over and over and over...I thought she was showing signs of autism. My husband had to talk me down from that diagnosis. I think we all just want to make sure our kids are well adjusted and we catch any and all things that could be wrong with them. But that just isn't realistic! Enjoy these toddler years, it goes too fast!
God Bless You!

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R.N.

answers from Columbus on

I don't know if she has it ( I douibt it see last paragraph) but soemthing to think about... do you clean constently ( or your husband) when she used to get dirty as a baby were you constently wiping her face and hands? Sometimes it is a learned behavior and you were just doing it so that your couch didn't get ruined. How about making pudding and painting with your fingers? Wiping all over one another You getting dirty too? Go outside make some mud pies. If she sees you and dad getting dirty and you don't mind and you are Laughing and not freaking out while doing it, she may calm down too???

If not you may want to talk to you doc. As I recall though at 18 months ALL kids like order. they shut doors left open, drawers left oepn, its just our job at helping them to relax a little about such things.

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A.L.

answers from Indianapolis on

J.,

My experience was similar, but my daughter unfortunately has grown COMPLETELY out of it...and she is now 7. I am talking about eating a sandwhich then walking around with a jelly face, when before, it was wipes all the time for everything. I say, enjoy the clean child, as it may not stay for long- and you will have a jelly face too.

Good luck-

A.

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D.T.

answers from Muncie on

How often do you clean things? She might be mimicking. Does your husband or family members fuss over keeping things clean, or about keeping her clean?

I hope this helps.

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S.F.

answers from Fort Wayne on

I guess I wouldn't automatically think she has OCD because she likes to clean things. My brother and my dad are complete neat freaks, so it's just their preference. My neice is completely tidy too. My dad and brother didn't spend that much time together, so I don't think it's a learned habit. It's just a preference. OCD has many other repetitive behaviors and symptoms, so it's probably just something she likes to do. Perhaps it's a phase. My boys like to play in dirt, but as soon as they are done, they want cleaned up instantly... which often results in wicked little tantrums.

I would doubt your child is a germaphobe. She probably just picked up on that someone said certain things are dirty. She is probably using cleaning as a sort of play.

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S.P.

answers from Indianapolis on

I would relax.
My grandson is about this age and he likes to use wipes too.
It might be that she is just imitating you.
I bought my oldest daughter some fingerpaints when she was in KG and I was so reluctant to let her use them because of the mess.
Well, when I finally did get them out, she painted one picture and wanted to clean her hands and that was that.
She just did not like getting her hands dirty!
Now she has no qualms about it.....
I would just be watchful and perhaps not give her access to so many wipes.

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R.E.

answers from Mansfield on

J.,
I would not worry about OCD at this age and for this issue. Both of my daughters (8 and 4) did the same thing at her age. They hate to be dirty and also love to use wipes on everything. My oldest began to wash her hands a lot once she got old enough to do it as well as my younger daughter. However, my younger daughter was doing it to play in the water mainly (she drenched the bathroom everytime, and still does). Not all kids like to get dirty. We have pictures of my oldestsfirst b-day eating cake. She would not use her hands, she just put her mouth on the cake to eat it, she did not want to get her hands dirty. My son who just turned one wanted no part in his cake because it was messy. Every kid is different, and yes there are many that love to get dirty and there are some that don't. Your daughter is completely normal so don't worry. I can admit I did wonder about my oldest for a while, but she outgrew it, now she is an outdoors girl who digs for bugs, baits her own hook and comes in everynight covered in dirt.

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