When to Start...

Updated on May 21, 2008
A.D. asks from Norwood, MA
26 answers

Have any of you had any luck with potty training your child early? My son is only 9 months old and i'm not really in a rush to get him trained but WOW wouldnt it be nice to not have to change diapers! Just curious to hear from other moms who have tried to train early if they succeeded or failed. What age did you start? Thanks in advance for stories shared!

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So What Happened?

Thank you guys so much for all of the stories shared. Like I said i'm not quite sure i'm ready to start but I do want to introduce it. I don't want to train him to go in his diapers just so that i have to train him later to go in the potty. I am a stay at home mom and I have the time to devote to this. I went ahead and ordered a potty chair but I will more than likely just let him play with it until he can walk (which isn't going to be long bc he is already walking around holding on to stuff). I am in no rush; we can afford diapers and I will change diapers for as long as it takes. Thanks again!

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L.P.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi A.,

Remember to enjoy these little things, like diapers, that will be gone before you know it.

L.

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V.G.

answers from Clarksville on

My son was very young when I started to train him and he was out of diapers before he was 1 1/2 years old. I used an egg timer and just had him sit on the little potty for a few minutes every time it went off. Eventually, once he got the idea, I rewarded dry pants with a jelly bean or 1 smartie from a roll of smarties. If he actually went on the potty while he was sitting there, I gave him two treats.

It all depends on the kid how successful you will be. My daughter was not as easy to train and still had accidents until she was more than 3 if you didn't remind her to go. I am now training my second daughter and it is going well, but slow. Good luck!

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C.H.

answers from Raleigh on

every night at bath time my son peed on the floor or in the tub seconds after he got in so even though he was only a year old we tried to potty train him. It worked on the first try but then he regressed and now at the ripe old age of two he refuses to go. I can't even bribe him with m&m's! I wish I would have stuck with it because now I have two diapers, but I do agree it is more work to take a one year old to the bathroom than to just change a diaper-but it can be done.

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D.L.

answers from Lexington on

Hi A., I sure understand how nice it would be to have an early escape from all that poop! Trouble is, if you start trying to train him now, he isn't physcally able to cooperate, and the best you will be able to accomplish is training yourself to catch the BM's--really more trouble than it's worth. Plus, you will be setting yourself up for a power struggle that HE has all the control over. My advice is to forget all about potty training at this point. Be as "neutral" as you can at diaper changing time--just "matter of fact." Later, when he approaches his 2nd birthday, introduce a little potty and talk about how he's almost big enough to start using it like mommy and daddy use the big toilet. At that age, they are starting to want to do everything you can do (including drive the car, LOL--so keep him away from the steering wheel.) Waiting and helping him achieve control of his body will be much easier than starting too early. I hope this is helpful--I am mom of 4, grandma of 5, sitter of too many to mention! D.

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H.W.

answers from Louisville on

Hi! A.,
Children are Different. I'm a mother of 7 children.First
question.Is your baby still taking a bottle.if he is the
The first thing you want to do is get him off that It makes it a lot easier for you to potty train.If you can get him off the bottle.Most likely he'll drink less at night.My baby girl threw her own bottle away about 9or 10 mos.old Then I noticed about three weeks later she would be dry when she got up in the mornings.So then thats when I started putting her on the potty every morning fisrt thing.and on avg. about every 2 hours.Within a couple of weeks she was potty trained.I found it help ful.If I gave her a snack. If she done something in the potty.Most of my children were potty trained at 10 to 15 mos. 3 at 22 to 24 mos. 1 of them was almost 3 I think it all depends on the child.Some children are more difficult than others.Be sure and always praise them if they do something.I hope this might help.And good luck.By the way My baby now is 23 years old and has her own baby boy he's 6 I think he was potty trained about 15 mos. old. Again good luck.

