My son has a new friend.(girl) They are 5 and 4 years old, respectively. Today, my son informed me that, during today's playdate, his friend told him that "somebody's been licking her vagina" that's right, ladies, this is a big deal.
I called the mother of the little girl, and when I broke the news to her (expecting her to come unglued, as I certainly would) she said that she "wasn't concerned" and that she often "makes things up". this little girl obviously A)has heard of this in adult conversation B)actually is being abused or C)is watching adult films, which molesters often do with their victims before they make a move
I don't know the mom well, we have only had 2 playdates. but, would you assume maybe she knows of something going on and is trying to hide it? is she just in denial? am i overreacting? i'm just not sure weather to keep on her about talking with her daughter or to go straight to the authorities. I'm really stressing here, and I need some feedback.
Is there an update??? This is truely a scary situation and i agree with all the responses that say CALL...
Absolutely, positively do not let your children have any more play dates with this family until you are 100% certain the mother has addressed this with the proper authorities. While young children can be imaginative and make things up, it is usually harmless things like imitating when they see mommy and daddy kiss, etc. The words you used are most definitely a red flag.
I don't know where you live, but in Cincinnati you can call 421-kids (or is it 241-kids?), the police, or child protective services (<name of county> childrens' services).
If you feel like you might be starting trouble over the girls' comments, don't. I bet you would rather have this be a true misunderstanding than to let something serious and dangerous go.
Go to the authorities; she's obviously in denial. Be the voice that this little girl needs.
I agree with everyone else. Without a doubt, this needs to be reported to social services/police. That sounds a little too detailed for a 4 year old.
Hello. I am friends with someone who was abused. She told me that growing up she use to tell people and they never took her seriously because she was so young. She said she wished someone would have spoken up. She was told to tell an adult and she did. I say CALL today not tomorrow. I hate to say it but something may happen. If you feel that someone will single you out you can do it without being a known person. Call your local police or county child welfare department. CALL Call Call please.
I would totally freak out! I would also try and gain more information. It may be hard but there's little to go on there. If you can't then I would call anyway
I just want to back all the other mom's up. Call CPS or the police immediately! IF something is truly happening to this little girl, you can take the frist step needed to help rescue her.
In my experience when children that young know that much detail about sex, they have been sexually. I would go to the authorities if it were me - anonymously maybe.
I would be concerned also to hear this from a child. This is nothing something that children make up. She has either heard it somewhere, has really had it happen to her, or has been watching things thast involve this. No matter what if I was in this position I would be calling the authorities. This is something the mother should be concerned about also. It seems that based on her response to your reaction to the situation is that she knows something is going on. This in my opinion needs to be reported and investigated by the right people. As a mother for a child to say something like that would have me very concerned. If i was in your position i would report it. Good luck and I hope that this gets fixed for this childs wellbeing.
You must report it and let the authorities handle it from there. I wouldn't have play dates with them anymore.
CALL, CALL, CALL! It's the only thing to do!!
I would have to agree with all of the other ladies here. She seems a bit young to make a statement like that. Just to be on the safe side I would report it and let them take it from there. Goodluck to you and know you're doing the right thing.
H.
I would call social services NOW! If they dont have an emergency number for the public to call at least talk to a police officer, they would know who to call. Also an authority figure would know about it. That way IF something is happening or did happen over the weekend you would not always be thinking "I should have called or done something!" I cant believe the mom wasnt shocked! I would be HORRIFIED! It does sound like she is exposed to things that a 4 or 5 y/o shouldnt be exposed to. Even if its just hearing her parents talk about it, that should never happen!
God bless you!
S.
Just wanted to chime in to back up the rest of the ladies so far. Better safe than sorry- kids do make things up sometimes but usually not that kind of thing. If it turns out to be nothing than great and if it is something else terrible than you may save this little girl from a lifetime of pain and problems. Also since the mother is not a lifelong friend or someone you know well than if you loose the friendship over it it isn't going to be a huge loss. Good luck- good for you for not sweeping it under the rug- alot of times good people look the other way when it comes to situations that are uncomfortable.
First of all, you are not over reacting! This is a very serious matter. I was molested by my own dad from the time I was 7 to the age of 12 when someone reported it to the authorities finally! It can really mess up a childs' mild! It should be investigated as soon as possible, in case there is something going on (as I believe there probably is). That way hopefully there won't be too much damage done to her mentally or physically (female problems).
OH MI GOD! WHY HAVEN'T YOU CALLED YET? Now, that is harsh, I know. I have a degree in Social Services; so here it goes. If you EVER suspect a child might be abused 1)ABSOLUTLY NEVER EVER CONFRONT THE PARENTS as they are typically the abusers or know who the abuser is. 2) Children do not come up with that graphic wording by themselfs; even if she is only watching her parents or X Rated films, it is still CHILD ABUSE. 3) Call you local police department or Child Protective Services immediatly, you do not have to give them your name, but it is helpful if you do and they tend to take it more seriously if they know who the complainant is and it is not a 'custody dispute' or something along those lines. PLEASE call the authorities if you have not done so yet!
