Questions for Moms Who Have Nursed While Pregnant.

Updated on May 22, 2008
J.V. asks from Glendale, AZ
20 answers

My son, Conner is 16 months old and I am 12 weeks pregnant. I am still breastfeeding (demand feeding), and he is still loving it. He does eat solid foods, but still breastfeeds also. He has actually increased his night feedings, though, since I have been pregnant. He used to sleep a decent stretch (5-8 hours or so) before waking, or at least just get up every 4 hours or so. Now, he wants to eat every 2 1/2 hours it seems. He also has started not wanting to take the nipple out of his mouth at night, which has caused some frustration both of us, as I try not to let him do this. So, my questions are this:

- Did your child self-wean when you were pregnant and nursing, and if so, when?
- Did your child nurse through the entire pregnancy, and if so, did you then tandem nurse, and if so, for how long?
- Did you ever night-wean your child, or did you continue to let them eat whenever?
- Did your child increase in frequency, or is it just mine?

I really can't see him giving it up any time soon. He really just loves it too much. I'm just wondering how it was for everyone else :). Thanks for your help!

*** I am not worried about nursing while pregnant. I talked to my midwife, son's doctor, and Naturopathic Dr.. As long as you are not high-risk, are in good health, and are taking care of yourself, are not overly sick (I have only thrown up 2 times, and it wasn't from being pregnant, it was from being sick) it's ok. It causes slight contractions, but so does sex. I am not planning on giving that up either :). I appreciate those who are concerned, but I am not posting this to debate about the issue, just to get feedback from those who have done it :).

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So What Happened?

Well, he's 21 months old, I'm delivering in 2 weeks, so I guess I'll be nursing two :). We did gently work on cutting down on his nursing and he is doing really awesome at night!

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E.S.

answers from Phoenix on

I just have to say I am so glad I am not the only one.. Minus the fact that I am not prego right now. But, my daughter is 16 months and still breast feeds and I also co-sleep I love it... Bt the teeth are starting to cause an issue. I too was hoping she would self ween , but hasn't.. Best of luck to you..

E.

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D.H.

answers from Tucson on

I got pregnant when my daughter was 10 mos. old. I weaned her at 14 mos. because we were both not sleeping. She did sleep better after weaning, I think she just liked the soothing at night. It was a tough decision, but I had a better pregnancy because I was just too tired otherwise.

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C.B.

answers from Santa Fe on

I got pregnant by surprise when my older son was 13 months old, and he was -- and still is! -- VERY attached to nursing. I had planned on going at least 2 years with him, as I had done with my oldest son who is now 12. Neither of us was ready to stop, so he kept going the whole pregnancy. During the third trimester I did get him used to not falling asleep with my nipple in his mouth, and it helped him -- and me -- to sleep through the night. Of course, when his baby brother came, he wanted to nurse all the time, and for the first two weeks I didn't bother fighting him, I was so tired. But as he came to accept the ideas of sharing and taking turns, he also came to accept just nursing at bedtime and naptime again, plus morning snuggles nursing. I still tandem nurse them at naptime because they both seem to want to nurse at the same time for the older one's nap. That's just a matter of experimenting with different positions and finding one that physically works for everyone. Sometimes I feel like a cow, but then it's pretty sweet when the baby looks at his big brother on the other side and smiles, and my 2-year-old reaches across to hold hands with the baby. By the way, I'm 43 and had 2 water births after 2 hospital births. All were over 9 lbs, and this last one was 11 lbs 12 oz (no, I was not diabetic). The most important thing at all times will be to do what feels right to you -- trust your instincts!

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S.L.

answers from Tucson on

I have always nursed my babies. I got pregnant with my second son while my first son was only about seven months old and I didn't know for the first couple of months - my doctor said it was safe to continue nursing so I did - about three weeks before my older son turned a year old he wouldn't nurse anymore - he pretty much decided on his own that he didn't want to - I am not sure if the milk started decreasing or tasting different or what but he definitely self-weaned. About four months later his brother was born and within two months after that the older son was potty trained. My second son nursed for about 16-18 months before self-weaning. My third son was born about 10 years later and he nursed for a couple years. We also used cloth diapers for all of them (when feasible) and did a lot of co-sleeping - especially with the youngest - he had some sleep issues (apnea) that we finally had to address with surgery (tonsil- and adnoid-ectomies) but I am sure that nursing them all helped to improve their immune systems and health - as well as my own. Best of luck!

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A.

answers from Albuquerque on

My oldest self weaned at about 21 months when I was about 21 weeks pregnant. She was already night weaned, which I encourage simply because you need your rest now! We were on a don't offer, don't refuse schedule by then and it just happened naturally.