H. W.

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S.S.

answers from Lexington on

you could potty train as early as you like, just remember that if your child cant walk to the potty, pull down his pants, and get on the potty himself, you are creating a whole lot of work for yourself. i think that 18 months would be as early as they could do some, but not all, of those things. it is actually easier for mom to change a diaper because you get so fast at it, then to stop what you are doing, and spend 15 min. helping a 13 month old go on the potty. but many kids are very ready right before they are 2, and you could give it a try.

D.B.

answers from Memphis on

We tried to train our 1st one early as I was expecting #2 about a month before she turned 2. I didn't want to be changing diapers on 2 children but I found it was worth it for the stress-free potty training. We pushed her so much and she did fairly well but when #2 was that age, he wasn't talking, so I didn't mess with training him. I was pregnant with #3, she was born 18 days before he turned 2. At 2-1/2 one day he went into the bathroom, ripped off his diaper and peed in the pot. After that he refused diapers and was trained day and night w/in 3 days. SOOOO much easier than the months it took with child #1. No frustration on either party, no swinging back and forth between bribing and threatening, no constant washing of clothes/bedding...just done.

There are books, one comes to mind by the Pearls (but some view them as rather harsh...I never read it myself), out there that show you how to train them early. But IMHO, a few more diaper changes was worth the peace of mind of waiting until they showed definite signs they were ready. Since my son didn't really talk till he was 3, I just never thought he was ready because how could he tell me he needed to go? He managed, and after that with children 3-5 I waited till they were about 2-1/2 before even beginning the training and I never regretted the wait.

Hope that helps.

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A.R.

answers from Chattanooga on

There are two main approaches to potty training and then different techniques for both types. There is "parent centered" potty training, wherein you push your child to potty train in order to make things easier on the parent, and then there is "child centered" potty training wherein you respect the child's readiness, wants, and wishes by waiting and letting the child do it when they are ready. Back in the days of all cloth diapers and no washing machines, children were potty trained by 18 months. It is possible to start as early as you like. You can get it done. It just depends on what approach you want to take. Good Luck.

R.V.

answers from Jacksonville on

Hi A.,

I'm the youngest of 7 children (3 boys, 4 girls) and my mom started the potty training process with each of us at around 9 months with complete success by our first birthdays. It does require some work and a lot of patience but it's definitely worth it. Don't be discouraged.

I also recommend the book Diaper-Free Before 3. It's written by pediatrician Jill Lekovic, MD and offers lots of research, tips and insight.

Good luck!
Ro

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M.T.

answers from Nashville on

I had 3 boys. They are the hardest to train. It usually takes alot longer for them to train than with girls.
They say that their muscles aren't even ready to be able to hold it until they are 2 yrs old. You don't want to do it too early as they will get frustrated and it will actually make them regress and take longer than it would have ordinarily.

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K.D.

answers from Raleigh on

I had a friend that started poopy potty training when hers was 4-6 monthes old. She saw the signs of needing to go poopy, ran her to the potty, and waited for her to go. She didn't have to change the diapers, however, she didn't really have a potty trained child, she had a potty trained mom.

I think that you can start as soon as you want to, but if your child is not ready you'll be the one doing all the work. I tried to start mine at 18 monthes, but after a few days she was no longer interested and we had a lot of messes. We tried again at 2 1/2 and it took at least 6 monthes before she was going when she needed to, and not just when I thought she did. She is 3 1/2 now, still has an occasional accident, and usually sleeps through the night without going. To me, it was worth it to wait until she was ready.

J.L.

answers from Clarksville on

Hi A.!

It is possible...it's called elimination communication(EC). You might find this website helpful, interesting and a valuable resource or you can google EC and go from there. It can be overwhelming but it is possible with patience, determination and tuning in to your lo.

http://www.diaperfreebaby.org/

Have fun!
J.

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M.H.

answers from Huntington on

Just FYI, children generally do not have sphincter control until the age of 2. The sphincter is the muscle which controls the flow of urine (you also have an anal sphincter which controls stool). Usually, potty training efforts much before that age only cause frustration for both parent & baby since the child is not physically or developmentally ready yet.

