Need Encouragement for Battling Night Wetting

Updated on August 27, 2009
C.S. asks from Crescent City, CA
12 answers

Hi moms! I have been on here before with countless questions/frustrations about my daughter's urinary health. This time I just want to know, am I doing what is right?
We finally have decided that she is wetting in her pullup at night because "she can"...in her own words even. SO, last Monday we decided NO MORE PULLUPS!!! YIKES!!! I purchased bed pads, a plastic cover for her matress, the whole nine yards...I explained to her where the extra pads were and set out extra undies incase of an accident. She has gone 2 nights dry and only one night with multiple accidents. We are waking he to go potty at 10pm before we go to bed and then she is waking in the middle of the night after she has an accident...
My question is: is all this lack of sleep worth it? Are we moving in the right direction? How long is this going to last? I dont want to put her back in pullups, but come on...all this getting up and changing pads and washing pads...is it all worth it???? I guess I just either need to know that I sohuld make an adjustment to this plan or encouragement that I am doing the right thing...

Added: We have talked to her doctor (Countless times infact) with regards to this. He was actually the one that said take away the pullups and wake her every 2 hours! We first said NO WAY...but once it seemed to us that she was wetting the pullup "because I can" we figured it was time to test it out. I am proud to note that she is 2 nights straight with no accidents (got up once each night to potty). I think she is on her way...and we arent putting any pressure on her, this is what she wants, she doesnt want to wear pullups...so we are giving this a go...Thank you all for your encouragement!

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your responses. I just want to assure all of you out there (maybe I came across a little harsh) that I am in NO way forcing my child to do this. Nor am I making her feel insecure about wearing pullups. This night time "wearing panties" idea was hers and hers alone (most likely because her cousin's are night trained). With the advise of our doctor, we decided to give it a try. Anyway, She is doing awesome. She is 4 nights in a row with no accidents. Therefore, I believe this was the right decision for my family. Thank you all for the encouragement. :)

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C.A.

answers from Seattle on

My children are 12, 10 and 4 years old. The oldest two are boys and quit using pull-ups about a year ago. Their bodies simply weren't ready before that. We tried taking away the pullups but they would wake up drenched every night -- deep sleepers!

My 4 year old is not ready. She often wakes from naps with a wet bed. She has been day trained for quite some time, but her body is not ready for night time.

So, each child is different. And each parent is different. You do what works for you. The laid-back approach works for me. :)

Good luck!

Oh, and yes, we have had mattress covers since they were infants. :)

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J.C.

answers from Anchorage on

waking them up to potty at night just causes lack of sleep. A child will stay dry when their body is mature enough to hold it through the night. For some this happens young, my son at 2. For others it takes longer, my nephew was 6, my cousin was almost 12. Now normal in between the ages of 2 and 6. Forcing them to sleep in undies when their body in not ready to hold it or wake them up is just setting them up for frustration and embarrassment.

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M.J.

answers from Seattle on

I would talk to her doctor before you put a ton of pressure on her for the night wetting. Sometimes there is a chemical imbalance in kids that causes this to happen. Before you put too much pressure on her (or yourself!) I would have a quick chat with her doc just to make sure you are doing the right thing for her medically and emotionally.
Good Luck!
MB

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H.B.

answers from Portland on

I would say to try what you are doing for a few nights, but don't get too discouraged if she's not ready. We've tried that with our daughter, but went back to pull-ups after she was getting frustrated and we were getting tired. It never worked for her. So, I figure her body wasn't ready. I'd rather have her think it's no big deal, than have her worry about what she can't control. Hope it works for you though!

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M.H.

answers from Seattle on

Hello,

Just wondering has she had a physical done to rule out urinary medical problems like a bladder infection? Urinating multiple times in a night seems excessive to me, but I didn't have much of a bed wetter, so maybe not.

If all has been ruled out medically, then I'd say you are doing everything right. I would really try to keep emotion out of it, especially at night. Try not to grumble and moan. Just clean up and get back to sleep.

Positively,
M.