If you'd like help getting him to sleep through the night while cosleeping, read Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution. Good Luck!

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D.L.

answers from Phoenix on

Yes it is possible to nurse while pregnant. I breastfed an a child during 4 pregnancies. Your milk supply will probably drop by the 4th or 5th month and some children self wean at that time. Some do not or begin again when the baby is born. You may also find that your nipples are extremely sensitive, this calms down around the 4th month.

Your son is 16 months old and so many changes are beginning to occur in his life- sometimes they can nurse as much as a newborn and sleep much worse at this time regardless of pregnancy. It is an overwhelming time for a toddler. They eventually grow out of it, but it is hard not to get frustrated w/ it when you are in the middle of it all. He could also be boosting your milk supply by nursing all night. Try to do it more during the day and see if he goes longer stretches at night.

Best of luck

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W.B.

answers from Phoenix on

I got pregnant when my son was five months old. I continued to exclusively nurse him for a few more months, then only night nursings for a few more after that. While everything said he would wean when I was four months pregant, he didn't. in fact his feedings increased, as did your son's. I think it was because my milk was not as rich as it used to be due to some of my nutrition going to grow the new baby. I finally had to stop him because I could not physically eat enough to keep my milk up and feed the pregnancy. I was always eating and still I was exhausted. It broke my heart because I was set on nursing him until a year. I would guess since your son is older and milk is not his only nuturition, you will be fine. Best of luck and Congratulations!

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E.J.

answers from Phoenix on

Hi J., I have three little ones that I nursed. When my oldest was 15 months old I got pregnant with the second baby and my 15 month old knew I was pregnant before I did I think b/c one day she just stopped and I nursed her a lot! and a few weeks later I found out I was pregnant. My I got pregnant with the 3rd baby when the second one was 15 months old and she didn't care I was pregnant, she nursed until 2 weeks before I had the baby and she just quit on her own, like she knew it boobs were for the new baby now. We did let her know that when the baby comes that she will be done and it didn't bother her a bit. And I didn't feel any more tired, more hungry but I didn't gain more weight b/c of it.
I would say as long as your pregnancy is going well and you feel good then let your little one nurse away it is always a great alone bonding cuddle time. My daughter was funny she thought it was hilarious if she was having a drink and the baby would kick her:) Congrats on the new pregnancy how exciting!!

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H.H.

answers from Phoenix on

I breastfead all 7 of my kids and, except for the first two, I allowed the last 5 to nurse until they weaned themselves. With my first two I was still working and only nursed the first one about 10 mos, and the 2nd for 14 mos. The third breastfed until she was 8 (yes, that is not a typo). She nursed thru my next 3 pregnancies. The next three all self- weaned at around 3 years old. And, I am currently still breast-feeding my almost 4 year old. At one time I was breastfeeding 3! "Take a number" my husband used to say!
According to the World Health Organization, the average age world-wide to wean a child is 4.2 years. So there is nothing unusual about nursing until the child is in kindergarden.
I allowed my little ones to breastfeed wherever and whenever they needed to. No-one ever bothered me with rude comments, I was always up-front about it and most people are fascinated with it.
My children have always been welcome to snuggle in bed with mommy any time they needed to. Some slept all night, some part of the night, most were in their own beds all night between age 2 1/2 and 4.
My children were all born at home and were all present to watch each of their siblings be born.
My children have never been vaccinated. My older college- age kids have traveled throughout their lives to China, Japan, Costa Rica, and Mexico and never had a problem. One of my kids contracted Rhubella once, and as far as I was concerned it was a blessing, all my kids caught it (before the age of puberty) were sick for 4 or 5 days and are now all naturally immune for life.
Breastfeeding, co-sleeping, etc.. is only there for such a short time in their little lives, I chose to give to my children generously and selflessly for as long as they needed.
My children are now ages 24,22,17,15,12,10, and 3 1/2.
The older ones are very successful, including a College Graduate with honors, a Junior Olympic Level Gymnast, 3 Child Models for a large Department store and have done 7 TV commercials and numerous print ads. Everyone of them have made Honor Roll. They are all confident, popular, smart, energnic, and SUPER HEALTHY! If you want extra support in this type of living subscribe to "Mothering Magazine" and "The Compleat Mother" Magazine ~H~

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J.C.