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L.C.

answers from Raleigh on

In a country that I am from kids are potty trained by 16-18 months. When our youngest was a baby (3,4 ,5 months) ,he acted the certain way when he needed to poop. So I put him on the toilet(while holding on to him of course:)) and he actually pooped and peed couple of times. I was lazy though and never stuck with it. Our oldest got potty trained at 2 1/2, we just let him go naked in the house and he potty trained himself.I know it can be done early, it was just too much work for me:)

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E.M.

answers from Louisville on

i have to say i have a 15 month old and i cant imagine potty training her thats just nuts! its not natural while some people say it works... you are training your self not the child you get to undress them carry them to the bathroom and sit and wait..... just sounds like a bad idea. ive never heard any thing good about it. but thats just me good luck on what ever you decide to do! :)

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G.G.

answers from Charlotte on

Just from my personal experience potty training two sons and two daughters, BOYS TAKE LONGER (usually!) Plan on considering yourself lucky if they are out of diapers before three! My oldest was three years and three months before he was consistantly consistant with it! My second son took no time, but was still just a few months shy of his third birthday.

My girls were trained, on their own, in a matter of days just about on or before their second birthdays!

Also, firstborns can take a little longer... they have no older sibling to be like! Next children want to be like older siblings so they are more motivated!

When you think he is ready (you may be ready much earlier- I know, I had two in diapers for a year TWICE!) use the "three days/$80 method." That's a long weekend (preferably in summer) with nothing on below the waist and $80 on Monday for your carpets to be cleaned! Do the pee pee dance at every success! Works like a charm when they are ready! Good luck!

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C.W.

answers from Chattanooga on

I have a grown daughter and son. I was amazed when, at age 14 months, she indicated that her diaper was wet and she wanted a change. I had not planned to start training her for months yet, but I thought if she could do that, she was ready to start, and within 3 months or so, we were done with daytime diapers. As soon as I (finally) took away her go-to-bed bottle, she was dry at night too. My son was a completely different story. I didn't even start trying til he was 2 and it was a nightmare. He had issues with lactose intolerance which I didn't even realize but that's a whole 'nother story. But it was also a control issue. He would go stand right beside the potty chair and wet his pants.

Thinking of my friends and their kids, the rule is that boys are harder to train, and take longer, than girls.

My opinion is not to even try til he's at least 18 months, and preferably older, unless he does like my daughter and asks for a diaper change. Good luck! Potty training is a challenge no matter what!

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J.K.

answers from Memphis on

It is possible!! My oldest son was trained by 11 months. He started everything early though. He was walking at 9 months. I am a sahm, and he was my first, so I had plenty of time to spend on just him. My second boy however was 3 months short of his 4th birthday before he was trained, I thought something was wrong. It just depends on the child. It takes a lot of work at that age so be sure you are ready before you start. Good luck

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H.F.

answers from Chattanooga on

I started at 18 months with my daughter. She is now almost 22 months and still peeing in a pull up sometimes.She hasn't had a bowel movement in a diaper/pull up in two months! And I beleive that 18 months is quite early. But it all depends on the child. If he don't like being dirty or you notice micheal going to a corner to have a bowel movement. Those are both signs a child may be ready. Pull ups come in a 2t-3t as the smallest size. But if you want, you can buy cotton training pants (they are sold in 18 mos) and Put the plastic diaper covers over them. (it will save your carpet/furniture) That way he will feel the discomfort of being wet. Good Luck!

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S.J.

answers from Lexington on

Hi, I’m a mom of 4 and the best advise I ever received was about potty training and it worked perfect! Put a potty chair in the bathroom at 15-18 months. This will let your child become familiar with it. Most likely they will stand on it, turn it over, use it as a foot stool, or maybe even a hat. You also want to start talking about pee peeing in the potty like mommy, daddy, and whoever else the child finds fascinating at that time. Talk about wearing big boy underwear like daddy. Around the 2 year mark watch for dry diapers when the child wakes up in the morning. At that point take off the diaper and put on the underwear. Most moms want to put pull-ups on but this gives the child mixed signals. Even though they act like underwear the child still knows it’s a diaper because they feel the same. I did this with my oldest 2 and it worked perfect. Good Luck!

