Lesser of the Two Evils...

Updated on August 28, 2013
V.K. asks from Chisago City, MN
30 answers

I need to make a choice... But both of my options suck.

Option 1: Continue my existing checking account at the bank in my "home town". There are no fees, however, it is a 45 minute drive from where I live now. It is in the same town as most of my family and as my doctor's office, so I could wait to deposit checks until days that I have an appointment or if I need to deposit it immediately I could make the trip worthwhile by visiting family while in town. But, I already visit my family pretty regularly (Several times a month) and it's 45 minutes that I just don't want to drive.

Option 2: I could open a checking account at the bank that my husband uses. There is a branch pretty much across the street from where we live and would be very convenient. However, there is a $7 monthly service fee because I don't have direct deposits totaling more than $1000 every month (I don't have any direct deposits actually). The location is great but I hate the thought of throwing away $7 every month.

So, which is the lesser of the two evils?

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Featured Answers

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

Option 2 definitely. The even better choice is you share a bank account. Do you not do this bc you don't trust each other?

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B.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

ATM... you can make deposits and withdraws. I can't tell you the last time I was in the brick and mortar bank.

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More Answers

L.U.

answers from Seattle on

Ah yes. Now I remember who you are. You are the one with the husband that works MORE than 40 hours a week and makes good money. YOU are the one that stays home with the kids, has a side photography business, and had to ask your husband to LOAN you money to fix your car.
I do NOT understand you at all.
But, to answer your question. Open one up at your husband's branch. Pay $7 a month. That's cheaper than gas 45 minutes to and from somewhere.
Maybe your husband would spot you the $7 a month.
L.

13 moms found this helpful

C.O.

answers from Washington DC on

how much do you spend in gas to travel to your parents/family homes?

Why doesn't Justin open a secondary account for you under HIS account? Or better yet? Why don't you just put your money in HIS account and make it a JOINT account?

Does this go back to your "I have to pay him back" and money is kept separately? What happened to all the money you gave him while you guys were dating for your "dream home" - is that not YOUR money too? or is it ONLY his since it's in HIS account?

I'm sooooo confused by your marriage and financial situation....
many married couples have a joint account - we do - we have a his - mine and ours - we put our allowance in each of ours and everything else - in the OURS. Why do you insist on keeping EVERYTHING separate?

The lesser of two evils - is choice #3 - a JOINT account. If it happens to be across the street from where you live - SSSWWEETT!!!

Otherwise it does NOT make sense to drive 45 minutes for a bank.

13 moms found this helpful

J.W.

answers from St. Louis on

Three, use a joint checking account with your husband. :)

7 moms found this helpful
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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

Another joint money question, sort of. When an issue keeps coming up it often takes different forms but is rooted in the same problem.

When this happens to me I beleive it's the universe (God, higher power, my own subconcious?) speaking to me. Sometimes that problem has to keep knocking on my door again and again in different forms. Sometimes the problem I think I have is not really the problem that needs to be solved but just a symptom of the bigger one I've been ignoring.

Listen to the universe, it's talking to you (along with a lot of smart women on this message board;).

6 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Why aren't you already on your husband's account, close to home? I understand maybe wanting to have your own savings account (even though it's never really "yours" when you're married, is it?) but what a hassle not to have a joint account for all the bill paying and day to day expenses. I just don't get that.
Also what's $7 compared to the price of gas driving 45 minutes each way...unless you drive a hybrid (?)

5 moms found this helpful

C.V.

answers from Columbia on

It's time to join your accounts. You are married.

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J.A.

answers from San Francisco on

I was just thinking also, can't you just deposit into you husbands account and get a card for you, we have a joint account and both our paychecks go in to it. His is direct deposit and mine I have to bring. But it makes life so much easier and less confusing.

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R.M.

answers from San Francisco on

A frequent 45 minute drive will cost you more than $7. It's worth seven bucks.

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M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

Really? I don't understand why this is so confusing, but reading through some of the answers I see that money is handled in your house in a way that makes it a huge stress on you and your husband.

Why can't you keep your bank up the road (if you want a separate account) and add your name to your husband's account?

My husband and I did not have a joint account until we were married for a couple of years, but that was because we were paying off some of his old debt and wanted to have that money in one place.

WE have THREE banks that we use. Our main one is in Texas (we live in Maryland) so driving is not an option. We use it all online.

We have one bank that is 5 minutes from home. Great customer service, we love our banker there, and we use it to withdrawl cash or make deposits if necessary (though we can do that online with all 3 banks). My husband's paycheck is deposited there for automatic withdrawl of the funds to pay our loan with them.

The third bank we both hold savings accounts - separately, but we both have access. This bank is good for my husband being retired Navy and he can get discounted rates on loans and such. If the local staff was anywhere near decent, we would both do all of our banking there...but they suck.

So why don't you get on your husband's account and call it a day? If my husband refused to let me on his account or to have access to the money, I'd give him a swift kick in the rear and tell him to let the door slam him on the way out. Seriously.

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B..

answers from Dallas on

Why doesn't your money just go into one account? You only have to pay one fee that way.

For what it's worth, you will be spending more then $7 a month on gas to put it in the bank 45 minutes away. It doesn't even make sense that you bank at a different back then your spouse. Honestly, a joint account makes the most sense, but people have been telling you that for a while now so...