answers from Phoenix on

I nursed my son until I was four months pregnant. He was 15 months old. I had heard that the milk changes flavor at around four months of pregnancy and it was pretty ironic that this is when he self-weaned from his daytime feedings. For the last week my son was only breastfeeding at night and it felt like he was pretty much eating all night! He just wanted to stay on my breast the entire time (we co-slept) I finally was soooo tired from the pregnancy that on the last night we breastfed, I had to put my foot down and just not nurse him. My husband and I sandwiched our son between us and held him while he cried himself to sleep. I knew at that point that he really was not getting any milk from me he was just using me as a pacifier. He never nursed again. He sometimes would try to lift my shirt and so I would offer it to him, but once he was latched on, he would just look at me and smile and get down:(

I was never concerned about my own or the babies nutrition and I really enjoyed feeding my son until he was ready to wean himself. I had thought about tandem nursing, but was really wanting to wean my son prior to the birth of my daughter, so that she would have the same bonding experience as my son and I had. No regrets and my children are HEALTHY and happy! We still co-sleep (they are 4 and 3) and we all love it except for when they are thrashing in their sleep:}

Good luck to you and I would just let your son lead the way. My friend also breastfed when she was pregnant and her daughter weaned at about four months into the pregnancy as well. Definitely interesting, but there must be some validity to the milk changing flavor, etc. Let me know if you have any other questions:)

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B.S.

answers from Tucson on

My best friend was in this EXACT same situation. I am going to forward your request to her via email, I'll let you know what happened. (I could probably give you some info, but I don't want to get it wrong!) ;)
B. S

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A.H.

answers from Phoenix on

I became pregnant with baby 2 when my son was 6 months old. He was breast fed and I was very very tired. When I was about 3 mos pregnant the OB suggested wean him because of the exhaustion. I wasn't sure how this would go but we did it slowly and by 10 mos he was weaned. He was pretty easy though.I started with his day feeding and left night for the last. But I now have 3 kids and am breast feeding abby 3 but I have initiated all my weaning and I do it sowly. My second child BF doe 20 mos.

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D.T.

answers from Phoenix on

i have no advice for you other than to check out the breastfeeding forums at www.mothering.com (go under the "discuss" tab to get to the forums). also, check out the book "adventures in tandem nursing." if you find out anything about how to keep milk supply up while pregnant let me know, i think i might be in your same exact boat!

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A.H.

answers from Phoenix on

Dear J.,

I was in your boat just about 8 years ago so I know how you're feeling!! I exclusively nursed my firstborn until he was a year old. He ONLY nursed (not by my choice...he hated everything we offered him!) Needless to say, we had quite a bond us two -- and when I found out I was pregnant, I was already 16 weeks along. I had only had two periods the whole first year after my son was born. When he was about 16 months old, he was nursing less and less and before I knew it, he was eating more and only nursing before naptime and bedtime. He did not get up in the night to nurse like your son is doing, but may I suggest a book called "Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems" by Dr. Richard Ferber -- my 2nd born developed the habit of only sleeping if my nipple was in his mouth and it nearly killed me I was so exhausted! So...my first doctor's appointment with #2 was when I was 20 weeks pregnant and I told her that I was still nursing #1. She did not say that I had to give it up, but I felt that it would be best for my first son if I weaned him before brother came so that he didn't feel like someone was moving in on his territory and making him feel threatened. I didn't like the idea of tandum nursing -- only because I didn't want to overwhelm by body, my growing baby or my milk supply with the demands of 2 children who had completely different nutritional needs!! So...I slowly weaned him, and by the time he was just over 18 months old, he was completely done. On one hand I was a little bit sad, but I also felt relieved. I wanted him to be more independent when #2 came, and again, not feel like someone was coming in and taking over his territory. There was no jealousy, there was no resentment...he adored his baby brother and loved to watch him nurse. A couple of times I offered to let him nurse too, and he looked at me like I was crazy!! It was like he knew at that time that he wasn't a baby anymore (although he wasn't quite two!) but it just worked out great for me to slowly wean. I don't regret it and would do the same thing if I was ever in the same predicament. Good luck and congratulations!

A. (Happily married SAHM of 3 boys ages (almost) 10, 8, 4 and baby on the way due end of October!)

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V.J.

answers from Phoenix on

I got pregnant with my second child when my first was only 4 months old and breastfeeding. My OB advised me to stop breastfeeding by my second trimester so I nursed for only 2 and 1/2 months while pregnant. In retrospect, I wish I had had more info because I hated switching my son to formula just because we had a surprise pregnancy. I had planned to breastfeed until a year and I wasn't ready to give it up and neither was he. I'm currently breastfeeding my second child at 10 months old. Anyway, good for you! It's so great that you will be able to continue to nurse your son. As long as you're both happy with it, then go for it!