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E.R.

answers from Jackson on

my children were all late potty training my oldest was about a year and a half and the doctor put her back in diapers said she wasent ready she finally got potty trained at about 3 3/4
years old my middle child was the easiest she was about 2 1/2 but I followed the drs addvice and waited until she was ready
my last one is autistic 9yrs old and we are still hoping one day he will be potty trained some times he will use the potty but more times than not he will need changed.it depends on the child and there development.good luck some times thats all it takes other times my prayers are with you.god bless

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C.L.

answers from Knoxville on

My daughter, Olivia, is 30 mos. We have been potty training since the week before her 2nd birthday in November. Obviously, I have no advice to give on the subject, but here's some food for thought: our children grow up soooo fast! These years are so precious; I can't believe how fast my baby has turned into a little girl. I do have friends who have successfully potty trained early, but we have not had much luck. She always goes in her potty when she wakes up & before or after her bath. I have some success throughout the day, but I find that if I push her things become negative quickly, which causes her not to want to go in her potty @ all for a day or 2. I am not convinced that she has the muscle control. I am perfectly content to let her be little & go @ her own pace. Everything that I have I learned thus far leads me to believe that they all go in their own time.

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A.C.

answers from Charlotte on

I read a couple of stories of people who started potty training from birth. I decided to try it and see how it worked out. I started her at 1 week old. It wasn't really training her as much as it was me learning when she was going to go. I would take her to the potty like every 20 to 30 min and drop a little cold water on her belly and she would start to go and I would say a word, so that she would associate that feeling with that word. Well, we didn't do it all the time but now that she is 16 months, it is sooo much easier. I don't use as many diapers as other people because I can sit her on the toilet no problem. If she doesn't want anything to do with it we don't force it on her. She sometimes does really well and I only have to change a couple diapers during the day. If anything, I would start having him sit on the toilet just to get used to it. I'm glad I started early. We train them to go in their diapers and then have to UN-train them to get them to go on the toilet. It's much easier to just start training them on the toilet.

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K.L.

answers from Memphis on

A.,
I have been putting my son on the pot since he was able to sit up (about 5 months). Of course he hasn't caught on yet, but babies are sponges and they absorb everything and eventually he'll understand. I actually did research on potty training from birth and this has been done in other countries for years.

People laugh about what I do, but it is my goal to never have to buy pull ups and to have my child completely potty trained by the time he is 15 months, but most people start about that age (or much later), but I think it's way too late. Besides, why not start now. It's not hurting anything.

Here is what I do...
I take him to the pot 10-20 minutes after each meal (or at least 3 times a day) and he goes everytime - whether it's # 1 or #2.
While he's sitting on the pot, we count to 20. (just to make the effort dual purpose learning)
After he uses the pot, We say , Mommy (or Daddy) look! I potty. Then we clap. Then we wash his hands in the sink. As he gets older, we'll start giving him treats after he pottys for more encouragement.

So far, there has been only positives about this experience and I certainly think we've saved a few diapers.

If you want to learn more about what other cultures do, google "potty training from birth" and check out the search results.

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K.R.

answers from Louisville on

With my 2 girls when they turned 2 they stopped wearing diapers and went to pull-up. We didn't start really trying till they were 2 1/2. It went pretty smoothly.

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J.M.

answers from Charlotte on

Our son is 16 months and about 2 months ago we bought a potty but we are just letting him get used to it. Most books say that when they start to show an interest in what you are doing on the potty its time to introduce one, but don't force them to use it. Make potty time fun if you can. This is what I do: if my son comes into the bathroom while Im going I make up a song (what ever pops into your head) sing about the process of getting ready to go potty, pull down pant, take off the diaper, now we sit on the potty and we go, go , go. when we're done we wipe, put it in to potty, we stand up put on the diaper, pull up the pants and then we flush and wash our hands! Until we do it all again.
If they dont want to sit too long dont make them. thats usually what I do

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