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J.G.

answers from Chicago on

Why have separate accounts? Everything is equally yours. I don't get separate accounts, but I'm sure you'd guess that based on my past responses.

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X.O.

answers from Chicago on

Are those really your only options? Can't you just get added on to your husband's account. Surely he has at least $1k/mo in direct deposits if he's gainfully employed.

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L.M.

answers from Los Angeles on

Option 3: Take a look at all the banks in your immediate area and choose one that meets your needs.

Why does it have to be at hubbies bank if it's your account alone?

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S.W.

answers from Amarillo on

Is there a credit union nearby? That might be an option. Get a bank near where you live and forget about the $7. That's a lot less than many banks charge.

I can't see riding up and down the road to keep a bank account in my hometown that I don't live in. The gas is more than that just to go when you get a chance to do the banking.

So, join hubby in a joint account, get an account in a local bank not with hubby or join a credit union. Sometimes the easiest isn't what you want.
Is your hubby a bad money manager as to why you don't want a joint account? I could see that then.

We have several accounts including two joint accounts that were started in different states by the same bank and a separate one when I did real estate to keep money separate. Now they each have a direct deposit going into them so it would cause a small problem to move the accounts but not that much and we would be "local" for all our needs. The account(s) would have to be in a regional system so that my children can put money in them for me for doing business in those states.

Always something to think about when it comes to finances.

the other S.

3 moms found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

Why can you not use your joint account (most married couples have one) to cash your checks and deposit funds when you go to your home town when you go to visit family?

I wonder if "his" bank has fee deals on having multiple accounts open and linked to each other as well... many banks do these days.

3 moms found this helpful

K.A.

answers from San Diego on

The best option: A joint family account that have both your names on it that you both have complete access to at a bank that doesn't charge any fees for the type of banking your family needs to do that is in the neighborhood your family lives in.
Why does this have to be as difficult as you are making it?

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I.W.

answers from Portland on

I agree you should have a joint account with your husband.

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H.W.

answers from Portland on

I'd say that the cost of my time and the gas costs would be worth more than seven dollars; the price of having regular access to my money would be worth it.

That said, the ideal thing would be to save money by having a joint account. I don't think anything we say can change your mind on this subject, V., and I once felt that I needed to have 'my own' account for a long time. So, I kinda get where you are coming from. That said, when my husband and I finally did get a joint account, everything got a lot easier. Since then, the only time I've had my own separate account was when I was running my preschool, and that was to keep things very clear for tax purposes. AND it was a total PITA to deal with going to a different bank 10 minutes away, etc. Just sayin'....

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D.B.

answers from Eau Claire on

Option 3: Find a bank or credit union closer to you that doesn't charge any feeds.

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A.M.

answers from Washington DC on

My credit union allows us to deposit checks using a smart phone. It also reimburses the fees other banks use for withdrawing from their ATMs. I think it does this 5 times a month.

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Geesh, spend $30 bucks on gasoline to deposit a check instead of using an ATM and paying a minimal fee or drive to a neighboring town to your own bank. Why can't you do online banking?????

I'd say keep the free account and use it as a savings account or something where you can do it online, still have access to it by going home to visit family of course but not something you have to do on a weekly basis.

Then open your own account in a different bank than your hubby. It's obvious you guys keep your finances separate so you don't want to link his account to yours in any way. Even if you are using the same bank they'll get it confused sooner or later.

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R.P.

answers from Omaha on

Hi V., I would suspect that you spend more than $7 in gas each month driving to your home town. If it were me, I'd pay the $7 fee and go for the convenience of having the bank close to my home.

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M.G.

answers from Seattle on

Look at it this way: Would it cost you more than $7/month in gas and wear and tear on your vehicle to make the trip more than once a month to deposit checks? If so, then you have your answer. If not, then there ya go.

Why not bank at your own bank apart from your husband that does not charge a monthly fee?

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A.K.

answers from Iowa City on

What about a joint checking account with your husband? Could you open a separate savings account with a debit card?

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C.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Seems to me you'd use more than $7 in gas to make a deposit so the closer bank would make more sense. You could wait until they have some sort of promotion offering free checking. Heck, when I opened my account, I went to the bank that my boss banked at and just told them I wanted to open an account, but I was not going to pay any fees. They wrangled things so that I got what I wanted. Just go in there and tell them what you want. If they won't offer a no-fee account, go to another bank. There has to be more than one bank in your town, right?

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O.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Time and money on gas at your current bank is way more than $7 per month. JMO. Switch banks. Good luck.

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

Does your current bank offer "bank by mail" or have a local ATM in your town? You could mail your checks (make copies of them first) with a notation for deposit only to the acct of ________. ask your bank what is proper. They may even have bank by mail envelopes with pre paid postage. Ask. If they have an ATM in your town or close by you could deposit your check there. Several banks now offer the ability to take a picture of your check and deposit it on line.

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J.S.

answers from Green Bay on

One of our banks is online only. The only physical location closed last year. So if we have physical checks to deposit, we just mail them in. When we moved to a town 2 hours away for a few years, the other bank we used was good savings and loan rates, so we stuck with them and I just started mailing those checks in as well. The cost of a stamp is a lot less than the cost and hassle of driving! If the online banking system in your "home town" bank isn't stellar, look for an online banking option.

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