My sons both weaned themselves off of nighttime nursing when they started sleeping through the night around 3-4 months old. They did go through growth spurts here and there when they did require night feedings so maybe that's all that is going on with your son now. Maybe try feeding him a little extra solid food with dinner or before bed to keep his tummy full.

Good luck with everything! Sounds like you're doing a great job!

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M.S.

answers from Flagstaff on

I found out I was pregnant when my baby was two months old, so I kept nursing until she turned five months old. I had to stop nursing her because she got really cranky all of the sudden. Like as soon as I found out I was pregnant until I stopped nursing her. I think she wasn't getting enough milk. Or it tasted different. So I put her on the bottle and she was much happier. And she started sleeping better at night. I put her on the bottle out of the necessity for my sanity(i also had a two and three year old). I think most of your questions you have to answer based on how much patience you have and if you really want to keep nursing your 16 month old. Which I have to say good for you! If it works for your family, then keep doing it!

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B.D.

answers from Phoenix on

J., I've been there :) It can be tough, but you need to do what works best for you are your family. I have 4 children. I got pregnant with the second when the first was just 9 months old. I continued to nurse through the pregnancy, I didn't notice any big changes in the older one, he just decided that solid foods were good; he weaned himself the day his brother was born. When our daughter was 7 months old I got pregnant with #4, she really increased her nursing, especially at night. When she was almost 1, after much thought and prayer, I decided to nighttime wean her. She was nursing all night long and I wasn't getting any sleep and was very cranky because of it. Nighttime weaning went surprisingly well and after 2 nights she was sleeping all night long. Nighttime weaning led into her giving up nursing altogether at 14 months, which surprised me, not nursing all night long really helped my relationship with her. I was ready to tandem nurse, but my kids gave it up before the next one was born. The longest I have nursed is 22 months and that was a very slow weaning. My youngest is 3 months right now and I'll nurse him until he is 2, or when he is ready to wean. I hope that this is helpful. It is always refreshing to hear from other moms who nurse while pregnant. It is totally doable :)
Blessings, B.

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C.W.

answers from Las Cruces on

Hi J.! First of all I did breastfeed my daughter all the way until two months before my son was born, and I was high risk, but everything worked out fine. My daughter slept with us also, so her night waking to feed was more of a habit and not a necessity. Once I learned that after about six months they no longer need the feeding in the middle of the night, I decided to put a stop to it. So, everytime she would wake up in the middle of the night I would lay her back down. At first she would cry, but then she went back to sleep. We did this for about a week and then she realized she wasn't going to get any milk, then she started sleeping through the night.

Concerning the self-weaning, I don't know if children can self-motivate if they aren't motivated first by the parents. My children are fourteen months apart and I had decided that I was only going to breastfeed for a year before I even got pregnant. So, it was a choice/necessity for me to stop. I was getting bigger and it was an inconvience for both of us. So, once she turned a year I just stopped her. I gave her whole milk in a bottle and after having a stomach bug and throwing it up for about a week, she was fine. My doctor told me something that was so true. It's really harder on us as parents to let the baby stages go than it is on the children. We had to take her off the pacifier at the same time, and put her in her own bed, so there was a lot of changes going on, but she responded favorably to all of them. The younger they are, the more adaptable they are. We just think we are being so cruel, but in the end it's better for everyone. Hope this helped a little bit.

***Side note...Like I said I nursed my daughter for a year, and two months later my son was born, so I was a little burnt out. He came seven weeks early and I wasn't ready to start nursing again. So, I ended up not nursing him really at all...everyone's different, but you might consider stopping him sooner rather than later, to give yourself time, so you're not burned out as well.

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C.S.

answers from Phoenix on

Congrats on the new baby! and hooray to you for your willingness to nurse through your pregnancy. I so wanted to have the experience of tandem nursing, but both my two weaned during my pregnancies. The first was only 8 mos old when I got pregnant, and he weaned himself just before he turned one. My other was 16 mos when I got pregnant and she weaned herself sometime after, I dont recall exactly. My desire was to continue nursing, but they say the milk changes taste and sometimes prompts them to wean. I dont know what did it, it wasnt my choice, but they weaned. Blessings to you!

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E.C.

answers from Santa Fe on

You should check with your doctor or midwife because I was told when I got pregnant that continuing to nurse my 14 month old could be detrimental to my health and pregnancy. Primarily, continuing nursing would have drained my body of much needed calcium and other nutrients that were needed to help grow my new baby. I felt really bad, because my son loved to nurse and I wasn't quite ready to give it up. I cut him off cold turkey and he was pretty grumpy for a few days, but he got over it.
Good luck with whatever you decide.

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