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Z.A.

answers from Seattle on

It's worth it. :)

To not have to wash pads you can get puppy pee pads, or hospital incontinance pads, that just toss in the garbage. Course, the kids don't always make it easy by being pointed in the right direction. But every time they DO, it makes it easy peasy.

Another trick too, is to give them a whole bunch to drink right before bed after they've gone potty, instead of restricting fluids. They'll have to get up in the middle of the night...but there's no mistaking the "gotta pee!" feeling from a full bladder.

We did that on accident (my son is HUGE...growing like crazy...and hypoglycemic to boot...so he's always drunk about 20oz of warm milk right before bed. When we took the pullups away he had a couple of accidents...but was night trained in just 2 or 3 nights.

Why I say on accident, is that I've run into few people on this board and a couple of people IRL, who do this on PURPOSE...so that the "gotta pee!" feeling links up quick. Everyone i've talked to who has done this (on purpose or accident), their child was night-trained FAST. Makes sense.

But yes. Worth it. Worth it. Worth it.

:) Keep up the good work :)

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J.S.

answers from Bellingham on

I can't tell you if you're doing the right thing, only you can know that for sure. But I can tell you that we went through all the same frustrations and sleepless nights with our first. What it boiled down to for our family was that regardless of what we did, none of our children were potty trained at night until they were six years old. After all the stress and headaches of trying to force our oldest to "fit into the norm" we just let it go with the younger kids and let them do it in their own time. They did, at about six, and never had anymore problems.

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M.B.

answers from Seattle on

C Marie,

You ARE doing the right thing! If she is getting up to go potty at night, maybe start phasing out the 10pm waking. My son was 4 1/2 when we finally got him potty trained. One thing we did with him, and still have to do, is go potty last thing before climbing into bed, and first thing when he get up in the morning. We also made it clear to him that if he had to go potty at night and Mom and Dad were asleep he could go.

Hope this helps, and keep trying it will get better!
Melissa

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L.G.

answers from Eugene on

Don't battle it. If she hasn't got a urinary infection or an incompetent bladder or a kidney disfunction, you can wait it out for a few years. Forget about giving up the pull-ups. Some children a very emotional but they hold it all in and it comes out through bed wetting.
Many girls who have weak kidneys cannot control the flow of urine at night or when asleep until they are six or seven.
Many boys wet their beds until the hormones kick in and they can maintain control.
Homeopathy done by a very competent homeopath can work. Chinese herbal doctors usually can help when the kidneys need to be strengthened.

I know it's hard to cope but really Mom it is not your little daughter's fault. She is doing the best she can.

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J.C.

answers from Seattle on

They did not have Pull Up when my kids were bed wetting and I thought diapers were a little much after the toddler age. I went as far as an alarm system for any little moisture on the mattress and nothing changed the accidents. My kids just slept so sound that bed wetting happened and I had many extra pads and loads of laundry for many years. We just did what we had to to keep up and yes some nights it was multiple changes of the bedding. They will get good at making the bed and they WILL grow out of it. Keep up the good work. Pull ups or not. It is hers and your decision. Here is an inexpensive laundry soap recipe. It is hypo allergenic also.
http://www.duggarfamily.com/recipes.html

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S.Y.

answers from Richland on

You are doing the right thing. My 4 1/2 year old son started bedwetting again while we were camping. My doctor said a change in environment, schedule, or stress can cause that. Don't go back to pull-ups; just stick it out and she will decide not to wet anymore. Remember to not give drinks after dinner and the rest you are already doing. Hang in there!

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B.M.

answers from Portland on

HI There!
I know these things are tough! My situation is a bit different, in that my daughter has autism, but I never pushed it at all. She just recently decided she did not want a diaper at night, all on her own! She is five and has been potty trained since 2 1/2 poop trained just in the last 6 months and just now gave up diapers. for me, I just did not want to fight that. Choosing battles can be hard at times, but if you really want to sleep and let her try again in a month, then do that. Limit her drinks a few hours before bed and have her potty just before getting into bed! Good luck! I know being a mom (or dad) is the hardest job!

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